Tim Matheson Quotes

Alan Stanwyk If you reject the proposition, you keep the thousand - and your mouth shut.

Fletch Does this proposition entail my dressing up as Little Bo Peep?

Alan Stanwyk It's nothing of a sexual nature, I assure you.

Fletch Yeah, I assure you.

Alan Stanwyk One thousand just to listen. I don't see how you can pass that up, Mister...?

Fletch Nugent. Ted Nugent.

Alan Stanwyk Alan Stanwyk.

Fletch Ellen? Charmed. You know, for an extra grand, I'll let you take me out to dinner...

Capt. Loomis Birkhead Sir, you don't have any bombers here, do you, sir?

Col. "Madman" Maddox Bombers? Son, if I had bombers I'd be bombin the hell out of them right now!

Donna Stratton No planes?

Capt. Loomis Birkhead Boy, am I in trouble now...

Col. "Madman" Maddox Hell, son, the only plane I've got around here is that old shit on a shingle trainer sittin right over there.

Donna Stratton It's fine, it's fine. Let's go!

Alan Stanwyk Do you own rubber gloves?

Fletch I rent. I have a lease, with an option to buy.

Lizzie I heard you, you said "Annabelle".

Charles If I said "Oh, Annabelle". isn't it better that I said "Oh Annabelle" and was here with you, than to say "Oh, Lizzie" and be somewhere else with Annabelle.

Lizzie Charles, this is really important to me.

Charles Lizzie, Lizzie, let's not go through all this goodbye, I never want to see you again, because we will wanna see each other again. I mean two years, we're not going to throw away two years, are we?

Lizzie It was three years, in June.

Capt. Loomis Birkhead Is that the general's new secretary?

Pvt. DuBois Yeah, she just came in from HQ. Not bad, huh?

Capt. Loomis Birkhead Not bad? She's a goddess, DuBois, a goddamn goddess! That is Donna Stratton! I knew her back in Washington. She has got this thing for planes.

Pvt. DuBois One of those real high flying types, huh?

Capt. Loomis Birkhead I've never seen anything like it... she's got planes on the brain!

Gen. Joseph W. Stilwell Where's Birkhead? He's supposed to have my lunch.

Donna Stratton B-17. Mmm...

Capt. Loomis Birkhead No man has ever gotten to first base with her on the ground. But get her up in a plane, she'll bat your balls right out of the park.

Lizzie Annabelle, is that her name? Oh god, I didn't know that. All I know is what you did with her, on our sofa.

Charles Oh Lizzie, I'm sorry, I couldn't help myself. I've been smitten by Annabelle, I've been bewitched by her. I have been pounded flat on the anvil of love like a piece of veal with a salad on top.

Capt. Loomis Birkhead It's big. The biggest one here. You know what else? It's got a lot of range. You know what I mean by range, don't you? I mean, it can stay up for a long time. A very long time. And it's built firm and solid. Because it has to be. Because of its tremendous forward thrust. And when this baby delivers its payload... devastating.

Fletch You know, I came this close to buying this place, but then I found out that Hop-along Cassidy killed himself here.

Alan Stanwyk Who?

Fletch Hop-along Cassidy. Bow and arrow. Very Weird.

Alan Stanwyk What, are you doped up now?

Fletch Don't talk to me like that, ass-face, I don't work for you, yet.