Love at First Bite - A Eulogy with Unconventional Revelations
Reverend Mike:
I knew Brother Alvin... and he was a swinger!
Mourners:
Yes! Praise the Lord! Praise the Lord! Alleluia! etc.
Reverend Mike:
He loved his booze, hahahaha. He loved his women.
Mourners:
Yeah! And my wife, too! Yes, he did! Sure did! etc.
Reverend Mike:
But must of all, he loved his Cadillac Saville, and it's a beaute. I know, because he left it to me, Hallelujah!
Mourners:
Praise the Lord! Praise the Lord! etc.
Reverend Mike:
I showed him how God wanted him to have a swell time while he was alive. Because, brothers and sisters, when you is gone, you is gone. And ain't no way, no how, nobody's going to bring you back here once you is dead!
Count Dracula:
Good Evening.
Count Dracula: [''to Reverend Mike, thinking him a Hotel receptionist'']
I am Count Dracula. I would like a large suite with a bath. I have a reservation.
Count Dracula: [''Confused'']
This is not the lobby of the Plaza Hotel?
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.