It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World - Blame and Greed in a Chaotic Pursuit
Benjamin: [to Culpeper]
It's all your fault, It's your fault right from beginning to end!
Col. Hawthorne:
You know, even for a policeman, your behavior was ruddy outrageous!
Sylvester:
Yeah, you could have taken a fair share like the rest of us, but no! You just had to go and grab up the whole scene, baby.
Dingy Bell:
We had 350,000 bucks right in our hands.
Melville Crump:
14 into $350,000...
Dingy Bell: [groans]
Oh, shut up!
Otto Meyer: [turns to Culpeper]
I wish I knew what they're going to do to us. But no matter what happens to us... ...what happens to you, I hope will be worse!
Culpeper:
I don't think you have to worry about that. My wife is divorcing me; my mother in-law is suing me for damages; my daughter is petitioning the court to get her name changed; my pension has been revoked, and the ONLY reason, that you ten idiots will very likely get off lightly, is because the judge will have me up there...to throw the book at!
2nd Cabbie: [laughs along with the 3rd Cabbie who smiles to Culpeper]
Awww...that's tough!
Culpeper:
I'd like to think that sometime, maybe 10 or 20 years from now, there will be something that I could laugh at, anything.
Mrs. Marcus: [yelling at the bandaged men; slips on the banana peel and falls back-first on the floor]
Now see here, you idiots, it's all your fault, because if you hadn't...!
Sylvester: [horrified]
Mama!
Mrs. Marcus: [yelling while being put on the stretcher and taken away by the doctors]
Don't you dare touch me! Get away from me! Let me go! Leave me alone...!!!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World - Fear of the Escaped Lunatic
Otto Meyer: [spotting an angry Pike approaching]
Oh, no! It's that lunatic! The one who escaped from the asylum! He's a homicidal maniac! He's got a hate complex! Go away, I'm not your nurse!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World - Urgent Request for Tire Assistance
Otto Meyer: [honking the car horn as he pulls into the Ray & Irwin Garage; clapping his hands over and over]
Fellas. I'm glad you're here. Look, I need your help. Here's what happened. I had this blowout. I think there's a spare in the back. It may be a little flat. Take a look at it will you kid? Is there an airport anyplace around here? Look, if the spare is flat don't bother fixing it. Gimme a new tire, all right? You ain't got a new tire? Then you'll have to fix the spare. But don't look at me. Move it, will you kid? You, you could be gassing up while he's working. What is it a staring contest? Come on! Move! Move, will you kid? Come on!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.