Jackass: The Movie (2002) - Quotes

Ryan Dunn: [[w:Miller Brewing Company#Miller High Life|Miller High Life] Ryan Dunn: I could sure go for a ]...

Ryan Dunn: Knoxville knocked my nuts in half!

Ryan Dunn: [''Referring to proceed with a boxing match with [[w:Naoko Kumagai|Naoko Kumagai; [w:Kickboxing|Japanese kickboxer] ], a female I'm about to get the shit kicked out of me by a girl.

Bam Margera: [''After getting a surprise haircut''] Eh! What the fuck!

Bam Margera: [''About the upset customer in the store''; [w:QTips|QTips] He was so bummed! He went there to buy ] and he just got bummed because there was a fight going on!

Bam Margera: [''Referring to father Phil's obesity''] Look at Phil's tummy.

Bam Margera: [''[[w:Tony Hawk|Tony Hawk; [w:testicles|the testicles] This is Sweaty Fat Fucks. ] and Mat Hoffman hit Bam in

Bam Margera: [''From extended footage, on phone''; ''To cameraman''] How much does Rake hate mustard? This is Rake's mom and she says I wouldn't be able to have children in my future.

Bam Margera: [''After waking Phil up with fire works''] Hey Phil, you know you have to get up at 5 in the morning tonight.

Bam Margera: Whose dick do I gotta suck to get some explosions around here?

Johnny Knoxville: [[w:Eric Koston|Eric Koston; [w:Clyde Singleton|Clyde Singleton] I'm here with ] and ] and today I'm gonna 50-50 this rail and... or try to.

Johnny Knoxville: I have bad news written all over me.

Johnny Knoxville: This is the Muscle Simulator.

Johnny Knoxville: [''To "Jewelery Burglary" skit bystander''] I was barely halfway through the ceiling and you were already out the door!

Johnny Knoxville: That was my flesh!

Johnny Knoxville: [''To Steve-O''; ''Later, in disbelief after Steve O exits the septic river''] Go grab the dead kitty! You're not going to save the kitty?

Johnny Knoxville: I fell and busted my ass, that's what's fuckin wrong!

Johnny Knoxville: You little bastard!

Johnny Knoxville: There's no such thing as failure, Steve-O!... One thing I know, is good tightrope walking!

Johnny Knoxville: [''Referring to firework going off''] That almost hit Loomis in the face!

Johnny Knoxville: [''After returning the smashed up car''] But I returned it with a full tank of gas.

Johnny Knoxville: Do you have a pocket ass?

Johnny Knoxville: [''Giving off camera direction to Jason "Wee-Man" Acuna''] Kick yourself in the head, wee man.

Johnny Knoxville: [''Laughing at Dave England who has soiled himself''] Oh shit, I'm taking a cab back to the hotel!

Johnny Knoxville: I think I'm a little concussed.

Johnny Knoxville: [''After being beat up by [[w:Butterbean|Butterbean] Is Butterbean OK?

Johnny Knoxville: Did you see the way I stopped the beanbag with my stomach? That's instinct. You can't teach that.

Johnny Knoxville: Hello, I'm Johnny Knoxville, and we're about to test my rocket skates.

Johnny Knoxville: [''Opening line''] Hi, I’m Johnny Knoxville, and welcome to Jackass!

Johnny Knoxville: [''Opening narration''] WARNING: The stunts in this movie were performed by professionals, so for your safety and the protection of those around you, do not attempt any of the stunts you're about to see.