The Journey of Ignorance and Growth
Taglines:
The evolution of dumb.
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High School Misadventures Before the Journey Begins
Taglines:
Before the first movie, there was high school. They missed the bus.
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Return to School with Dimwits
Taglines:
Go back to school with everyone's favourite dimwits.
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Foot Hygiene and Parental Expectations
Jessica:
Wipe your feet. My parents are totally anal!
Harry:
Oh, that's gross!
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Unexpected Consequences of Carelessness
Lloyd:
(He uses Harry as a shield against mud being splattered from a car tire) I got some dirt on my shirt. How gross is this? Harry?
Harry:
(Harry gets struck by car)
Lloyd:
WHOA! Harry? You got to look both ways buddy!
Harry:
(Moans) ...Charlie!
Walter:
Oh my god...it's you! Your that guy that crapped up my house. What are you- your covered in shit! My car is covered in shit! What are you doing? Oh my god! What is wrong with you? You come back here, I'm not cleaning this up! I'm going to have to have this towed. Come back here! Are you out of your mind? What is it with you and fecal matter, look at this!
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Chaos and Confusion in a Messy Bathroom
Harry:
You two timing slut! And you, I thought you were from St. Louis! I don't ever want to see you again!
Walter:
(walks into bathroom to see melted chocolate all over the place) Oh, my God.
Harry:
And I'm leaving! (he does so)
Walter:
(thinks the chocolate is fecal matter) He shit everywhere. THERE'S SHIT EVERYWHERE! DAMN IT!!! THERE'S SHIT ON THE WINDOWS! OH MY GOD! MY HOUSE IS FULL OF SHIT!! HE SHIT EVERYWHERE!! LOOK WHAT HE DID! HE SHIT ALL OVER THE WALL! GET UP HERE!
Jessica:
When can I see you?
Lloyd:
Uh, how about tonight at eight?
Walter:
MY HOUSE IS FULL OF BILE! SHIT!! (to his wife) Calm down! Just calm down!
Jessica:
Th-Thank you Lloyd, I got to go. I got to go for a little peek, see you at eight!
Lloyd:
Date with Jessica, YEAH!
Walter:
Look what he did! He shit all over the wall!
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Misunderstanding in a Conversation
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Butter Preferences and Introductions in Conversation
Walter:
You like your butter, huh? We have some margarine if you want, you can just scoop it out of the tub.
Harry:
No I'm fine, thank you.
Jessica's Mom:
Oh, hello.
Walter:
This is uh...Harry.
Jessica's Mom:
You know, they make that in a womens suit to! (Harry covers himself a little with the jacket)
Walter:
Jessica were eating!
Jessica:
Meet me at the front door Lloyd.
Jessica's Mom:
Well I see you like my rolls.
Harry:
Sure, I like a women with some meat on her bones. So Charlie, what business you in?
Walter:
The names Walter.
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A Compliment Unexpectedly Shared
Lloyd:
You have beautiful eyes!
Harry:
You have beautiful eyes!
Jessica:
Thank you.
Lloyd: [sees a dog]
Hey, where'd you come from?
Harry:
Hey where'd you come from?
Jessica:
I was born in St. Louis.
Lloyd:
Would you like me to pat your head?
Harry:
Would you like me to pat your head?
Lloyd:
I bet you want your head scratched.
Harry:
I bet you want your head scratched.
Jessica:
No why, we still have a lot to talk about.
Lloyd: [dog barks at him]
I bet you... Don't you snap at me like that! You're lucky I don't punch you right in the face!
Harry:
Don't snap at me like that! You're lucky I don't punch you in the face!
Lloyd:
Oh, I remember you...how could I forget those big hairy nipples.
Harry:
How could I forget those big hair nipples?
Lloyd:
I can almost smell your stinky fenuter from here.
Harry:
I can almost smell your stinky fenuter from here.
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Unexpected Comments in a Classroom Setting
Women In Museum:
The daddy polar bear was shot by hunter...just like your father!
Ms. Heller:
I'm Ms. Heller the lunch lady...oh, damn! I mean your new teacher! ...Yeah!
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Character's Humorous Observation on Appearance
Harry Dunne:
Good one Captain Rob, he does look like a you-know-what!
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Changing for Meals and Breakfast Exceptions
Harry Dunne:
I changed for dinner, I always change when I eat, except for breakfast and spazz meal.
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Unclear Communication in Everyday Conversations
Harry Dunne:
Then she said something about something.
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Unexpected Feelings and Unanticipated Pain
Harry Dunne: [thinking; is shown to be sitting on a heater; Out loud]
Wow! She's actually making me feel hot. I didn't think the first time would hurt so much... ESPECIALLY IN THE ASS!
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A Simple Game of Tag
Lloyd Christmas:
You're it!
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Lloyd Declares an End to Wedgies
Lloyd Christmas:
Next time Turks handing out wedgies...your not going to get one! Na uh! Were done pal, finito, the end...Auf wiener schnitzel...Mozeltov!
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A Unique Solution to Conflict
Lloyd Christmas:
There's only one way to settle this...make out contest.
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Addressing Personal Issues in Friendship
Lloyd Christmas:
Man you got some serious self issues to work out my pudgy-ugly little friend.
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A Question About Sharing and Relationships
Lloyd Christmas:
So, did you give him some yet? You know some!
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Questioning a Messy Situation
Lloyd Christmas: [after seeing chocolate stains all over Harry]
Harry, why are you covered in poo?
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