Angela's Ashes (2000) - Quotes

Griffin: [''Speaking to Frank''] You useless great lump, living free under me roof with you snotty-nosed pack of brats. You. Go to the shop for a few sods and some kindling. Come on. Or are you as useless as your mother? Did you empty the chamber pot today?

Angela: Frankie, will you shut the door?

Malachy: Let's go.

Frank: Right. Let's go. Malachy, the wheel's all bockety.

Malachy: Kaiser Bill marched over the hill

Frank: Shut up, will you?

Malachy: To fight the British Army They're all going to know we got the eviction.

Frank: [''Narrating''] Will you be quiet? And so Malachy, Michael, Mam, and me... moved into mom's cousin's. Laman Griffin. on the Rosbrien Road.

Laman: Did you get the library books?

Frank: I did.

Laman: Go in the yard and see if there's something else to go on this fire.

Frank: Is that for us?

Angela: No, his lordship upstairs.

Frank: [''Narrating''; [w:stout|bottle of stout] Why ask? It was the same every week- one steak, four potatoes, an onion, and a ].

Angela: Frankie, are you back? Will you take up the books?

Laman: Good boy, Frankie. Put them on the bed there. Angela, the chamber pot is full. Is there anything else your lordship would like? Woman's work, Angela. Woman's work and free rent.

Frank: I'll empty it.

Laman: You will? Okay, Frankie. Take it outside and rinse it under the tap. And from now on, that will be your job.

Frank: [[w:turnip|turnip; ''Frank realizes it's another priest, a young man, then sits up more stiffly and seriously''] Paddy Clohessy found a priest to confess our hideous sins to. He's 90 years old and deaf as a ]. Bless me, Father, for I have sinned. It's been ages since me last confession. I've been masturbating. Except one day, he died and didn't tell us. Bless me, Father, for I have sinned. It's been a fort- It's been a fortnight since my last confession.

Priest: And what have you done since then, my child?

Frank: I, uh, I hit my brother. I lied to my mother.

Priest: Yes, my child. And what else?

Frank: Uh, I did dirty things, Father.

Priest: [[w:Zoophilia|Or with some class of beast] Ah, my child, was that with yourself or with another? ]?

Frank: [''Voice of thought''] Beast? I never heard of a sin like that, Father. This priest must be from the country. He's opening up new worlds for me.

Church sermon: [[w:Mary, mother of Jesus|Virgin Mary; [w:Masturbating|Interfering with themselves] I say again, impurity. Impurity is so grave a sin... the ] turns her face away and weeps. She weeps when she looks down... that long, dreary vista of time... and beholds in horror the spectacle of Limerick boys... defiling themselves, polluting themselves, soiling their young bodies which are the temple of the Holy Ghost. ].

Narrator: We pray to the virgin Mary to say we're sorry, because we can't stop interfering with ourselves.

Boy 1: The dong!

All 5 boys: The dong!

Boy 2: The prick!

All 5 boys: The prick!

Boy 3: The dick!

All 5 boys: The dick!

Boy 4: The langer!

All 5 boys: The langer!

Frank: The excitement!

All 5 boys: The excitement!

A boy: The excitement?

Frank: Yeah!

Father O'Halloran: [[w:Arapaho|Arapaho; [w:Cheyenne|Cheyenne; [w:Chippewa|Chippewa; [w:Sioux|Sioux; [w:Apache|Apache; [w:Iroquois|Iroquois; [w:Kicking-Bear|Kicking Bear; [w:Rain-in-the-face|Rain-in-the-face; [w:Sitting Bull|Sitting Bull; [w:Crazy Horse|Crazy Horse; [Geronimo; Holds up his portrait with a grinning face; [wiktionary:Resplendent|resplendent] America, wonderful land of the ], ], ], ], ], ], poetry boys. and the chiefs! Listen. ], ], ], ], and the man himself, the great ]. Stock your minds boys and you can move through the world. Resplendent. Clarke, define "]".

Clarke: I think it's shining, sir.

Father O'Halloran: [[wiktionary:Pithy|Pithy] ], but adequate. McCourt, give us a sentence with "pithy".

Frank: Clarke is pithy but adequate, sir.

Father O'Halloran: Adroit, McCourt. You have a mind for the priesthood, my boy, or politics. Tell your mother to come and see me.

Uncle Pa Keating: [''boys giggle''] Jesus, I said to meself, I have so much gas in my system, tis a great pity to waste it. So I shove a pipe up my arse, light a match to it... ...and there I have a fine flame ready to boil water in any billy can. The English come from trenches... to pay me any amount of money to boil their water.

Aunt Aggie: That's no story to be telling in the presence of a dead child.

