Memorable Quotes from Whoopi Goldberg
22 quotesExpressions of Joy and Amusement
Katie Coltrane
I love when he does that.
Theodore Rex
Ha, ha! Whoo! Yeah!
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Consequences of Control and Oppression
Celie
The jail you planned for me is the one you're gonna rot in.
[to Albert]
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Transformation Through Love and Connection
Celie
Shug like honey. And now I's just like a bee.
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Supporting Family Through Difficult Times
Edmund Edwards
She's been through hell, and we're her family. So in this crisis, we have to support her.
[about Lori]
Rose Schwartz
Yeah.
Edmund Edwards
We have to love her.
Rose Schwartz
Mmm.
Edmund Edwards
We have to care about her.
Rose Schwartz
Mmm.
Edmund Edwards
And we have to milk it for every drop of publicity we can get.
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Consequences of Betrayal and Resilience
Celie
I curse you. Until you do right by me, everything you think about is gonna crumble!
[lunging towards Albert with a knife]
Sofia
Don't do it, Miss Celie. Don't trade places with what I been through.
Shug
Come on, Celie, let's go to the car.
Sofia
He ain't worth it, he ain't worth it.
Albert
Who you think you is? You can't curse nobody. Look at you. You're black, you're poor, you're ugly, you're a woman, you're nothing at all!
Celie
Until you do right by me, everything you even think about gonna fail!
Grady
It's been a pleasure meeting all of you. Goodbye.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Dramatic Revelations in a Soap Opera
Montana Moorehead
WAIT! Wait! But I'm carrying his child!
[as Lori, Celeste, And Jeffrey kiss and make up]
Jeffrey Anderson
I didn't sleep with her! Will somebody please believe me?!
Edmund Edwards
This is what I meant. This is what I told them to do. This is soap opera!
[offstage, delighted]
Jeffrey Anderson
Doctor!
Ariel Maloney
A second opinion... this is Dr. Frans Blau of the sex change clinic in Bethesda, Maryland.
Rose Schwartz
Thank you. Dr. Randall, after extensive investigation, I've come to the conclusion that it's virtually impossible for you to have impregnated your nurse, Montana Moorehead. Because before she came to our little clinic, she was... Milton Moorehead of Syosset, Long Island.
[German accent]
Rose Schwartz
Hello.
[normal voice]
Montana Moorehead
NO! NO! NO!
[shouts and runs off]
Edmund Edwards
She's a boy!
[offstage]
David Barnes
Yeah, well we knew that.
[starts gagging]
Edmund Edwards
Are you okay?
David Barnes
I'm fine. I'm just going to go congratulate the others.
[weak voice]
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Discussion of Abuse and Its Impact
Celie
He beat me when you ain't here.
Shug
Who do? Albert?
Celie
Mister.
Shug
Why he do that?
Celie
He beat me for not being you.
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A Suggestion for Haunting Activities
Oda Mae Brown
Why don't you go haunt a house? Rattle some chains or something.
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Change and Consistency in Life
Celie
The more things change, the more they stay the same.
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A Final Taste of Freedom
Valerie
Did you enjoy the fresh air, Lisa?
Lisa
Yeah I did, Val. Thanks.
Valerie
Good, cause it's the last time you're leaving the ward.
Lisa
Is that a dare or a double dare?
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Hair Transformation Surprise
Oda Mae Brown
Damn, baby! What you do to yo hair?!
[possessed by Orlando; stares at his wife Ortisha]
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Recognition and Frustration in Rat Race
Vera Baker
I knew I recognized you, you're the referee, the bonehead!
[to Owen]
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Miscommunication Among Characters in Soapdish
David Barnes
I was under orders.
Celeste Talbert
So - was - ]! Oh, no, I don't mean Hitler, I mean the other guy, the other one.
[[Adolf Hitler|Hitler]
David Barnes
].
[[Heinrich Himmler|Himmler]
Celeste Talbert
No, no, no.
David Barnes
].
[[Rudolf Hess|Hess]
[[Adolf Eichmann|Eichmann]
David Barnes
Eichmann.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Embracing the Excitement of Deception
Vera Baker
Oh good! A scam!!
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The Divine Desire for Appreciation and Acknowledgment
Shug
More than anything God loves admiration.
Celie
You saying God is vain?
Shug
No, not vain, just wanting to share a good thing. I think it pisses God off when you walk by the color purple in a field and don't notice it.
Celie
You saying it just wanna be loved like it say in the Bible?
Shug
Yeah, Celie. Everything wanna be loved. Us sing and dance and holla just wanting to be loved. Look at them trees. Notice how the trees do everything people do to get attention... except walk? Oh, yeah, this field feels like singing! Oh Miss Celie, I feels like singing!
[they laugh]
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Conflict Over Celie's Departure to Memphis
Shug
Celie is coming with us.
Albert
What?
Shug
Celie is coming with us to Memphis.
Albert
Over my dead body.
Shug
You satisfied? That what you want?
Albert
NOW what's wrong with you?
[to Celie]
Celie
You a low down dirty dog, that's what's wrong. Time for me to get away from you and enter into Creation. And your dead body'd be just the welcome mat I need.
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Turtles with Ninja Skills Explained
Vernon
So they're aliens?
April O'Neil
No, that's stupid. They're turtles.
Bernadette Thompson
Is there anything else we should know about them?
April
They're ninjas.
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Actors' Views on Playing Coma Roles
Rose Schwartz
Actors don't like to play coma. They feel it limits their range.
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Embracing Existence Against All Odds
Celie
I'm poor, black; I may even be ugly. But dear God! I'm here! I'm here!
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Regret Over a Missed Squirrel Purchase
Vera Baker
We should've bought a squirrel.
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Suspect's Safety is Non-Negotiable
Katie Coltrane
You cannot eat our only suspect!
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Unexpected Revelations in a Chaotic Situation
Eric Sachs
I'm going to be rich! Like, stupid rich!
Karai
We know you're out there! If you don't surrender, we start executing hostages!
Taylor
Mom, can I move back home?
Bernadette Thompson
There are four 6-foot talking turtles walking around New York City, and no one has seen them but you?
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.