Little Miss Sunshine (2006) - Quotes

Officer's Warning Against Future Pageants

Officer Martinez: Okay, you're out. On the condition that you never enter your daughter in a beauty pageant in the state of California, ever again... ever.

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Audience Member Expresses Enthusiasm at Event

Audience member: [once Olive is done dancing] YEAH! ALRIGHT!

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Embracing Individuality in Little Miss Sunshine

Sheryl: We have to let Olive be Olive.

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The Decision to Return

Frank: Do you want to go back?

Dwayne: [long pause] Not really. Yeah, we should go back.

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A Father's Pride in His Daughter's Performance

Pageant Official Jenkins: [outraged at Olive's talent act] What is your daughter doing?

Richard: She's kickin ass, that's what she's doing.

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Unexpected Dedication at a Pageant

Olive: I'd like to dedicate this to my grandpa, who showed me these moves.

Pageant MC: Aww, that is so sweet.

Pageant MC: Is he here? Where's your grandpa right now?

Olive: In the trunk of our car.

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Finding the Dressing Rooms at the Pageant

Dwayne: Hey, where are the dressing rooms?

Contestant: Are you even allowed back here?

Dwayne: Just tell me where the dressing rooms are!

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Backstage Authorization Inquiry

Pageant Assistant Pam: [Dwayne walks swiftly by] Are you authorized to be backstage?

Dwayne: [emotionless, without stopping] No.

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Embracing Suffering as a Path to Growth

Dwayne: I wish I could just sleep until I was eighteen and skip all of this, high school, everything.

Frank: [[Marcel Proust] Do you know who ] is?

Dwayne: He's the guy you teach.

Frank: [[William Shakespeare|Shakespeare] Yeah. French writer. Total loser. Never had a real job. Unrequited love affairs. Gay. Spent 20 years writing a book almost no one reads. But he's also probably the greatest writer since ]. Anyway, he, uh, he gets down to the end of his life, and he looks back and decides that all those years he suffered, those were the best years of his life, cause they made him who he was. All those years he was happy? You know, total waste. Didn't learn a thing. So, if you sleep until you're 18-- ah, think of the suffering you're gonna miss. I mean high school? High school-- those are your prime suffering years. You don't get better suffering than that.

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Ice Cream Preferences Discussed Among Contestants

Olive: Do you eat ice cream?

Miss California: Yes. My favorite is Cherry Chocolate Garcia, except technically I think it's a frozen yogurt.

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A Playful Test of Perception and Vision

Olive: [going over eye test pamphlets] Mom, Dwayne's got 20/20 vision!

Sheryl: I bet he does.

Olive: Now, let's see if you're colorblind.

Olive: What's the letter in the circle?

Olive: The letter in the circle?

Frank: Can you see a letter, Dwayne?

Olive: It's an "A". See? Right there?

Frank: It's bright green.

Frank: Dwayne, I think you might be colorblind.

Frank: You can't fly jets if you're colorblind.

Dwayne: [yelling; he collapses, screaming and sobbing, after breaking his nine-month vow of silence] FUCK!!!!!! FUCK!!!!!

Sheryl: What happened?

Frank: He's colorblind. He can't fly.

Sheryl: [waits several moments, then approaches Dwayne] Oh, Jesus. Oh, no. Dwayne? Dwayne, honey, I'm sorry. Dwayne, come on. We have to go.

Dwayne: I'm not going.

Sheryl: Dwayne.

Dwayne: I said I'm not, okay? I don't care, I'm not getting on that bus again.

Sheryl: Dwayne, for better or worse, we're your family.

Dwayne: [stands up; points to Sheryl, Richard, and Frank as he shouts] No, you're not my family, okay? I don't want to be your family! I hate you fucking people! I hate you! Divorce, bankrupt, suicide?! You're fucking losers! You are losers!

Sheryl: [whispers] Dwayne.

Dwayne: [begins to cry again] No, please just leave me here, Mom. Okay? Please, please. Please just leave me here.

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Concerns About Grandpa's Condition

Olive: Mom? Dad?

