Beethoven (1992) - Quotes

Family Leadership and Responsibility

Taglines: The head of the family is the one with the tail.

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

A New Companion Will Change Your Life

Taglines: He'll grow on you.

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Animal Experiment Preparation Scene

Vernon: Nice dog, huh, Doc? He's perfect for the animal experiment.

Dr. Varnick: Get everything ready. I'll be by in the morning. We'll do the test on him first thing.

Harvey: Sure thing.

Harvey: Okay, good doggie. Good doggie. OK, close the door. Close the door.

Vernon: I've got him. Come on!

Harvey: Good doggie. Come here, doggie. Come on!

Harvey: Okay, I got him. Good, good. I got him. Come on, doggie.

Vernon: Not you! Not you! The dog!

Vernon: Put him in. Okay, you got him? In the cage. Get in.

Vernon: SHUT UP!! There. Doc will work on him first thing in the morning, and then he's one dead puppy.

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Conflict Over Dog and Family Dynamics

George: I really don't like our dog.

Alice: I really don't like those people, George. I don't trust them. I don't want their money. I know my opinion doesn't matter, but I'm not interested in expanding. If I had been home instead of helping you impress those morons, Emily wouldn't have fallen in the pool. And I'm not re-entering the work force, George. You're gonna have to do this on your own. And you will. Somehow, you'll make your fortune. And tucked away behind you deep in the shadows will be me and the kids.

George: That's how you see me. Suddenly, I'm a lousy husband and father. Everything was just fine until Beethoven came into our lives. I've tried to be patient, but I've had it. The dog has to go.

Alice: [heads back inside] I'm proud of Beethoven. Those two idiots insulted your kids, they treated me like dirt, and he was the only one of us who had the nerve to give them the ride they deserved. I'm going to bed.

George: My dream is going down the drain, and you're worried about a dog.

Alice: Your family's going down the drain, and you're worried about a dream.

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

A Request for Parental Communication

Devonia: Now, you were never in any real danger, now, were you? Now, we don't want you to get into trouble, so we'll let this be our little secret.

Ryce: I'd like to call my mother, please.

Devonia: Your mother?

Ryce: Immediately.

Devonia: She must've snuck out while I was watching Ted and Ryce. It was hot out, so I guess she wanted to take a little swim!

Alice: And where were you while all this was happening?

Devonia: I was where I was supposed to be: Inside, watching the other two. If Emily had stayed where I put her, none of this would've happened. If you ask me, what these children need is a little discipline.

Alice: What these children need is their mother. You're fired.

George: Honey, it was an accident!

Alice: So what?

George: We can't just throw out the option of having a babysitter just because we had a bad one. We'll find someone really responsible to look after the kids.

Alice: Over my dead body.

George: Oh, come on.

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Unexpected Revelations at the Padded Zebra

Devonia: [whilst playing the organ; laughs] You kids might be interested to know that I'm a featured performer Saturday nights at the Padded Zebra.

Ryce: Oh, my gosh! Emily's in the pool!

Devonia: The POOL?!!

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Rising Concerns Over Stolen Pets Reported

News Reporter: [[The Wolf Man (1941 film)|The Wolf Man] In the third such occurance this month. In the past year, we've seen a 500% increase reporting innocence of stolen pets. Police believe in animal kidnapping ring is at work. That's Newsbreak, and now back to ].

Alice: Do you hear something?

George: No.

Alice: I heard something downstairs.

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.