if.... (1969) - Quotes

The Possibility of English in Space

Peanuts: Space, you see, Michael, is all expanding at the speed of light. It's a mathematical certainty that among all those millions of stars, there's another planet where they speak English.

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Paradise and its True Blessings

Peanuts: Paradise is for the blessed. Not for the sex-obsessed.

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A Reflection of Intensity and Fear

The Girl: [to Mick] Go on. Look at me. Look at my eyes. I'll kill you. Sometimes I stand in front of the mirror and my eyes get bigger and bigger. And I'm like a tiger. I like tigers. Rrrrah!

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Headmaster's Appeal for Trust and Understanding

Headmaster: [the Girl pulls out a pistol and shoots him in the forehead] Boys! Boys! I understand you! Listen to reason and trust me! Trust me!

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Critique of British Education System

Headmaster: Education in Britain is a nubile Cinderella: sparsely clad and much interfered with.

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The Power of a Single Bullet

Mick Travis: [deals out Bren gun ammo] One man can change the world with a bullet in the right place. Real bullets.

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Rebellion Against Oppression

Mick Travis: [making a blood pact with Wallace and Knightly] Death to the oppressor!

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Embracing Independence and Self-Reliance

Mick Travis: We're on our own now.

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A Moment of Disappointment and Surprise

Mick Travis: [to Wallace, watching as Knightly is being flogged] Christ, that was a bit low!

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Critique of Hypocrisy and Charity

Mick Travis: [to Rowntree, after being told that he, Wallace and Knightly are to be punished for their behaviour] The thing I hate about you, Rowntree, is the way you give Coca-Cola to your scum and your best teddy-bear to Oxfam and expect us to lick your frigid fingers for the rest of your frigid life.

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Comment on clothing and appearance

Mick Travis: [to Denson, after being told he knows nothing of the school's motto] You mean that bit of wool on your tit?

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Questioning Perceptions of Disruption

Mick Travis: [to Rowntree] What do you mean, being a nuisance? What have we done?

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Reflections on Mortality and Suffering

Mick Travis: [laughs; laughs; laughs; laughs; laughs] The night's dead. You can hardly breathe outside. The thing I'd really hate is to have a nail banged through the back of my neck. Slowly. I don't see what difference the speed makes. The speed of the nail. The -The -The nail's speed! The s-speed.

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The Cruelty of Historical Warfare

Mick Travis: [discussing horrible ways to die] Being flayed alive. That's what the Crusaders did to their enemies. Used to send their neatly folded skins back to their victims wives.

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Questioning the value of a dead man's leg

Mick Travis: [at dinner] Dead man's leg today, Mrs. Kemp. Do you need this, Mrs. Kemp?

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A Call for Authenticity and Experience

Mick Travis: [after receiving an injury on his hand during the fencing duel] Blood! Real blood!

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The Cost of Freedom and Identity

Mick Travis: [quoting [[Rudyard Kipling] What stands, if freedom fall? Who dies, if England live?

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The Harsh Realities of War

Mick Travis: [during a fencing duel with Wallace and Knightly] War... even to the knife!

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Confrontation at the End of the Line

Mick Travis: [to Denson, having a cold shower] My time's up, you bastard!

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Teeth as a personal good luck charm

Mick Travis: [to Denson, about his necklace] They're my teeth; they're my good luck charm.

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A Poignant Reflection on Love and Mortality

Mick Travis: [looking at a model in a magazine] There's only one thing you can do with a girl like this. Walk naked into the sea together as the sun sets. Make love once... Then die.

The Creative Nature of War

Mick Travis: War is the last possible creative act.

The Nature of War and Revolution

Mick Travis: There's no such thing as a wrong war. Violence and revolution are the only pure acts.

Impending Doom and Destruction of Humanity

Mick Travis: The whole world will end very soon - black, brittle bodies peeling into ash...

Request for consideration in shared space

Mick Travis: [to Stephans] Excuse me, you mind not picking your shag-spots in here?

A Warning Against Current Actions

Mick Travis: [after lights-out, whispering] Stephans. Whatever you're doing now... don't.

A Cheerful Acknowledgment from Mick Travis

Mick Travis: [clapping slowly, facetiously] Jolly, jolly good, Stephans.

A Question of Living and Experience

Mick Travis: [telling Knightly of his summer activities; Chuckles; Chuckles; School bell rings] I...met this fantastic bird in the East End, went round all the pubs. You ever been to those pubs? You should see those old loves dancing...showing their knickers. Take em off near the end. She had a weird religion - only kiss on Thursdays. Took me home to meet her mum and dad. Well, that finished it. Practically married us off, they did, over the Sunday joint. When do we live? That's what I want to know.