Roy ScheiderQuotes

John Klute: I understand you use narcotics. Maybe I can have a policeman come here and look at your... arms.

Frank Ligourin: You know, I may stand better with the cops than you do, pal. Why don't you just sit down and relax, eh?

Frank Ligourin: I was just finishing up some work here. I used to be a photographer, you know... before I got into publishing.

Bree Daniels: He knows you're a pimp, Frankie. He knows you were my pimp.

Frank Ligourin: [annoyed; she leaves] Excuse me... Bree, would you mind waiting outside? I always respected Bree. I want to make something clear: you know, I don't go to a woman. A woman comes to me. Her choice.

Joe Gideon: Who was that?

Katie Jagger: Michael Graham.

Joe Gideon: Who is Michael Graham?

Katie Jagger: A dancer in my ballet class.

Joe Gideon: Straight or gay?

Katie Jagger: What do you mean?

Joe Gideon: I mean, is he looking to get laid or is he looking for Mr. Right?

Katie Jagger: He's straight.

Joe Gideon: [turns to leave; leaves his room slowly but comes running back] And tall. Michael Graham is a very tall name. Ho ho ho... Goddamn you, how dare you use my phone! My telephone! To call someone who is not gay!

Katie Jagger: [laughing] I see! You can go out with any girl in town. Any girl.

Joe Gideon: [pointing] That's right! I go out with any girl in town. I stay in with you.

Joe Gideon: [about Katie] Why do you suppose she'd put up with this?

Angelique: I could think of many reasons for being with you.

Joe Gideon: Now, don't bullshit a bullshitter.

Michelle Gideon: It's just that I keep wondering, Dad. Why don't you get married again?

Joe Gideon: I don't get married again, because I can't find anyone I dislike enough to inflict that kind of torture on.

Joe Gideon: I always look for the worst in people.

Angelique: A little of yourself in them?

Joe Gideon: Yeah, a little of myself. And generally, I find it.

Angelique: Well, it may take you years, but you'll find it. Oh, you are cute. You are cute.

Joe Gideon: A great entertainer...

O'Connor Flood: A great entertainer!

Joe Gideon: A great humanitarian...

O'Connor Flood: A great humanitarian!

Joe Gideon: And my dear friend for 25 years...

O'Connor Flood: And my dearest friend for 20 years!

Katie Jagger: You missed by five years, Joe.

Joe Gideon: Oh boy, do I hate show business!

Katie Jagger: Joe, you love show business.

Joe Gideon: Oh, that's right. I love show business. I'll go either way.

Joe Gideon: Nothing I ever do is good enough. It's not beautiful enough, it's not funny enough, it's not deep enough, it's not anything enough. Now, when I see a rose, that's perfect. I mean, that's perfect. I want to look up to God and say "How the hell did you do that? And why the hell can't I do that?

Angelique: Now that's probably one of your better con lines.

Joe Gideon: Yeah, it is. But that doesn't mean I don't mean it.

Audrey Paris: Quick. Tell me. What was the name of the girl in Philadelphia, the blonde with the television show?

Joe Gideon: Ah, the blonde with the television show. The blonde with the television show in Philadelphia? I remember that girl's name. I remember that girl's name because that girl meant something to me. The blonde with the television show - her name was Sweetheart! Honey? Baby? I can't remember her name.

Audrey Paris: Dorothy. Dorothy.

Joe Gideon: Who cares? I can't remember her name.

Victoria Porter: [crying] No, you're right. I'm terrible. I know I'm terrible. I look in the mirror and I'm embarrassed. Maybe I should quit. I just can't seem to do anything right.

Joe Gideon: Listen, I can't make you a great dancer. I don't even know if I can make you a good dancer. But, if you keep trying and don't quit, I know I can make you a better dancer. I'd like very much to do that. Stay?

Victoria Porter: Are you going to keep yelling at me?

Joe Gideon: Probably.

Joe Gideon: Katie, I tried to give you everything I could give.

Kate Jagger: Oh, you give all right; presents, clothes. I just wish you weren't so generous with your cock.

Angelique: Do you believe in love?

Joe Gideon: I believe in saying, "I love you." It helps you concentrate.

Joe Gideon: To be on the wire is life. The rest is waiting.

Angelique: That's very theatrical, Joe.

Joe Gideon: Yeah, I know.

Angelique: Did you make that up?

Joe Gideon: I wish I had. Do you like it?

Angelique: Eh, it's okay.

Joe Gideon: [last lines, Joe is dying] Hey, at least I won't have to lie to you anymore.

Joe Gideon: [to [[God] ], during the "hospital escape" scene]" What's the matter, don't you like musical comedy?

Joe Gideon: [[pain; [jokes] The ] is gone. I'm OK. Nothing wrong with me a rewrite of the show wouldn't cure. A couple of good ] is what I need.

Joe Gideon: [to Victoria] Stop smiling! Lay back! Lay back! Hold it, hold it, hold it. Candy, Casey, very good. You're gonna do it again, Victoria. Gary, Danny, let's go. Stop smiling, it's not the high school play. Count! Hold it. Stand on your right foot. Point your left toe. Drop the shoulder. Now, that's not too hard, is it? Again!

