Lethal Weapon poster

Lethal Weapon Quotes

"If these two can learn to stand each other... the bad guys don't stand a chance."

R 1987 · 1h 50m
73
Audience
73
Audience
31 quotes
Aging and Frustration in Law Enforcement
Roger Murtaugh I'm too old for this shit.
[''repeated line in all four movies'']
A Dire Situation Requires Immediate Action
Martin Riggs You know they're gonna kill her, don't you?
Roger Murtaugh Yeah.
Martin Riggs So, if you want her back, you're gonna have to take her away from them.
Roger Murtaugh I know.
Martin Riggs You do this my way. You shoot, you shoot to kill, get as many of them as you can. All you gotta do is just not miss.
Roger Murtaugh I won't miss.
Martin Riggs We're gonna get bloody on this one, Rog.
Roger Murtaugh Are you really crazy... or are you as good as you say you are?
Martin Riggs You're gonna have to trust me.
A Debt of Honor in War
Martin Riggs What did he mean back there when he said you owed him?
Roger Murtaugh We served together in 65. la Drang Valley. Saved my life. Took a bayonet in the lungs.
Martin Riggs That was nice of him.
Acknowledging Genuine Madness in Others
Roger Murtaugh You're not trying to draw a psycho pension! You really are crazy!
[''just after Murtaugh prevents Riggs from shooting himself'']
Embracing Simplicity in Complexity
Martin Riggs I don't make things difficult. That's the way they get, all by themselves.
Expertise in Inflicting Pain Acknowledged
Mr. Joshua Endo here has forgotten more about dispensing pain than you and I will ever know.
Testing the Audi's Performance
Mr. Joshua Mind if I test-drive your Audi?
[''stealing a man's car'']
A Hopeful Gesture Amidst Danger
Martin Riggs Maybe we'll stay alive long enough for me to buy you a present.
A Christmas Turkey Invitation
Roger Murtaugh Hey, Riggs!
Martin Riggs Yo.
Roger Murtaugh After all we've been through, if you think I'm gonna eat the world's lousiest Christmas turkey by myself, you're crazy.
Martin Riggs Well, I have news for you, Rog.
Roger Murtaugh What?
Martin Riggs I'm not crazy.
Roger Murtaugh I know.
Martin Riggs Well, good. Let's eat.
Confrontation and Conflict in Lethal Weapon
General Peter McAllister Kill the son of a bitch!
Martin Riggs Who's fucking next?! McAllister! Who's next?!
Identifying the Suspect in a Crime
Martin Riggs The guy who shot me! The same Albino jackrabbit son of a bitch who did Hunsacker!
Roger Murtaugh You sure?
Martin Riggs Yeah, I'm sure man. I never forget an asshole.
Acknowledgment of Sacrifice and Friendship
Roger Murtaugh Listen, sorry about all that shit I was in your face about earlier... you saved my life. Thank you.
Martin Riggs Oh, I bet that hurt to say.
Roger Murtaugh You'll never know.
[''chuckles'']
Unwanted Distractions on My Property
Roger Murtaugh Get that shit off my lawn!
[''when Joshua is panting on the lawn after the title-fight'']
A Dark Humor Exchange Between Partners
Roger Murtaugh Have you ever met anybody you didn't kill?
Martin Riggs: Well, I haven't killed you yet.
Roger Murtaugh Well don't do me no favors!
Frustration During the Holiday Season
Mr. Joshua Goddamn Christmas!
[Responding to Scrooge on "A Christmas Carol" on TV]
Final Confrontation with General McAlister
Roger Murtaugh General McAlister, time for you to die.
Casual Conversation Among Characters
Martin Riggs Hey, you know what?
Confrontation Over Shipment Details
Mr. Joshua Hit him again.
[''Endo does'']
Mr. Joshua Hit him again.
[''Endo hits him again for longer'']
Mr. Joshua Come on! Tell me about the shipment!
Martin Riggs I swear I'm gonna fucking kill the both of you!
[''yells and spouts gibberish, then spits at Endo, lunges at Joshua'']
Mr. Joshua Yeah, yeah, very funny. Now what about the shipment?
Considering a career change in firefighting
Martin Riggs Maybe there's an opening in the L.A. Fire Department?
Experience and Age in Driving Skills
Roger Murtaugh I was driving before you were an itch in your daddy's pants!
A Humorous Take on Urgency
Martin Riggs What did one shepherd say to the other shepherd? Let's get the flock out of here.
[after rescuing Murtaugh and Rianne]
Challenging for the Title
Martin Riggs How about it, Jack? Would you like a shot at the title?
Mr. Joshua Don't mind if I do.
Martin Riggs I want your title.
[''real tough'']
Mr. Joshua Okay.
[''smirks'']
Confrontation Over Shipment in Lethal Weapon
Culprit The shipment, Mr. Murtaugh.
[''punches Murtaugh in the mouth'']
Roger Murtaugh Go spit!
Facing Imminent Danger and Realism
Roger Murtaugh No way you live. No way.
[''aiming his gun at McAlister's oncoming car'']
Observation on Wealth and Lifestyle Choices
Martin Riggs Saw this on Lifestyles of the Rich and Shameless.
[Riggs and Murtaugh go to a bust at a "rich house"]
Assertion of Authority and Identity
Martin Riggs Now that's a real badge, I'm a real cop, and this is a real fucking gun!
Reflection on Loss and Future Reunion
Martin Riggs I miss you... Victoria Lynn. Hey, that's silly, isn't it? I'll see you later. I'll see you much later.
[holding his wife's wedding photograph, sniffling, after deciding not to kill himself; cries; sobs, then sighs and sniffles; 6 seconds later; throws wedding photograph on the floor]
Confrontation Over Life and Death Choices
Roger Murtaugh GET IN HERE!!
[Riggs enters, Murtaugh throws the door shut, but the door swings the other way]
Roger Murtaugh Okay, clown, no bullshit! You wanna kill yourself?
Martin Riggs Oh, for Christ-...
Roger Murtaugh SHUT UP! Yes or no - you wanna die?!
Martin Riggs Oh, I got the job done! What the hell--
Roger Murtaugh JUST ANSWER THE QUESTION!
Martin Riggs Well, what do you wanna hear, man?! Do you wanna hear that sometimes I think about eatin a bullet?! HUH!? Well, I do! I even got a special bullet for the occasion with a hollow point, look! Make sure it blows the back of my goddamned head out and do the job right! Every single day I wake up and I think of a reason not to do it! Every single day! You know why I don't do it?! This is gonna make you laugh! You know why I don't do it?! The job! Doin the job! Now that's the reason!
Driving in a Dangerous City
Martin Riggs You want me to drive?
Roger Murtaugh No, you're supposed to be suicidal, remember? I'LL drive.
Martin Riggs Anybody who drives around in this town IS suicidal.
Aging and Its Challenges
Roger Murtaugh I'm too old for this...
[''last lines'']
Unwanted Partnership Amidst Personal Struggles
Martin Riggs Hey, look friend, let's just cut the shit. Now we both know why I was transferred. Everybody thinks I'm suicidal, in which case, I'm fucked and nobody wants to work with me; or they think I'm faking to draw a psycho pension, in which case, I'm fucked and nobody wants to work with me. Basically, I'm fucked.
Roger Murtaugh Guess what?
Martin Riggs What?
Roger Murtaugh I don't want to work with you!
Martin Riggs Hey, don't.
Roger Murtaugh Ain't got no choice! Looks like we both been fucked!
Martin Riggs Terrific.
Roger Murtaugh God hates me. That's what it is.
Martin Riggs Hate Him back; it works for me.