Memorable Quotes from Yeardley Smith
7 quotesDesperation in a Dangerous Situation
Lloyd
Tapes are not going to be enough.
Billie Jean
What do you mean?
Lloyd
I mean they don't have to give you the money, they'll just hunt you down and catch you. Cops don't have to bargain with you, you don't have anything they want. Unless you offer them a trade.
Ophelia
Whatever is that boy doing?
Putter
It's a trick, I saw it on TV.
Billie Jean
What kind of trade?
Lloyd
I'm going to be your hostage, then they have to reason with you. I'm your guarantee.
Putter
Like when you buy a car.
Ophelia
That's a warranty.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Tense Exchange Between Friends
Putter
Far out, I'm coming!
Billie Jean
This is serious, Putter!
Putter
I can be serious, Billie Jean, please I can't stay here without you, I'll just die!
Billie Jean
Go away, Putter!
Putter
Billie Jean said I can come, don't move!
[to Ophelia]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Conversation on Body Image and Perception
Ophelia
Would you look at those tits?
Putter
I think they're gross.
Ophelia
That's because you don't have any.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Perceptions of Taste and Wealth in Food
Binx
What's this?
Putter
I think it's chicken.
Binx
It doesn't taste like chicken.
Ophelia
When you rich, food ain't supposed to taste like what it really is.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Unexpected Visit Brings Trouble for Phil
Nancy
Umm is Mr. Phil Berquist here?
[Shows up at the door during Mitch’s party]
Barbara
Can I get you something to…?
[Nancy walks past her and over to Phil]
Nancy
Mr. Berquist your housekeeper told me where you were. I’m in trouble.
Phil
What are you doing here, Nancy? Who’s on Register 9?
Nancy
I don’t know what to do.
Mitch
Rumaki?
[Holds up a tray next to Nancy]
Phil
I don’t think this is the time or the place to talk about this!
[Becoming anxious]
Nancy
I'm late!
Phil
What?
Nancy
I missed my period!
Mitch
Whoops.
Phil
What!?
Nancy
I was at work and on my break and I took one of those home pregnancy tests from Aisle 11.
Phil
The ones on special?
Nancy
Yes, and it came up blue!
Arlene
Why is she telling you this, Phil?
Phil
Because... because I'm her boss! And... we have a health plan!
[Embarrassed]
Arlene
You son of a bitch, you screwed this little girl in my father's store!?
Phil
No, no, no!
Nancy
It was in his car!
Phil
Oh, Jesus.
Nancy
And I'm not a little girl, I'm 20.
Arlene
Get out of this house, you little whore!
Phil
Hey! I will not permit you to talk to her that way.
Arlene
Fine. I'll tell my father what you did!
Phil
No, do not call Mr Levine! Hey! Put down that phone!
[struggles to take the phone from her and the phone jack is torn from the wall]
Mitch
That’s my phone!
Arlene
You're crazy!
Phil
That's right - not having sex for 12 years will do that to a person!
Mitch
Stop it.. come on, not in front of your friend’s..
[Trying to break them up]
Arlene
I’m not afraid of you! I'll call from the bedroom.
[let’s go of the phone and leaves the room]
Phil
The bedroom? How the hell would you know where the bedroom is?
Arlene
I'm calling...
[from the other room]
Phil
Go ahead, call him, I'm sure he's home! It's his night to meet with the other escaped Nazis!
Arlene
I hate you!
Phil
I hate you more! If hate were people, I'd be China!
Mitch
Let's bring out the cake!
[awkward pause]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Setting the Record Straight
Billie Jean
I'm Billie Jean Davy, and I wanna set the record straight.
[on TV]
Ringwald
Oh my God!
Policeman #1
Wow!
Billie Jean
I'm not a liar, I'm not a thief, and neither is my brother.
Binx
Hello, ma!
[cuts in]
Billie Jean
Sorry, that is him. Mom, I don't know when we'll be comin home, but we love you. I know people are making up stories about us. Don't you believe them. As for you, Mr. Pyatt. You are so sleazy.
[shoves Binx aside]
Putter
YEA!
[cheers on camera]
Billie Jean
You think you can do anything you want and then lie about it and we just have to take it, because what are we? Just a bunch of kids. Well not this time. From now on we're doin this our way. No lyin', no cheatin', fair is fair.
Kid #1 in Crowd
Alright!
[at electronics store watching TV]
Billie Jean
$608 dollars for the scooter your son trashed. That's what you owe, and we're NOT turnin ourselves in til we get it. Fair is fair! We didn't start this, we didn't mean it to happen, but we're not givin up til you pay. FAIR IS FAIR!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Joan of Arc: Victory and Tragedy
Putter
Is that a boy or a girl?
Lloyd
Girl, Joan of Arc. She dressed up as a man and led the French in fighting the English. She heard voices, stop being a peasant', France needs you', the truth needs you'. And she won, she beat the English, but then...
Putter
Then what?
Lloyd
The French, burnt her, alive!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.