Gosford Park Quotes

Mary Maceachran Nobody can stab a corpse and not know it.

Robert Parks Really? When was the last time you stabbed a corpse?

Henry Denton Who is it?

Lottie Oh, I'm ever so sorry, sir.

Henry Denton Sorry for what?

Lottie I'm supposed to get the fire lit without waking you.

Henry Denton Why does everyone treat me as if I were one of these stupid snobs? I spent half the week downstairs with all of you.

Lottie You can't be on both teams at once, sir.

Lady Sylvia McCordle Where's that wretched Mabel?

Lady Trentham Has anyone checked her outfit? She's probably in black velvet with a feather in her hair.

Lavinia Meredith She's in the morning room looking perfectly normal. Don't be such a snob, Aunt Constance.

Lady Trentham Me? I haven't a snobbish bone in my body.

Henry Denton You Brits really don't have a sense of humor do you?

Elsie We do if something's funny, sir.

Lady Trentham They're rather a mixed bunch. That Mr. Weissman's very odd. Apparently, he produces motion pictures. The Charlie Chan Mysteries. Or does he direct them? I never know the difference. Mary! I suppose it's fun having a film star staying but there's always so little to talk about after the first flush of recognition. And why has Freddy Nesbitt brought that awful common little wife of his? Isabel only asked him because another gun dropped out; that's no excuse to inflict her on us all. Mary... Tomorrow, I'll have breakfast in bed, and then get straight up into the tweeds. What shirt have you brought?

Mary Maceacran The green with the pink stripe.

Lady Trentham Oh no, dear, no. No, that's quite wrong. Always something very plain for country sports, the one I wore today will do.

Mary Maceacran But it's soiled.

Lady Trentham Well, you can wash it, can't you?

Lady Sylvia McCordle Mrs Wilson, a major crisis has arisen. I've just found out that Mr Weissman won't eat meat and I don't know what to do and I can't ask Mrs Croft. I simply don't dare.

Mrs. Wilson Oh, everything's under control your ladyship. Mr Weissman's valet informed us as soon as he arrived so we've prepared a special version of the soup, he can eat the fish and the hors d'oeuvres, there'll be a welsh rarebit for the game course, I'm not sure what we're going to do about the entree but we'll think of something.

Lady Sylvia McCordle Thank you Mrs Wilson. Ten steps ahead as always. Which one of you is Mr Weissman's valet?

Henry Denton I am, your Ladyship.

Lady Sylvia McCordle Are you indeed. Yes. Well. Thank you for your... efficiency.

Lady Trentham He's still got that vile little dog, I see.

Lady Sylvia McCordle Yes, the ones we hate last forever.

Raymond Stockbridge Well I think it's ridiculous. I'm here to shoot.

Louisa Stockbridge Darling, it's a relief to me to sit next to someone who isn't deaf in one ear.

Raymond Stockbridge How's that?

Lady Trentham Tell me, what happened to William's little maid? I never saw her again after that dinner.

Mary Maceachran Elsie?

Lady Trentham Hmm.

Mary Maceachran She's gone.

Lady Trentham Aw, it's a pity, really. I thought it was a good idea to have someone in the house who is actually sorry he's dead.

Mrs. Wilson What gift do you think a good servant has that separates them from the others? It's the gift of anticipation. And I'm a good servant. I'm better than good. I'm the best. I'm the perfect servant. I know when they'll be hungry and the food is ready. I know when they'll be tired and the bed is turned down. I know it before they know it themselves.

Lady Trentham Could you imagine someone being hanged because of something I said?

Mary Maceachran I know. And what purpose could it possibly serve?

Lavinia Meredith I don't care what's changed or not changed as long as our sons are spared what you all went through.

Lady Sylvia McCordle Not all. You never fought, did you, William?

Sir William McCordle I did my bit.

Louisa Stockbridge Of course you did.

Lady Sylvia McCordle Well, you made a lot of money but it's not quite the same as charging into the cannon's mouth, is it?

Henry Weissman How do you put up with these people?

Ivor Novello You forget I earn my living by impersonating them.

Lady Sylvia McCordle Mr Weissman.

Morris Weissman Yes?

Lady Sylvia McCordle Tell us about the film you're going to make.

Morris Weissman Oh, sure. It's called "Charlie Chan In London". It's a detective story.

Mabel Nesbitt Set in London?

Morris Weissman Well, not really. Most of it takes place at a shooting party in a country house. Sort of like this one, actually. Murder in the middle of the night, a lot of guests for the weekend, everyone's a suspect. You know, that sort of thing.

Lady Trentham How horrid. And who turns out to have done it?

Morris Weissman Oh, I couldn't tell you that. It would spoil it for you.

Lady Trentham Oh, but none of us will see it.

Lady Sylvia McCordle What are you wearing?

Isobel McCordle Don't you like it? You bought it.

Lady Sylvia McCordle Did I? How extraordinary of me.

Dorothy I believe in love. Not just getting it, but giving it. I think that if you're able to love someone, even if they don't know it, even if they can't love you back, then it's worth it.

Lady Trentham If there's one thing I don't look for in a maid, it's discretion. Except with my own secrets, of course.