Grandma Sheehan: Tis better than sitting with a long face.

Uncle Pa Keating: [[w:Paris|Paris] I made so much money in the trenches that I was able to bribe the generals, who didn't normally give a fiddler's fart about the Irish, to let me out of the army, and off I went to ], where I had a fine time drinking wine... with the models and artists and talkin the lingo.

Aunt Aggie: You think that's funny, do you?

Uncle Pa Keating: I had a great time over there.

Obese woman: [[w:Mutton|the lovely leg of lamb] Come in for ]. And the gorgeous green peas and the flowery potatoes.

Frank's father: Oh, shut up, will you woman? It's a low class mind to torment your neighbors when there's nothing but bread and tea we have.

Obese woman: Get off to work in England like the rest of our husbands.

Frank: Go and help England win a war? I wouldn't give the English the steam off my pish.

Obese woman: No, You'd rather drink the dole, and watch your sons run around all skin and bone, with their arses hanging out their trousers!

Frank: [[w:Secondary school|secondary school; [w:University|university] Hoppy O'Halloran told Mam... to take me to the Christian Brothers, to say he sent me, and I was a bright boy... and ought to be going to ]... and maybe to ] even. I wish he'd mind his own business. I want to quit school forever and get a job with wages every Friday night... I want to quit school forever and get a job with wages every Friday night... and go to the pictures every Saturday like everybody else.

Angela: I've come to see Brother Murray.

Frank: I don't know why we bothered. They took one look at us...

Church man: What do you want?

Angela: [''Man immediately closes door''] This is my son Frank.

Frank: And said no.

Angela: Francis, will you listen to me? Are you listening?

Frank: I am.

Angela: You're never to let anybody slam the door in your face again. Do you hear me?

Frank: I do.

Teacher: [[w:Jesus|Our lord] Do I hear sneering in this class? Do I hear jeering at another's misfortune? Is there any boy in this class who thinks he's perfect? If so, raise your hands. Is there any boy here now who has money galore to be spending on shoes? Raise your hands. No. There are boys in this class who have no shoes at all and it's not their fault. It's not their shame. ] died shoeless! You don't see our lord hanging on the cross sporting shoes! Do you boys?

Class: NO, SIR!

Teacher: What don't you see our lord doing, boys?

Class: Hanging on the cross sporting shoes!

Teacher: Hanging on the cross sporting shoes, WHAT?!

Class: Hanging on the cross sporting shoes, sir!

Teacher: [[w:United States|America] You little hooligan. Is this the kind of behavior you brought from ]? Is it? Well, you come on with me. I'll put the fighting out of you boy.

Teacher: You're a bad yank aren't you, McCourt? What are you?

Frank: [[w:Stereotypes of Americans|They said we were cowboys and gangsters] ], sir.

Boy: I was only joking sir.

Teacher: [[w:yank|yank] No more jokes. It's not his fault that he's a ].

Boy: T'isn't sir.

Teacher: [[w:Al Capone|Al Capone] You should go down on your knees every night and give thanks to god that you're not a yank. If you were, ] would be coming to you for instruction.

Frank: He says ordinary water and don't go on bothering him again!

Grandma Sheehan: [[w:Pejorative|bogtrotter] Bothering him"?! The ignorant old ]!

Grandma Sheehan: [[w:holy water|Holy water] ] or ordinary water?

Frank: He didn't say, Grandma.

Grandma Sheehan: Well, go back and ask him!

Frank: [''In confessional box''] Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned. It's been a minute since my last confession.

Confessional Priest: A minute? Are you the boy that was just here?

Frank: [''Confessional Priest sighs''] I am Father. My Grandma says holy water or ordinary water?

Frank: In the name of The Father and of The Son and of the Holy Ghost. Bless me, Father, for I have sinned. It's been a day since my last confession. A day?

Confessional Priest: And what sins have you committed in a day, my son?

Frank: I overslept, and I nearly missed my First Communion. My hair stuck up like a Protestant's, and I threw up my First Holy Communion breakfast. Now me grandma says she has God in her backyard and what shall she do?

Confessional Priest: Tell your grandma to wash it away with a little water.

Frank: [[w:James Cagney|James Cagney] Mam, can I go now and make the Collection? I want to go to the Lyric to see ].

Grandma Sheehan: [Frank runs out tp the backyard and vomits] You can't make the Collection until you've had a proper First Communion breakfast at my house. Mam. Will you look at him? The manners of a pig. He eats like a Presbyterian. Is it a millionaire you think I am? An American? Is there any more tea in the pot, Mam? - Aye. - I could do with a cup. You all right, Frankie? - What's the matter, Frankie? What's wrong with that child? Look what he did! He's thrown up the body and blood of Jesus. What am I to do? I have God in me backyard! I'm taking you to the priest. That was a dreadful thing you did in my backyard.

