13 quotes
Cereal Choice in Morning Routine
Dickie
Cereal? I've been drinking coffee
Grace
Too bad.
Dickie
Fine, cereal it is.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Playful Exchange Between Dickie and a Bully
Bully
Hey!
Dickie
Hey? Don't you mean, "Oink"?
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Humorous Remark About Unusual Hair Color
Dickie
Is that red hair, or did someone light a fart off your mouth?
[''to a bully picking on Sam'']
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Pep Squad Dreams and Dance Memories
Sally
Dickie, you promised to help me with my pep squad tryouts.
Dickie
Oh, I will. That pep squad spot's got your name all over it. Did I ever tell you I was a backup dancer for Vanilla Ice?
Sam
No way!
[''laughs'']
Dickie
Oh, yeah? I owe him a call.
Popeye
Boom.
Dickie
We're right on time.
Grace
-Are you sure? Yep, yep.
Grace
All right.
Dickie
Here we go You got the words down?
Sally
I think so, yeah.
Dickie
I think you do, too I drew this up last night These are your dance steps.
Valeri Perri-Lipson
Okay, girls, come on, let's go It's time to start Our first contestant is Heather Bolan.
Heather Bolan
Hey, Stallions,I got a message for you And it goes like this.
Willa Ford
Oh, I, I, I I wanna be bad with you baby I, I, I, I I wanna be bad with you baby
Heather Bolan
Thank you.
Dickie
Slut.
Valeri Perri-Lipson
Our next contestant, Sally Finney.
Grace
Have fun Just have fun, okay?
Dickie
You're good You know it.
Christopher Cross
It is the night My body's weak I'm on the run No time to sleep I've got to ride Ride like the wind To be free again And I've got such a long way to go To make it to the border of Mexico So I'll ride like the wind Ride like the wind Gonna ride like the wind.
Valeri Perri-Lipson
Oh, that was great!
Dickie
Yeah! That was perfect.
Grace
Sally, I'm so proud of you.
Dickie
Yippee!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Experiencing a Wipeout's Aftermath
Dickie
Whoa! You ever have such a bad wipeout you don't even feel it?
Sam
That wasn't one of them!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Curiosity About Activities in the House
Sally
I wonder what he's doing up there.
[both looking outside at treehouse]
Sam
Who cares, just as long as Stranger Danger's out of our house.
Sally
But still.
Sam
Yeah. It actually looks pretty cool. Is that a disco ball?
Dickie
Woo!
[inside treehouse]
Sally
Seem, maybe we should peek our heads in.
Chic
Ah, freak out
[Dickie Bell rings]
Sam
Okay, let me do the talking.
Dickie
Uh, May I help you? Was I being too loud in my treehouse?
Sam
Um...
Sally
Well, we just wanted to know if we could come up.
Dickie
Can we come up?" All right, you can come up for a little bit, see what you're missing.
Sally
Well, you really fixed this place up, didn't you?
Dickie
Oh, yeah, I did. Put a little lipstick on this pig. But I'm confused, cause you like it now,and I thought the treehouse was a drag. If I took a poll, people would say it sucked. But maybe I'm wrong. Maybe I'm stupid, maybe I'm a dumb-dumb.
Sam
It is kind of cool now.
Dickie
Oh, it's cool now. You hear that? It's kind of cool now.
Sam
Let's go.
Dickie
Wait. Don't leave. You guys can stay. What do you want to do?
Sam
And so the hook hand was hanging there on the car door.
Dickie
Ooh, that was intense.
Sally
Okay, now it's my turn.
Dickie
All right.
Sally
This is the story of the witch of Cloverfield Central School. Once upon a time, there was this witch in school. She was a very, very bad witch. Ha, ha. All the boys liked her, because they didn't know what a bad witch she was.
Dickie
Sally, does this witch have a name?
Sally
Mm... No, not really. Just a witch.
Dickie
Right, and Sally, what does this witch look like?
Dickie
Okay, she dresses very nice, cause her dad has a lot of money. Really hot capris, super tight Zootopia tops.
Dickie
I don't think this is a witch. I think it's Heather Bolan.
Sally
What? That's crazy. Okay, it's Heather Bolan.
Dickie
Huh Huh Oh, you know what, Sally? I don't like her and I've never even met her. Anyone who bugs you can't be good. Now it's my turn. My story is called "The Day the Sitcom Got Canceled." The sky, she was stormy that night. Suddenly, the phone rang. r-r-r-r-r-r-r-rang r-r-r-r-r-r-r-rang r-r-r-r-r-r-r-rang The little boy's mother picked it up. "Hello?" The evil producer on the other end said, "The ratings have hit a six-year low." It gets scarier. "The network is in a panic.
Dickie
Yeah. Here's where it heats up. They didn't have a replacement show. No, no!
Sally & Sam
Come On Guys, Dickie!
[Scream]
Dickie
I know, what are they going to do? What? What's wrong? There's something... Okay, I'll stop. What? No.
Dickie
Don't, don't. Get away. No, get off.
[Dickie Straight In Bed]
Sam
He's having a nightmare.
Sally
He's been talking in his sleep like that for the last hour.
Grace
Dickie?
Dickie
He's getting... Get off. - Don't leave me.
Grace
- Dickie, wake up.
Dickie
No. It's on me. I can't...
Sally
Mom?
Grace
What?
Sam
Do something.
Dickie
No, not again.
Grace
Dickie, wake up. Dickie, wake up. Wake up.You were having a bad dream.