Richard: [half asleep] What is it, hon?

Olive: Grandpa won't wake up.

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Overcoming Feelings of Inadequacy

Olive: Grandpa?

Edwin: Yeah?

Olive: [tearfully] I don't wanna be a loser.

Edwin: You're not a loser. Where'd you get the idea you're a loser?

Olive: [breaking down] Because... Daddy hates losers.

Grandpa: Whoa whoa whoa, back up a minute. D'you know what a loser is? A real loser is someone who's so afraid of not winning, they don't even try. Now you're trying, right?

Olive: [tearfully] Yeah?

Edwin: Well then you're not a loser! We're gonna have fun tomorrow, right?

Olive: [more cheerfully; takes her glasses off; wipes her eyes] Yeah.

Edwin: We can tell em all to go to hell.

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A Grandfather's Love and Affirmation of Beauty

Olive: Grandpa, am I pretty?

Edwin: Olive, you are the most beautiful girl in the whole world.

Olive: You're just saying that.

Edwin: No! I'm madly in love with you and it's not because of your brains or your personality. It's because you're beautiful, inside and out.

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A Conversation on Awareness and Clarity

Sheryl: What happened?

Richard: I'll tell you when I regain consciousness.

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Sarcasm and Perceptions of Sympathy

Richard: I feel sorry for you.

Frank: [sarcastically] You do?

Richard: Sarcasm is the refuge of losers.

Frank: [sarcastically] It is? Really?

Richard: Sarcasm is losers trying to bring winners down to their level and that's step four in the program.

Frank: [sarcastically] Thank you for opening my eyes to what a loser I am! How much do I owe you for those pearls of wisdom?

Richard: Oh, that one's on the house!

Sheryl: Guys, stop it, stop it!

Frank: He started it!

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Commitment to Team Loyalty

Frank: [saluting Dwayne] No one gets left behind! No one gets left behind! Outstanding soldier! Outstanding!

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Language and Fashion in Little Miss Sunshine

Frank: Actually, Olive, "a la mode" in French translates as "in the fashion". A la mode. "Mode" is derived from latin "modus" do or proper...

Richard: Frank, shut up.

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Exhaustion and Family Dynamics in Conversation

Edwin: Jesus, I'm tired. I'm so fucking tired. Do you know how tired I am? If some girl came up to me, begged me to fuck her, I couldn't do it. That's how tired I am.

Richard: Dad? Uh, watch the language, huh?

Edwin: [Olive is still listening to music while Richard and Sheryl look at her] She's listening to music. Olive, I'll give you a million dollars if you turn around. See?

Richard: All right. But the rest of us.

Edwin: [turns to Dwayne] Oh, the rest of you. Can I give you some advice?

Edwin: Well, I'm going to give it to you anyway. I don't want you making the same mistakes I made when I was young.

Richard: Can't wait to hear this.

Edwin: Dwayne, that's your name, right? Dwayne? This is the voice of experience talking. Are you listening? Fuck a lot of women, Dwayne.

Richard: Hey. Dad!

Edwin: Not just one woman. A lot of women.

Richard: That's enough, all right?

Edwin: Are you getting any?

Richard: Dad!

Edwin: You can tell me, Dwayne. Are you getting any?

Richard: Come on, please.

Grandpa: No? Jesus. You're what, 15? My God, man!

Richard: Dad!

Edwin: You should be getting that young stuff.

Richard: Dad. Dad! Hey!

Edwin: That young stuff is the best in the world. That young stuff is the best stuff in the whole world!

Richard: Hey, Dad, that's enough! Stop it!

Edwin: [turns to Dwayne] Will you kindly not interrupt me, Richard?! See, right now you're jailbait. They're jailbait. It's perfect. I mean, you hit 18, man, you're talking about three to five.

Richard: Hey, I will pull this truck over right now!

Edwin: So pull the truck over! You're not going to shut me up! Fuck you, I can say what I want! I still got Nazi bullets in my ass!

Richard: Ah, the Nazi bullets!

Edwin: You're as bad as those fuckers at Sunset Manor.

