A Suggestion for Uncle's Illness
Titta:
Uncle's not feeling good.
Aurelio Biondi:
Then take him to the whorehouse.
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Locked Gate Inquiry
Aurelio Biondi:
Miranda. Miranda! Who locked the gate?
Miranda Biondi:
I did.
Aurelio Biondi:
Why?
Miranda Biondi:
You know why.
Aurelio Biondi:
Unlock it. You've heard what's been going on in the piazza all day. Open up. I have business to take care of.
Miranda Biondi:
Nothing doing. You're staying at home. What's all this stuff? If I wanted to be a widow, I'd kill you myself. I'll strangle you with your neckerchief!
Aurelio Biondi:
Think I'm scared of those black-shirted lice? Give me the key. Give me the key! Miranda! Damn it all!
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The Necessity of Lies in Life
Father Balosa:
Do you tell lies?
Titta:
I have to!
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Escalating Tensions in Family Dynamics
Aurelio Biondi:
He's getting worse and worse! They're a pair of little hoodlums! You've brought them up wrong!
Miranda Biondi:
Then you do it! Let's see how well you do! I can't stand any more! I'm going crazy! I'm going mad! I'll kill the whole lot of you! No? No? I'll put strychnine in your soup! That's what I'll do! But I'll kill myself first!
Aurelio Biondi:
Good.
Miranda Biondi:
Right now!
Aurelio Biondi:
Go ahead.
Miranda Biondi:
You'll see!
Aurelio Biondi:
I'll kill myself first!
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Honor and Conflict in Family Relationships
Father Balosa:
Do you honor your father and mother?
Titta:
Yes, but they don't honor me. They beat me.
Father Balosa:
You must annoy them.
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The Perfection of Nature and Its Creator
Aurelio Biondi:
I can stare at an egg for hours, wondering how nature can make things so perfect.
Miranda:
Cause it was God who made nature, not an ignoramus like you!
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A Title Suggestion for Mortar's Poem
Construction Worker:
Mortar, let the boss hear your poem.
Aurelio Biondi:
Let's hear it. What's it called?
Mortar:
Bricks.
Aurelio Biondi:
Good title!
Mortar:
My grandfather made bricks. My father made bricks. I make bricks too. But, where's my house?
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Unexpected Discoveries in Conversation
Titta:
I didn't know people kissed like that. Did you? With their tongues going in and out?
Father Balosa:
I'll ask the questions here.
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Exploring Temptation and Guilt in Youth
Father Balosa:
Do you commit impure acts? Do you touch yourself? Do you know Saint Louis weeps when you touch yourself?
Titta: [to himself]
Let him cry. I'm not gonna tell you, because you'll only tell Dad. Don't tell me you don't touch yourself. How can you not, when you see the woman in the tobacco shop, as stacked as she is and she says... Export brand? And the math teacher who looks just like a lion? Mother of God! How can you avoid touching yourself when she looks at you that way?
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Drifting Conversations in a Small Town
Giudizio:
In our town, the puffballs and spring arrive hand in hand. These are the sort of puffballs that drift around, soaring over the cemetery, where all rest in peace, soaring over the beachfront and over the Germans, newly arrived, who don't feel the cold. Drifting, drifting... swirling... swirling... swirling... Drifting, drifting, drifting!
Gina:
You think my fanny's a good-luck charm?
Patacca:
Are you Polish? Only Polish women have that fire in their eyes.
Patacca:
I always find German women to be pushovers. She's really fallen for me. And to prove it, she even offered me posterior intimacy.
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Wisdom from Grandpa on Staying Fit
Grandpa:
My father's father used to say, "To be fit as a fiddle, you have to piddle. To be fit as a frog, pee like a dog.
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The Importance of Eating at Specific Times
Grandpa:
So when I was little, he taught me to eat at 11:00 in the morning, before the sun burns your head, and at 4:00 in the afternoon. Otherwise food is like poison that gets into your blood.
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Legacy of Longevity and Vitality
Grandpa:
My father's father was known as "Big Meat." He lived to be 107 and he was still doing it!
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Contemplating Existence and Absence in Death
Grandpa: [Standing outside in a fog]
Where am I? I don't seem to be anywhere. If death is like this, I don't think much of it. Everything's gone. People, trees, birds, wine. Well, up yours!
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Anticipation of Spring's Arrival
Gradisca:
But winter's dying and spring is on its way. I can feel it all over me already!
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Yearning for Lasting Connection and Affection
Gradisca:
I want one of those long encounters that last a lifetime. I want a family, children, a husband to chat with in the evenings over coffee, maybe, and to make love with now and then, because when you must, you must. But affection is even more important than love. I'm so full of affection. But who can I give it to? Who wants it?
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Aurelio Biondi's Perspective on Life's Humor
Aurelio Biondi:
What are you crying about? It's one big laugh riot!
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The Burden of Daily Struggle
Aurelio Biondi:
I get up at 4:00 am and slave away all day like a mule, and when I come home for a crust of bread, I find a bunch of long faces!
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Contemplating the Stars and Their Foundations
Aurelio Biondi:
Look how many there are. Millions and millions and millions of stars. Jesus Christ! I wonder how they all stay in place up there. I mean, it's pretty simple for us. To build a house, we use so many bricks, so much lime. But up there, sweet Jesus! Where do you put the foundations? They aren't just confetti, you know.
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Questioning Paternity in Amarcord
Aurelio Biondi:
Tell me, who's the father of this piece of shit?
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