31 quotes
Absurdity and Humor in Epic Movie Dialogue
Willy
Who wants to chew my gumballs?
Peter
Monobrow! Monobrow! King wants a monobrow!
Peter
(as Superman) You shot me in the freaking eye! That really hurts! Why would you do that?! That was so unnecessary! You bastard!
Kanye West look-alike
(while Lucy is viewing the camera from Mr. Tumnus) The White Bitch doesn't care about black people.
Samuel L. Jackson look-alike
Shit, bitch, I'm always yelling! I'm Samuel god damn Jackson!
Borat look-alike
Jagshemash! My name-a Borat. You did it! You made moviefilm have happy ending! (the water wheel runs over the orphans) Not!
White Bitch
I hate those fucking kids.
Paris Hilton look-alike
I'm so hot. (yells as she gets crushed by Susan, who was thrown off the plane)
White Bitch
(trying to read) The... keeds... have... esca-puh-duh.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Threat in Latin
Silas
(in Latin) ]. ]. (English subtitles) I'm gonna drop you like ]!
[[w:Habeas corpus|Habeas corpus; [w:E pluribus unum|E pluribus unum; [w:Kevin Federline|K-Fed]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Confrontation in Latin and English
Silas
(in Latin) ]! (English subtitles) I'm gonna go ] on your ass!
[[w:Trinitarian formula|In nomine Patris, et Filii, et Spiritus Sancti; [w:Jackie Chan|Jackie Chan]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Discussion of a Fast Food Location
White Bitch
Behold, my White Castle. (she points to a White Castle restaurant across from them)
Edward
White Castle? I think I've been there before.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Celebrating a Successful Prank on Edward
Ashton Kutcher look-a-like
Yes! (jumps in with camera crew) Yes! You just got Punk'd! Yes! Yes! Yeah, he did it! He did it! C'mere, say it to the camera! Say it to the camera, come on, say it right there! (Edward stutters) Say it!
Edward
I-I just--I just got Punk'd.
Ashton Kutcher look-alike
Ah! Schwow!
Ashton Kutcher look-alike
(making exaggerated moves mocking Ashton Kutcher's "Punk'd" skits) Yeah! We just Punk'd Edward! Schwow! Schwow! Yeah! That was awesome! Yeah! Yes! This thing, up here, it's all me, baby! The trucker hat! That's awesome! I did it! You love it! You'll take it! Punk'd him!
Ashton Kutcher look-alike
*(gibbering excitedly still over the joke) Oh, my gosh, that was really funny! Oh, my gosh! Oh, my gosh! (continues gibbering)
Edward
(yelling in fury) Dude, you are so annoying! (Punches Ashton, knocking him down and shutting him up)
Ashton Kutcher look-alike
(gets up after a few seconds, resuming his gibberish and his crazy movements) But, oh, my gosh! That was really funny! (continues gibbering)
Edward
(keeps punching him; Ashton replies with a "Schwow!" with every punch, until Ashton falls over) Candy-ass trucker hat!
Ashton Kutcher look-alike
(flicks snow up at Edward in a childish manner) Schwow! Schwow....
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Irreverent Comments on Maturity and Behavior
Hermione
Hope you chicks are on the pill. Harry likes to get wasted, then show off his "sorcerer's stones". (farts)
Susan
They are definitely too old to still be doing this shit!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Dance Invitation Rejected
Peter
(to Mystique) Would you like to come to the homecoming dance with me?
Mystique
As if!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Aging Wisdom on Chuck Norris
Edward
(in his old age) Chuck Norris rules.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Unexpected Reactions in a Relationship Moment
Aslo
Where're you going, doll-face? I just took my Cialis!
Aslo's girl
Screw you, Aslo!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Plot Similarity in Epic Movie Dialogue
White Bitch
This crystal will finally put an end to the resistance. I will start a series of earthquakes that will collapse all of Gnarnia and grow a new continent where only I and my followers will live.
Bink
Yo, Bitch, that's pretty much the plot of ].
[[w:Superman Returns|Superman Returns]
White Bitch
Pretty much, yeah.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Unexpected Latin Insult in Epic Movie Scene
Silas
(in Latin) ] (English subtitles) I'm ], bitch!
[[w:Et tu, Brute?|Et tu, Brute?; [w:Rick James|Rick James]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Secret Ingredient in Candy Revealed
Willy
Children, do you wanna know what makes all my candy taste so special?
Edward
Uh-huh.
Willy
It's a special secret ingredient. It's real human parts! There's gonna be a little itty-bitty piece of each and every one of you inside of the yummy yum candy. Literally!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Nacho Libre's Take on Snack Preferences
Nacho Libre
(takes off his robe) Nacho-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o... cheese flavored Doritos are delicious!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Urgent Advice to Leave the Situation
Aslo
Have your Dr. Phil moment later. Now, get out of here!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Misunderstanding Names in a Humorous Encounter
Edward
Captain Morgan! I love your rum.
