Memorable Quotes from Ron Leibman
10 quotesVoices of Defiance in the Village Square
Captain Esteban
Arrest that woman! Now!
Charlotte Taylor Wilson
No, wait! Isn't this the village square, where according to law, everyone is allowed to speak his or her mind?
Captain Esteban
You're right, Señorita. The woman is allowed to speak! But arrest anyone who listens.
[yelling to the crowd]
Charlotte Taylor Wilson
Let your voices be heard! Oppose the… greedy bloodsuckers!
[to the crowd]
Charlotte Taylor Wilson
Thank you. I'm Charlotte Taylor Wilson. I'm with the People's Independence Committee.
Don Diego
Don Diego Vega. I'm with the… greedy bloodsuckers.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Tax Consequences and Personal Accountability
Captain Esteban
That man was three pesos short in paying his taxes. I can assure you that he will never be short again.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Mute Servant Sparks Humor and Irony
Don Diego
That is, uh, my servant, Paco. He is a mute. He cannot speak.
Captain Esteban
Oh, excellent! Perhaps he can give lessons to my wife.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Wit and Blades: A Sharp Exchange
Captain Esteban
Is your blade as sharp as your tongue?
Zorro
Is yours as dull as your wit?
Captain Esteban
You're a little clumsy, are you not, my friend?
Zorro
To be your friend, I would have to be more than clumsy — I would have to be estupid!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Captain Esteban's Unconventional Performance Instructions
Captain Esteban
Now, lisp like a sissy
Captain Esteban
That's right! Now, swing your hips …
Captain Esteban
Excellent! Now flap your wrists …
Captain Esteban
And repeat after me "You naughty, naughty, evil Alcalde! I am going to do … many terrible things … TO YOU!
[Esteban speaks in a greatly exaggerated ''sissy'' voice; laughs hysterically]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Introductions Among Notable Characters
Captain Esteban
Caballeros! I believe you all know each other?
Don Diego
Don Diego from San Fernando.
Don Francisco
Don Francisco from San Jose.
Don Fernando
Don Fernando from San Diego.
Don Jose
Don Jose from San Bernardino.
Luis Obispo
Luis Obispo from Bakersfield.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
The Turtle's Role in a Tragic Accident
Captain Esteban
Your father, I'm sorry to say, had a terrible accident.
Don Diego
Accident?
Captain Esteban
Sí. He was out riding when his horse was frightened by a turtle.
Captain Esteban
My friend — I want you to know that the turtle who caused this has been executed.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Repetitive Movements Lead to Frustration
Captain Esteban
Now walking and running and jumping in place, and…
Esteban, Diego
… now walking and running and jumping in place, and now walking and jumping and running in place—
[in unison]
Captain Esteban
STOP!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Misunderstandings in Identity and Relationships
Captain Esteban
That man in the black sombrero — this is Zero?
Old Man
I am certain of it!
Captain Esteban
Then the hideous dog you refer to must be my wife, yeah?
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Navigating Grief and Stress in Conversation
Mark's Mom
Oh, guys, don't stay in here all day. I had to take the batteries out of the carbon monoxide detector. It was beeping all night.
Dr. Cohen
You know, our bodies are capable of doing some very funny things when they're consumed by stress and anxiety. I found my ex-best friend's cufflinks in my wife's purse. I couldn't get an erection for a year and a half...for example.
Kenny
Your mom just died! ..... I mean, that's why you're home.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.