Santa Claus Conquers the Martians - Martians Plan to Conceal Santa's Disappearance
Voldar:
If we take them with us to Mars, Santa's disappearance will remain a mystery. No one on Earth will ever know that Santa Claus was kidnapped by Martians.
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Santa Claus Conquers the Martians - Frustration Over a Christmas Figure
Voldar:
All this trouble over a fat little man in a red suit!
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...And Justice for All - Discussion of Profanity in Courtroom Testimony
Officer Leary:
I told him to move on, but he continued to use profanity and he refused to leave the premises.
Judge Rayford:
What sort of profanity?
Officer Leary:
You know, the normal kind.
Judge Rayford:
Officer Leary, we've all heard these words before, now for the record what did he say?
Officer Leary: [uncomfortably]
He used..."fuck" a lot.
Officer Leary:
..."piss on you"...
Officer Leary:
...then said he was gonna..."bung-hole the short order chef"..."cream on the waitress"...
Officer Leary:
...stuff like that, Your Honor.
Dapper Defendant:
There's a very good reason for all of that, Your Honor.
Judge Rayford:
Oh? What is that?
Dapper Defendant:
I'm a diabetic.
Judge Rayford:
I fail to see the connection. I've never heard of diabetes causing foul language!
Dapper Defendant:
That's because you're a douchebag.
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