Captain Jack Swallows
No. Captain Jack Swallows at your service.
Edward
Jack Swallows? That's kind of gay, dude.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Unexpected Consequences of a Compliment
Lauren Conrad
Nice hair, Rogue. (] touches her, causing her to fall to the ground, seemingly dead)
[[w:Rogue (comics)|Rogue]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Playful Expression of Confidence
Silas
(in Latin) ]. ]. (English subtitles) Fo-sheezy, White Beezy.
[[w:Persona non grata|Persona non grata; [Wiktionary:magna cum laude|Magna cum laude]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Plea for Freedom in Captivity
Susan
Let us out, freak!
Lucy
Let us out, freak.
Willy
No, no, no. I can't do that.
Susan
Yes, you can.
Lucy
Yes, you can.
Willy
You're mine now.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Tattoo Mix-Up Leads to Humorous Confusion
Edward
I even got a tattoo with your name on it! (takes off his shirt, exposing what appears to be ]'s tattoo)
[[w:50 Cent|50 Cent]
White Bitch
That looks more like 50 Cent's tattoo, you idiot!
Edward
Shit! They did the wrong one!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Frustration Over Snakes on the Plane
Samuel L. Jackson look-alike
Enough is enough! I have had it with these god damn snakes on this god damn plane!
Susan
So have I!
Samuel L. Jackson look-alike
Enough is enough! I have had it with these god damn snakes on this god damn plane!
Susan
Right!
Samuel L. Jackson look-alike
I have had it with these god damn snakes on this god damn plane!
Susan
Why do you keep saying that?!
Samuel L. Jackson look-alike
Cause Internet bloggers love when I say, "I have had it with these god damn snakes on this god damn plane!
Samuel L. Jackson look-alike
Enough is enough! I have had it with these motherfucking snakes on this motherfucking plane!
Susan
So have I!
Samuel L. Jackson look-alike
Enough is enough! I have had it with these motherfucking snakes on this motherfucking plane!
Susan
Right!
Samuel L. Jackson look-alike
I have had it with these motherfucking snakes on this motherfucking plane!
Susan
Why do you keep saying that?!
Samuel L. Jackson look-alike
Cause Internet bloggers love when I say, "I have had it with these motherfucking snakes on this motherfucking plane!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Unexpected Humor in Epic Movie Scene
Silas
(in ]) Urts-hay oh-say ood-gay! (English subtitles) Beat me like ] beats ]!
[[w:Pig Latin|Pig Latin; [w:Bobby Brown|Bobby; [w:Whitney Houston|Whitney]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Introduction of Gnarnia's Royalty
Harry Beaver
May I present the kings and queens of Gnarnia: Peter, the Heroic; Susan, the Just; Edward, the Loyal; and Lucy, the Dumb-shit! All hail!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Understanding Family Connections in Unexpected Places
Lucy
I don't get it.
Apostle in "The Last Supper
You're all related! Brothers and sisters! You're a family, for Christ's sake! (Jesus rolls his eyes) Sorry.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Unexpected Encounter with a Familiar Face
Edward
(as the White Bitch pulls up in her turbo sled) Whoa, Stifler's mom!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Democracy and Justice in Gnarnia
Peter
(about the frozen White Bitch) The new Gnarnia will be a democracy, complete with due process. She shall be given a fair trial, judged by a jury of her peers.(Jack Swallows comes rolling by on the wooden wheel and runs over the White Bitch)
Captain Jack Swallows
Sorry, Bitch.
Peter
Right. Oh, screw her anyway.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Superheroes Quarrel Over Power and Strength
Cyclops
He's unleashing his powers!
Storm
He's going to spread angel wings!
Mystique
More like chicken wings!
Magneto
Break it up. Break it up. You all know Peter is too much of a pussy to stand up for himself.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Age and Perception in Fantasy Worlds
Harry Potter
Welcome! My name is Harry Potter!
Susan
Aren't you a little old to still be a student here?
Harry Potter
Nonsense. I am but 14. (he looks at least 30) As are my two best friends, Ron and Hermione!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Unexpected Reaction to a Character's Appearance
Edward
* (unrated version) Whoa, MILF!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
The Power of Family Unity
Peter
We may not have the numbers on our side or the weapons she possesses, but we have something far more powerful.
Lucy
Perky breasts?
Peter
The strength of our family!
Edward
I'd follow you anywhere, brother.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Conflict Among Friends in a Dire Situation
Edward
Because we're four kids nobody would ever miss, we'll be stuck here until we die.
Peter
Shut up, Edward, You're scaring her.
Edward
Don't tell me what to do! You're not my father!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Frustration with the plot
Edward
Damn that ] plot!
[[w:Superman Returns|Superman]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.