A Proposition for Payment and Service
Trent:
Nolan! How about I pay, you pump?
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Survival Choices in Extreme Circumstances
Richie:
I get it though, dude, you do what you've got to do to survive, you know? If we were all out here starving to death, and you were, and you were dead, I'd eat your leg.
Amanda:
Really sweet. Yeah.
Richie:
Thank you.
Wade:
Why would you eat my leg, man? I can teach you how to fish, just go fishing.
Richie:
I don't eat fish.
Amanda:
That's not what you told me.
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Casual Banter Among Friends Over Drinks
Richie:
How's that beer treatin ya, beer snob?
Mike:
Better than my own piss.
Wade:
You can drink that by the way. Yours, hers, hers, mine, yours.
Whitney:
What?
Wade:
Swear to God, piss is sterile.
Amanda:
For the record, you will never drink my piss.
Wade:
That's what you think.
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Exploring the Dark History of the Camp
Wade:
Hey guys! Guys! I just found some broken down cabins over there. It's got to be the old camp. Who wants to go check it out?
Mike:
Is this all we brought to drink, no Heineken or anything?
Richie: [[Blue Velvet|Fuck that euro-shit, this is Pabst Blue American Ribbon, my friend.]
]
Wade:
You do realize this camp was closed down like 20 years ago? Some woman, she went fucking nuts, killed all these counselors. Blamed them for her son's drowning, he was like deformed or retarded or something. Mom got hers. Uh, apparently there was one survivor. This girl, she cut that lady's head off with a machete. It gets weirder.
Richie:
I'm sure it does.
Wade:
Her son, Jason, he came back. He was actually there. He watched his mom being beheaded. Actually, a friend of mine, he went to camp around here..
Richie:
Aw, sh..
Wade:
He went to camp around here! He said the cops came, they were looking for that Jason guy. You know what? Don't believe me, nobody does. Don't believe me. But I'm pretty sure the way the story goes, the place was called Camp Crystal Lake.
Richie:
Do you know how many lakes are probably called Crystal Lake? Crystal Geyser, Crystal Water. Go to a supermarket, every single bottle of water is Crystal something.
Wade:
Aquafina.
Richie:
Okay, fine.
Wade:
Okay.
Richie:
The story could've happened anywhere dude, that's how they get little kids to shit themselves.
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A Mother's Revenge for Her Son
Pamela Voorhees:
Come here! Come here now. You're the last one. I've killed all the others. It'll be easier for you than it was for Jason.
Camp Counselor:
Why are you doing this?
Pamela Voorhees:
You need to be punished for what you did to him. You let him drown. Jason was my son.
Camp Counselor:
No! No, please!
Pamela Voorhees:
You should've been watching him. Every minute!
Voice of Pamela Voorhees:
Jason. My special, special boy. They must be punished, Jason. For what they did to you. For what they did to me.
Voice of Pamela Voorhees:
Kill for mother.
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A Moment of Anticipation
Bree:
I'm close, baby!
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A Compliment Amidst Tension
Bree:
Well, you do know how to make a girl feel special, don't you?
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Instructions for Drinking Technique
Bree:
Did you forget how to drink that? Just put it to your lips, blow, and suck.
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Comment on Physical Appearance
Trent:
Your tits are like... so juicy babe!
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Concern Over Online Sharing
Trent:
This better not go on the fucking internet...
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A Compliment on Physical Appearance
Trent:
Your tits are stupendous!
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Conflict Over Family Heirloom
Trent:
I don't care about your damn lip, this is a family heirloom!
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Trent's Provocative Comment on Enjoyment
Trent:
Oh, you like that? You like the balls in your hand, huh?
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Unexpected Reaction to Unusual Situation
Donnie: [sees Jason unmasked]
What the fu-? That shit ain't fuckin right dude!
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Nostalgia and Desire in a Relationship
Donnie: [to mannequin]
It's been a long time, Gina. You remember that special night we had? You remember when you took my virginity? You're sexy. You're still tight as ever. I wanna fuckin pound you so hard.
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Consequences of Ignoring Warnings
Donnie:
It's your fuckin loss, dude! It'll fuck your shit up, boy. Good times. Fucker.
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Unintentional Sales Pitch for Cannabis
Donnie:
I forgot, did you want to buy some weed? Seriously, I sprung a fucking shit-ton of it growing out there, a little bushel. Sell you some.
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Close Call with the Whup-Ass Machine
Donnie:
Jesus Christ! Fuckin lucky there, Stretch! You came about that close to hittin the start button on the whup-ass machine, boy!
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Unlikely Romantic Comparisons in Frustration
Chewie:
Are you kidding? I have a better shot at fucking a penguin than that girl.
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Humorous Misunderstanding of a Nickname
Chewie:
They don't call me the "wood wizard" because I masturbate a lot.
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A Bold Claim About Masculinity
Chewie:
Hey. Now, this is a real man's sport. You're even curved to the left, like my penis.
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Completing the Look with a Statement Piece
Chewie:
Are you looking for this? Because, uh, it completes your outfit.
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Trent's Troubling Childhood Revelation
Chewie:
Hi, my name is Trent. My daddy bent me over this chair and beat me when I was little, so you need to fix it.
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Clichés and Daddy Issues in Relationships
Chewie:
Hey! Here's to daddy issues and fucking douchebags. Let's just all be one big happy cliché!
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Desire for a Different Life Perspective
Chewie:
In my next life, I want to come back as one of the buttons on the asspocket of her jeansshorts.
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Comment on a feline's demeanor
Chewie: [looking at a stuffed bobcat]
That is a fierce pussy.
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A Defiant Statement Against Cowardice
Chewie:
Fine. To all the felching, welching, pussies of the world!
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A Call to Action
Chewie:
Shoot the boot!
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Chewie's Surprising Observation on Uterine Space
Chewie:
Oh my God, babies have more space in the uterus.
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Discovery of a Mysterious Doll
Mike:
There's something in there. Looks like some kind of a doll.
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Cautionary Advice from Wade to Mikey
Wade:
Hey Mikey, wear a condom! An extra small one.
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