Grandma Sheehan: [''Washing a Frank's ear''; [w:Northern Ireland|This is North of Ireland hair you got from your father] Wake up! Wake up! His First Communion, the happiest day of his life, and the lot of you still snoring in there! Here, you two, get up! Go on! Look at him! A bar of soap wouldn't be lost on him. I'll be red raw. I swear it's the Northern Ireland in you. It attracts the dirt. You've the dirty gob of your father. Aah! That's cold. Jesus, you have enough dirt in your ears to grow potatoes! Will you look at that mop?! It won't lie down! You didn't get this hair from our side of the family! ]! It's like, like what you'd see on a Presbyterian!

Frank: Will you stop spitting on me?

Grandma: [''Repeatedly''] A little spit won't kill you! If your mother had married a proper, decent Limerick man, you wouldn't have stand-up, North of Ireland, Protestant hair. And we wouldn't be late! Corpus Christi!

Frank: Oh, look, I'll take one of these as well. In the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Ghost. Bless me, Father, for I have sinned. This is my first confession.

Confessional priest: Yes, my child. And what sins have you committed?

Frank: I told a lie, I hit my brother, I stole a penny from my mother's purse, and I ate a sausage on Friday.

Confessional priest: Yes, my child, anything else?

Frank: I listened to dirty things about girls from the lanes... who don't care what they do because they because they've already done it with their brothers.

Confessional priest: And who told you these things?

Frank: Mikey Molloy, Father.

Confessional priest: Hmm. For your penance, say three Hail Marys, three Our Fathers, and say a special prayer for me.

Frank: Am I one of the worst boys, Father?

Confessional priest: No, my child. You have a long way to go.

Mikey: [[w:breast|have great floppy things called titties; [w:areola|And at the end of them, great red things like dogs' noses; [w:Penis|a mickey] Now, on top, the girls ]. ]. And down at the bottom, now that's an entirely different matter. They don't have ] down there.

Frank: What do they have?

Mikey: I can tell you, but I don't think he should hear it.

Frank: [''Mikey leans forward to whisper in Frank's ear''] Malachy, go away. Eww! Yuck!

Angela McCourt: [[w:Industrial Revolution|the English factories.] If I were able I would go to work in ]

Malachy: Factory's no place for a woman Angela.

Angela McCourt: Sittin’ on your arse is no place for a man Malachy.

Griffin: [''To Angela''; [w:cigarette|fag] Give me a ], woman. I'm telling you, that boy is a little shite!

Priest: [''Puts a wafer on Frank's tongue''] Will you stop your clucking and get back to your seat?! Corpus Christi.

Dance instructor: [''At dancing lessons''] Would you stop the frowning, McCourt?! You've a face on you like a pound of tripe!

Angela: We all miss Malachy. He's, uh, miss him? He... He's gone to join the army band! Playing the bugle. The bugle? Can you imagine that, playin the bugle? Playin the fool, more like.

Grandma Sheehan: [''Frank throws up [[w:First Communion|his communion breakfast] I've got God in me backyard!

Frank: [[w:Limerik|Limerick; ''Throws ledger book into [[w:River Shannon|the River Shannon] Everyone I know and half the poor of ] are here. They all owed the old bitch money. Well, not anymore.

Frank: [''Frank is in bed watching his mother, who is also watching him as she starts stepping up the stairs in Laman Griffin's residence''] I thought mam would come and kiss me good night, to say thank you for sticking up for her. But no, she went to him.

Frank: Also, Mikey is the expert in the lane on girls bodies... and dirty things in general.

Frank: [''[Frank is lying in bed recovering from fever in hospital and a doctor sitting near him has farted''] And then Dr. Campbell came in and held my hand. It was then that I knew I was going to get better because a doctor would never fart in the presence of a dying boy.

Frank: [''Commenting on [[w:Irish dance|traditional Irish dancing; [w:celebrity worship|I want to be; [w:Fred Astaire|Fred Astaire] If my mates saw me making a pure eejit out of myself at the Irish dancing, I'd be disgrace forever. ] ]. Irish dancers look like they have steel rods stuck up their arses.

Frank: In the name of the father, the son and the holy toast.

Frank: [[w:Culture of the United States|If I were in America, I could say "I love you, dad", the way they do in the films; [w:Limerick|Limerick] ]. But in Limerick they'd laugh at you. In ] you are only allowed to say you love God, and babies, and horses that win. Anything else is softness in the head.

Frank: [''Ship is sailing out of [[w:New York City|New York City] We must've been the only Irish family to be saying good bye to the statue of liberty rather than hello.