Fritz the Cat Quotes

Duke Hey, man, you in a bag?

Fritz Yeah, that's it. I'm in a bag.

Duke Just don't lose your coolness, cat. I mean, don't lose your coolness.

Fritz Well, easy for you to talk. You're a crow. I wish I was a crow. If I was a crow, I'd fly away, man. I'd fly away from this miserable town for good.

Duke You think being a crow is a big motherfucking ball? All you cats the same, man. You don't know where it is. There's nobody to tell you where it's at. And you come up here, try to find out where it's at, but you got to be up here, man, to find out what's happening!

Fritz I know it isn't a ball, man. I studied the race problems. I know.

Duke You don't know nothing about the race problem! You gotta be a crow to know about the race problem! You know what I mean? Do you dig where I'm at? You know what I'm talking about?

Fritz Well, listen, man. this thing affects me very deeply, fella. As a cat, I have a considerable guilt complex, because my kind have always brought suffering on your kind.

Duke Yeah?

Fritz Yeah. Yes, indeed, my soul is tortured and tormented by this racial crisis.

Duke No shit?

Fritz Sometimes I really get hung up about it. You know, uptight. Strung out.

Duke ln a bag?

Fritz Yeah, in a bag.

Narrator Hey, yeah - the 1960s? Happy times, Heavy times.

Winston #1 Why does a great actor like ] always have to play black men?

Crow I ain't no jive-ass black nigga, honey. Who do you think I am, Geraldine?

Aardvark Ever mated with an aardvark? It's a rare opportunity, you know. We're scarce.

Aardvark I'm a failure as a pot smoker.

Pig Cop #1 Now, you have the deeper voice so on three, you yell "Open the fucking door". Now, say the word "fucking" because you got—that makes you sound tough.

Ralph They all got long hair. They all got long clothes. Must be a hippie church!

Newscaster We interrupt the Israel-Arab war for this special announcement! The President, after conferring with Israel Prime Minister Golda Meir, has agreed to send more arms to Israel - based on the return of New York city and Los Angeles to the United States.

Pig Cop #1 You're not supposed to dance, Ralph, cause you're not Jewish!

Duke You think being a crow is a big motherfucking ball? All you cats the same, man! You don't know where it is, and you don't have somebody to tell you where it is. You have to be where it is to find out what's happening!

Ralph Would you like to see a picture of my kids?

Lizard Leader I think I'm gonna ride that goddamn whore!

Officer Eh, poor cat. He was a - he was a kind a tough kid at that, wudden he?

Taglines He's X-Rated and Animated!

Fritz Hey, hey, hey, Look at this big fucking gun! I killed the john! I killed the john!

Harriet Hi.

Fritz How are you?

Harriet High.

Fritz WE SHALL OVERCOME!

Fritz No, I knew that - the engine's not here, it's in the back...

Winston Schwartz What's wrong, Fritz?

Fritz Well, it's all very complicated Winston, ah, I think it's got the piston rod stuck in the drive shaft... either that or the carburator's rusted out... or something.

Fritz My soul is tormented! I've been up and down the four corners of this big old world! I've seen it all! I've done it all! I've fought many a good man, and laid many a good woman! I've had riches and fame and adventure...I've tasted life to the fullest, and still my soul cries out, yes, cries out in this hungry, tortured, wrecked quest: More!

Fritz The love you give is equal to the love you get.

Fritz You're a motherfucking bitch!

Winston I see the hard facts of life! I am realistic, something you're incapable of! You'd be better off with one of those stupid little morons like Charlene who you could just sleep with and throw away when you're done! You can't cope with a mature woman!

Taglines We're not rated X for nothin', baby!

Fritz Why'd you have to hit her so hard for?

Lizard Leader She loved it. Listen man, me and you have been assigned to blow up the power plant. That's all I care about. The Revolution.

Fritz You're full of shit! All you care about is a reason to hurt, to destroy, to blow up!

Taglines SEE! The man eat crow! SEE! The Air Force bomb the ghetto! SEE! Fritz bite off more than he can chew! SEE! Hundreds of dirty animals!

