Pizza Movie - Exploring Connection Among Resident Assistants
Sidney:
And I guess I'm just looking for ways to connect with the other RAs. Um, like, you know, what do you guys do in your free time?
Montgomery:
Oh, not much. Sometimes I Google "is my penis foreskin too long?
Sidney:
Hm. Yeah, well... I guess I meant more like communal activities. Like, do you guys go to the gym together or exercise or—
Montgomery:
I only go to the gym to sneak peeks at other guys foreskin to see if mine is way longer than normal!
Jack: [whispered]
What the fuck?
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Pizza Movie - Discussion of a Unique Music Genre
Ashley:
Well, I guess technically, it's new wave, non-consensual Death Metal Folk.
Montgomery:
Uh, what type of instruments is that?
Ashley:
So, George plays guitar, Simon's on horns, Tina's on drums, and I play Dudley.
Montgomery:
You play Dudley?
Ashley:
Yeah! I hook him up to this machine that simulates the pains of childbirth, and then I create harmonies from his extracted screams.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Pizza Movie - Consideration for Others’ Perspectives
Montgomery:
I mean, maybe you could stand to think a little bit more about other people's dicks.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Pizza Movie - Casual greeting with a humorous twist
Montgomery: [to self; head explodes]
Hi Ashley, how's your night going? Grood? "Grood"? Shart.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Pizza Movie - Unexpected Chaos on a Quiet Night
Montgomery:
Cheese and rice! I just wanted a quiet night, and now I'm gonna get chainsaw-fucked by the Rat King from The Nutcracker!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Pizza Movie - Humorous Confession About Personal Hygiene
Montgomery: [pause; beat]
Well, no one's got dirtier undies than me. Not from poop, to be clear. Or cum...
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.