32 quotes
Derek's Concerns About Planetary Intruders
Derek
What are you dirty hooers doing on my planet?
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Derek's Determined Threat to His Foes
Derek
I'm coming to get you bastards.
[laughs in a mad way]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Confronting Threats with Direct Action
Barry
What are we gonna do if we're spotted, Frank?
Frank
Well... I guess we shoot the bastards.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
The Dangers of Hostile Aliens
Barry
Why can't aliens be friendly?
Derek
There's no glowing fingers on these bastards. We've got a bunch of Extra-Terrestrial psychopaths on our hands. Like a... like a visit from a planet full of ]. They've wiped out a small town for starters, it's my guess they'll go onto something bigger next time. Christchurch, Wellington...
[[w:Charles Manson|Charlie Mansons]
Barry
Auckland?
Derek
Yeah, well that wouldn't be so bad.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Preparation of Gruel is Complete
Lord Crumb's Voice
I think the gruel is ready!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Intergalactic Burgers Made from Human Meat
Taglines
Human meat for intergalactic hamburgers
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Derek Describes an Intergalactic Encounter
Derek
Stay where you are then, and I'll give you an eye witness description of this, intergalactic wanker!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Confronting the Astro-Bastard's World Domination Plan
Derek
Well this sure has buggered your plans for conquering the world, eh? Hehe... my friend, the astro-bastard, time for talkies. By the time my colleagues get here I want to have you babbling in some extra-terrestrial language!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Crumb's Crunchy Delights in Bad Taste
Taglines
Crumb's Crunchy Delights.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Derek's Stance on Running
Derek
I'm a Derek. Dereks don't run!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Weekend Cowboys Meet Their End
Lord Crumb's Voice
That's the end of those weekend cowboys!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Sinus Relief Comment by Ozzy
Ozzy
I bet that cleared the sinuses.
[after shooting the alien that was about to execute Giles in the head]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Authorized Violence for Earth and Moon Protection
Frank
Just remember, we're only authorized to use violence when protecting the planet.
Barry
And the moon.
Frank
Yeah, and the moon.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Derek confronts aliens in Bad Taste
Taglines
Watch out Aliens... ... here comes Derek!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Frustrated Exclamation from Lord Crumb
Lord Crumb's Voice
Oh, sod it!
[after trying to fire on Barry with an empty gun]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Bold Declaration of Defiance
Derek
Eat lead sucker!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Collecting Brain Bits in a Bag
Derek
Stick all the bits of brain in a plastic bag, Barry.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Derek Stands Firm Against Alien Threat
Taglines
One thing the aliens hadn't counted on was Derek, and Dereks don't run!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Unexpected Revelations and Unpleasant Experiences
Frank
oh christ, you'll never believe what i had to do!
Ozzy
umm... did you have to drink some chuck?
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Gun and Personality Disorder Considerations
Frank
Well, I guess we'll have to issue a gun to Ozzy.
Barry
Yeah, but don't forget about his personality disorder.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Tragic Loss on the Journey Back
Lord Crumb's Voice
The sad news is that we will be heading back to nalak not with six of our co-workers in a state of permanent death. They died today, murdered by some real arseholes.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Defiant Challenge in Bad Taste
Derek
Suck my spinning steel, shithead!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Departure from a Dismal Planet
Lord Crumb's Voice
I'm sure you'll be pleased to be leaving this shitty planet!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Promise of Culinary Plans
Lord Crumb's Voice
Tomorrow we're having you for lunch!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Derek's Declaration of Renewal
Derek
I'm born again!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
The Persistence of Old Magic
Ozzy
The old magic is still there.
[after drop-kicking an alien's head out of a window]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
The Arrival of the Invaders
Taglines
The Bastards Have Landed!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Invasion Alert from Ozzy
Ozzy
The bastards have landed!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
The Effectiveness of a Headshot
Derek
The headshot's the only true stopper.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Debate on a Possible Threat
Derek
I think you better kill him Barry.
[on the radio]
Barry
Jeez, he could be Ministry of Works or something.
Derek
Nah, he's moving too fast.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Disappearance Sparks Conspiracy Theories Among Friends
Frank
This isn't gonna be another false alarm like the Manor Street invasion over there, is it?
Derek
Well, how do you explain the disappearance of an entire township, Frank? Oh! The Kiwi Jonestown, of course, that's it! Drinking beer laced with cyanide from little polystyrene cups.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Conversation on Mortality and Taste
Barry
I think Derek's turned his toes up, guys.
Coldfinger
I think this is a job for real men!
Lord Crumb
Mmmhh, exquisite bouquet, Robert!
[Sniffing on bowl of alien vomit produced by Robert]
Lord Crumb
Aren't I lucky, I got a chunky bit!
[drinking bowl of alien vomit]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.