Fritz Revolt! Revolt! Revolt, you thick-skulled idiots! You have carried heavy burdens for the bosses! You have sweat your lives away for the bosses! The bosses! They ride around in limousines!

Crow Get the fuck off my car!

Fritz The Bosses! They're eating strawberries and cream!

Duke That's funny! Cats are real boss!

Ralph (Pig Cop #2) ALRIGHT, WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?! BREAK IT UP!

Duke Cool it, officer. He's just blowing hot air. No one's paying no mind.

Fritz Come the revolution, there gonna be no more limousines! Come the revolution, there gonna be no more strawberries and cream! See?!

Pig Cop #1 Hey, Ralph, you know how these dumb kids are. They don't know what they doing.

Ralph (Pig Cop #2) Fucking "A" right.

Fritz There he is! He's the one who keeps the bosses in power! HE'S THE ONE WHO'S HOLDING YOU DOWN!

Pig Cop #1 Who, me?

Ralph (Pig Cop #2) You!

Pig Cop #1 No, no, not me, YOU!

Ralph (Pig Cop #2) No You!

Pig Cop #1 No You!

Ralph (Pig Cop #2) You, You, You!

Pig Cop #1 Me!

Ralph (Pig Cop #2) Not me, YOU!

Pig Cop #1 Yeah you!

Ralph (Pig Cop #2) You!

Pig Cop #1 Fuck you!

Fritz THE SPIKED BUDDHA CAPITALISM! THE IRON THUMB ON THE HEADS OF THE PROLETERIAT!

Pig Cop #1 They're gonna kill us.

Duke Come on, man! You'll get killed up here!

Fritz I've been up and down the four corners of this big old world. I've seen it all and I've done it all. I've fought many a good man, and I've laid many a good woman and if there's one thing I've learned it's.. it's... it's you get over here and you get down there like that an then you blondie...

Fritz Hello men... everybody all busy studyin for the goddamn exams and all? Hey Fuzz, how'd it go with that Dee Dee chick, huh? She's got some bod you have to admit, heh... ol Charlene isn't bad either though right?... like, wow. Heinz! You swine, ol buddy pig, ya groove behind Alvina and get some kicks tonight, huh? . Bastards... you'd think the goddamn exams were the be-all and, end-all of existence... the cosmic life-force or somethin'. Y'd think they were the frickin fugitives. Can't even get in a few decent words to a guy... bastards... What a bore they just sit there and take bennies an stay up all night with their face stuck in a bunch of books an their thumb up their ass. Oh Yes, yes I remember when the time when it was all very inspiring and enlightening... all this history and literature and sociology shit... You think learning is a really big thing an you become this big fuckin intellectual and sit around tryin ta out-intellectual all the other big fuckin intellectuals... you spend years and years with your nose buried in these goddamn tomes. While the world is passin you by... and all the stuff to see and all th kicks an girls are all out there... an ME, a writer an a poet who should be havin adventures an experiencing all the diversities and paradoxes and ironies of life! And passin over all the roads of the world! An diggin all the cities and towns and rives... and the oceans... and making all of them chicks... As a writer and poet it is my duty to get out there and dig the world... to swing with the whole friggin scene while there's still time! My farting around days are over baby! From this day on I shall live every day as if it was my last! Yeah! Yeah! I must do it! No more the dreary boring classes, the dismal lectures, the sitting around bullshitting with pretentious fat-ass hippies, no more the books, the spoutings of a bunch of old farts who think they know the whole goddamn score! Ha Ha! Heh Heh. Heh. Oh my God! What have I done? Oh...man. I've set all my notes and books and stuff on fire an uh, now I can't study for my exams...An I'll flunk out an my folks'll be pissed off as hell... I-I'll get a blanket... the blanket's on fire. Man we'd better call the fire department.

Ralph (Pig Cop #2) Let me call em ]s!

Pig Cop #1 What's a "prevert"?

Ralph (Pig Cop #2) A prevert is a ]! Didn't you know that?

Pig Cop #1 A prevert's a degenerate?

Ralph (Pig Cop #2) Didn't you have no bringing up?

Pig Cop #1 I got bar mitzvahed.

Fritz Mother of God, I'm a fucking fugitive!