Richard KielQuotes

Samson: I think I broke his fuckin neck!

Announcer: I think he broke his fuckin neck!

Team doctor: [Examines injured player] One side, one side. Get the ambulance! I think he broke his fuckin neck.

Samson: See! I told you I broke his fuckin neck!

Happy: Oh, my God!

Verne Lundquist: This is incredible! Happy Gilmore wins the gold jacket.

Shooter: [bends down in defeat and agony] No! NOOOOO!

Happy: [kisses his grandmother; kisses Virginia; kisses Otto] I love you, you and you.

Shooter: [steals Happy's gold jacket from Doug, and runs away] Doug! Doug! Impossible! That's mine! My jacket! It's mine!

Happy: Hey! He stole my jacket!

Mr. Larson: [to himself; in anger; in slow-motion, Shooter runs as he puts on Happy's jacket. The crowd chases him. He angrily growls as he swings his arms] I believe that is Mr. Gilmore's. I'll get you, Shooter!

Man: We're gonna get you, you bastard!

Shooter: [screams, then collapses offscreen as the crowd attacks him] No! Get off! Ow! Get off! Get off!

Mr. Larson: Stay still!

Shooter: NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

Mr. Larson: Trying to reach the green from here, Shooter?

McGavin: That's not possible, sir.

Mr. Larson: I beg to differ, Happy Gilmore accomplished that feat no more than an hour ago.

McGavin: [turning round and seeing Mr. Larson; recoils] Well, moron, good for Happy Gilm- OH MY GOD!!!

Hymie Kaplan: Friend or foe?

Arnold: Guess.