What About Bob? - Miscommunication About a Phone Call
Bob: [to customer; Calmly; The customer hangs up; to everyone else]
Hey! NO, NO! NO! I'm expecting a phone call. Thank You. Thanks a lot. Thanks everybody, I really appreciate this. Also, uh if I... lose consciousness or black out or something explodes, would you tell Dr. Marvin when he calls that I was here...
Mrs. Guttman:
Dr. Leo Marvin?
Bob:
Do you know him?
Mr. Guttman:
Yeah. He bought our dream house. We worked a lifetime to save for a down payment.
Mrs. Guttman:
And he swooped down with his bag full of money, and grabbed it out from under us. Son of a bitch.
Mr. Guttman:
She never says that.
Mrs. Guttman:
Stay as far away from him as possible.
Bob:
Well, that'll be easy. He won't see me, that's why I'm waiting for the phone call.
Mr. Guttman:
He won't see you? Well, we'll show you where he lives.
Bob:
You will?
Mrs. Guttman:
The son of a bitch.
Mr. Guttman:
She never says that.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
She-Devil - Household Chaos and Misunderstandings Unfold
Bob's mother:
Is it that time of the month?
Mrs. Trumper:
Nurse Hooper may be short, but she's very devoted.
Ute:
Fuzzy has just shit all over the carpet!
Garcia:
I may be the butler, but I'm not the maid!
Mrs. Trumper:
AHHHHGH! Hooper! Vesta! This is long-term leakage!
Ute:
I took this job because I only had to cook and clean for one person and one dog. Then I get the mother, the lover, his kids, their dog! Ms. Fisher, up with this bullshit I will not put! I quit!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.