Joe Gideon: [[Stanley Kubrick] Do you suppose ] ever gets depressed?

Joe Gideon: [to Audrey; to Katie] If I die, I'm sorry for all the bad things I did to you. And if I live, I'm sorry for all the bad things I'm gonna do to you.

Joe Gideon: [[ends; [truth; [begins] Sometimes, I don't know where the bullshit ] and the ] ].

Joe Gideon: [repeated line] It's showtime, folks!

Dr. Heywood Floyd: My dear Christopher: This is the last time I'll be able to speak to you for a long while. I'm trying to put into words what has happened. Maybe that's for historians to do sometime later. They will record that the next day, the President of the United States looked out of the White House window and the Premier of the Soviet Union looked out of the Kremlin window, and saw the new distant sun in the sky. They read the message, and perhaps they learned something because they finally recalled their ships and their planes. I am going to sleep now. I will dream of you and your mother. I will sleep knowing that you are both safe, that the fear is over. We have seen the process of life take place. Maybe this is the way it happened on Earth millions of years ago. Maybe it's something completely different. I still don't know really what the Monolith is. I think it's many things. An embassy for an intelligence beyond ours. A shape of some kind for something that has no shape. Your children will be born in a world of two suns. They will never know a sky without them. You can tell them that you remember when there was a pitch black sky with no bright star, and people feared the night. You can tell them when we were alone, when we couldn't point to the light and say to ourselves, "There is life out there." Someday, the children of the new sun will meet the children of the old. I think they will be our friends. You can tell your children of the day when everyone looked up and realized that we were only tenants of this world. We have been given a new lease and a warning from the landlord.

Dr. Heywood Floyd: Dear Caroline: This is finally it. After 9 years and hundreds of millions of miles, we are about to come face to face with the Monolith. The last human being who did that disappeared and was never seen or heard from again. Something truly amazing is going on out here, and I really believe this black giant is controlling it all. We have so much to ask. I have a feeling that the answers are bigger than the questions.

Dr. Heywood Floyd: Floyd to Milson: My news is a little better than yours. Discovery has been partially revived. I don't know how much damage has been done, or if we'll be able to bring it back home. Most of that is up to HAL. The drive system could be operated manually, so we were able to pull Discovery away from its decaying orbit around Io. I must say, the farther away I get from Io, the happier I am. It's a violent moon, even for Jupiter. Europa, for all its cold gray, is a lot more comforting. I tell you, Victor, there's some kind of new life down there, trying to get through all that ice. We are 10,000 kilometers away from the Monolith. I can't see it, except I know it's there. I also think it knows we're here. It's time to unleash Chandra. We'll see if our computer brain surgeon and psychiatrist can put HAL back together again. To tell you the truth, I don't know if HAL is homicidal, suicidal, neurotic, psychotic, or just plain broken.

Dr. Heywood Floyd: Dear Caroline: The first part of this journey is coming to an end. We are about to rendezvous with the Discovery. The race will be on now. We're going to send a boarding party over to climb inside this 800-foot long shipwreck, which is floating over Io, to see if she can be rescued before her orbit gives out. There are 9 years of secrets inside, including a sleeping computer who knows the answers. My past is also inside, and I want those answers.

Dr. Heywood Floyd: [[w:Io (moon)|Io; [w:Aerobraking|aerobraking] Dear Caroline: I miss you terribly. The time has come to put ourselves in orbit around ], which is where the Discovery is. And we don't have enough fuel to slow ourselves down, so we are about to use a technique called ]. The theory is that we will enter the outer layer of Jupiter's atmosphere, using what is called a ballute for a shield. The atmosphere will slow us down, and Jupiter's gravity will grab hold of us and slingshot us around behind the dark side. If all goes well, we'll wind up in a gentle orbit around Io. It's dynamite on paper. Of course, the people who came up with the numbers on the paper aren't here. Since no one has ever done this before, everyone up here is as scared as I am. The difference is they're busy. I have nothing to do but wait for it to happen. And I hope this is all worth it.

Dr. Heywood Floyd: [''Referring to [[w:Europa (moon)|Europa; [w:Exploration of Jupiter|sending probes; [w:Chlorophyll|chlorophyll; [w:Moons of Jupiter|any of Jupiter's moons; [w:Extraterrestrial life|life] Oh, there's something down there, all right. We all saw it; we read the data; we know it's there. But suppose, just suppose that it had something to do with the Monolith? Now, before you get that look on all of your faces, just listen to me for a minute. We've been ] out here since the 1970s. And so have you guys. But none of us have ever encountered even the slightest signs of ] on ], never. And we certainly were close enough, weren't we? 9 years ago, the Monolith was detected here. Discovery was sent up and everything went wacko. You catching my drift? So here we are, 9 years later, trying to figure out what the hell happened and what the Monolith was all about. And guess what we discover along the way? The possibility of ] of some kind where it had never existed before. I don't think it was electrostatic anything. I think something wants us to stay away from Europa.

Police Chief Martin Brody: [luring the shark towards a power cable] All right, you big bastard! Come on! I've got something for ya now! That's it! Attaboy, come on! Right over here! Open wide! OPEN WIDE! SAY, "AAH"!