Dickie
Oh, there were these big spiders and they... they were trying to eat me and they jammed their legs down my ear and in my brain, and they were... Mom. ...guts of my head and...
Sam
Come on, Mom, sing it.
Dickie
And there was so many...
Grace
Okay. Dickie, this is what I do for my kids when they're having a nightmare. Hush little baby, don't say a word Mama's gonna buy you a mockingbird And if that mockingbird don't sing Mama's going to buy you a diamond ring If that diamond ring turns brass... Okay. Let's go to bed. It's okay. Good night Grace I See Your Morning
[singing; Sam on Bed Now; Mum Shut A Door; Sally On Your Bed Now]
Dickie
Now, that was probably the nicest thing anyone's ever done for me. You feel bad, and your mom actually tries to make you feel not bad. Wow. By the way, your mom's really hot.
Sam & Sally
- What? - Ew!
Dickie
What, am I wrong? And what's the backyard like? Has she got the G-string going or them big ol grannies with the louvers? I'm betting sweet thong.
Sam & Sally
- Ugh! - Gross! Yuck.
Dickie
Come on, Sam, pretend she's not your mom. Are they real? I think they're real. I bumped into them the other day and it was like "boing," and I was like "boing.
Sam
Dickie, she's our mom.
Dickie
She's my mom, too, and I'm dealing with it somehow. Anyway. Good night, prude people. Dream the dream of prudes. Prude it up. Have a nice G-rated dream full of prudiness.
Sam
Go to sleep, Dickie.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Childlike Excitement Over a Bike
Dickie
Holy shit, a bike!
Rob Reiner
You're six.
Dickie
Holy crap, a bike!
Rob Reiner
You're six.
Dickie
Goo-goo, ga-ga, bikey!
Rob Reiner
Too far back.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Humorous Take on Unique Toilet Experience
Sidney
I may have to go to the bathroom every 45 minutes, but at least I get to pee in a gold toilet.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Comedic Exchange on Absurdity
Rob Reiner
Dickie Roberts This is Nucking Futs! Say It
Dickie
This is Nucking Futs!
Rob Reiner
Hilarious
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Childlike Humor in an Unusual Situation
Grace
This feels a little odd.
Dickie
Dude, I'm the one in the stroller.
Grace
Did you just call me dude?
Dickie
I mean mommy.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Playful Banter About Size and Strollers
Mrs. Gertrude
Aren't you a bit big to be in a stroller?
Dickie
Aren't you a bit big to be on the sidewalk?
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Mastering Fun and Responsibility in Childhood
Sam
Okay, Stranger Danger, this is a Slip n Slide
Sally
If you master this, it's the first step to being a real kid.
Dickie
Great.
Sally
Dickie, there has to be water in it.
Dickie
Oh, that's...
Sam
That's going to leave a mark.
Dickie
That... stings.
Dickie
Good to go.
Dickie
- Yeah, all right.
Sam & Sally
- He did it.
Dickie
That was great. I got something better. Just water is lame. This thing needs a little Wesson-ality.
Sally
Dickie, are you sure about this?
Dickie
Steady. Here we go.
Sally
Oh, shizzit!
Dickie
Ow...! Splinter. That toy is Insane in the membrane Insane, got no brain.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Discussion on Beverage Preferences Among Friends
Sam
Uh, soda, like-like root beer.
Dickie
Well, not a wussy kid. A real kid, all right? You had me at the beer part, but you lost me at root. Now, let's not jump to ] liquor, but something in the middle.
[[malt]
Sally
How about real beer?
Dickie
Whoa, lady. Easy.
Sally
Whoa.
Dickie
Okay, real beer. How many?
Sally
Six-pack?
Dickie
So, you're crazy? A six-pack? Are you a total alkie? Oh, my gosh. How about four? One for you, one for you, and two for me cause I'm kind of a husky kid. Okay, so a six-pack.
Sam
You just said four.
Dickie
Oh, the wussy's taking the minutes of the meeting. Okay, four it is. I'll buy. I'll fly. We have beer.
[Dickie Gets Out A bottle Beer]
Sam
We're not supposed to drink that.
Dickie
What?
Sam
We're supposed to think about drinking beer one day, in the future. It's like, uh, you know,
Dickie
I knew kids that were on TV shows getting whiffed up when they're 16.
Sam
Whiffed up"?
Dickie
Whiff, coke, toot, lines, blast, rails, nose candy, devil's dandruff,power flour, sniffy jiffy, booger sugar. Come on, Sam, the rest of the class is on page 52.
Sally
Dickie, when you're talking to me, all I'm thinking is Brick wall, waterfall. Dickie thinks he got it all, but he don't and I do. So, Boom with that attitude. Peace, punch Captain Crunch. I've got something you can't touch. Bang-Bang choo-choo train. Wind me up, I do my thing. Reeses Pieces, 7-Up. You mess with me, I'll mess you up.
Dickie
Interesting. Whatever. Anyway. By the way, sniffy jiffy, it's no good. Don't do it. Let me tell you something. About this putting stuff off? When I was your age, I did whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted.
Sally
Okay, see, that might be why you're such a mess now.
Dickie
Oh! How dare you. Anyway, check this out. Look, I went ahead and got you your precious root beer. Ooh, I love it.
Dickie
A, B, C, D, E, F, G. "I am Iron Man." I want to bang your mother.
[Dickie Drink A Root Beer]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.