Frank: What happened at Sunset Manor?

Sheryl: Frank, don't encourage him.

Edwin: What happened? I'll tell you what happened. I paid my money. They took my money. I should be able to do what the fuck I want!

Sheryl: [to Frank] He started snorting heroin.

Frank: [to Edwin] You started snorting heroin?

Edwin: [in response to Frank] I'm old!

Frank: Well, that stuff will kill you.

Edwin: [to Dwayne] What am I, an idiot? And don't you start taking that shit. When you're young, you're crazy to do that stuff.

Frank: [to Edwin] Well, what about you?

Edwin: What about me? I'm old! When you're old, you're crazy not to do it.

Sheryl: We've tried, believe me. The intervention was a fiasco. He's worse than a two-year-old.

Richard: Can we please talk about something else?

Frank: I take it you didn't like it at Sunset Manor?

Sheryl: Frank.

Edwin: Are you kidding me? It was a fucking paradise. They got a pool, they got golf. Now I'm stuck with Mr. Happy here, sleeping on a fucking sofa. Look, I know you're a homo and all, but maybe you can appreciate this. You go to one of those places, there's four women for every guy. Can you imagine what that's like?

Frank: You must have been very busy.

Edwin: Whoa. I had second degree burns on my Johnson, I kid you not.

Frank: Really?

Edwin: Forget about it.

Olive: [takes off her headphones] What are you talking about?

Edwin: Politics.

Olive: [Puts her headphones back on] Oh.

Edwin: [to Dwayne] Fuck a lotta women, kid. I've got no reason to lie to you. Not just one woman. A lotta women.

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Acknowledging Support and Gratitude Among Friends

Frank: Not on your watch. I wouldn't do that to you.

Frank: Thank you, Dwayne. Coming from you, that means a lot. Goodnight.

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Grandfather's Contribution to the Competition

Edwin: I'm not driving.

Sheryl: Well, Grandpa doesn't have to come.

Edwin: What? I coached her. I gave her the moves.

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Reluctance in the Face of Group Activity

Frank: [reading Dwayne's writing] Ok, but I'm not going to have any fun." Yeah, well, we're all with you on that one, Dwayne.

Controversy Surrounds Beauty Pageant Winner's Forfeiture

Cindy: [Sheryl's sister on answering machine] The girl who won had to forfeit her crown. I don't know why, something about diet pills. But anyway, now she has a place in the state contest.

The Importance of Determination Over Luck

Olive: I practice everyday.

Frank: Well, then, good luck.

Richard: It's not about luck, Frank. Luck is the name losers give to their own failings. It's about wanting to win.

Questioning Tolerance in Frustrating Situations

Frank: [about Richard's obsessiveness with winning] Is he always like this?

Frank: How can you stand it?

Confronting Difficult Conversations in Family Dynamics

Olive: Why did you want to kill yourself?

Richard: No, don't answer the question, Frank.

Sheryl: Richard...

Richard: Don't answer it. He's not going to answer the question.

Frank: I wanted to kill myself because I was very unhappy..

Richard: He's sick! He is a sick man! He's sick in his head!

Sheryl: Richard!

Richard: I'm sorry, I don't think it's an appropriate conversation for a seven year-old.

Sheryl: Well, she's going to find out anyway.

Richard: Okay.

Sheryl: Go on, Frank.

Olive: Why were you unhappy?

Frank: There were a lot of reasons, mainly though I fell in love with someone who didn't love me back.

Olive: Who?

Frank: One of my grad students. I was very much in love with him.

Olive: Him? It was a boy? You fell in love with a boy?

Frank: Yes, I did. Very much so.

Olive: That's silly.

Frank: Yes, you're right. It was very, very silly.

Edwin: [under his breath] There's another word for it.

Richard: Dad.

Olive: So that's when you tried to kill yourself.

Frank: Well, no, the boy that I was in love with fell in love with another man. Larry Sugarman.

Sheryl: Who's Larry Sugarman?

Frank: Larry Sugarman is perhaps the second most highly regarded Proust scholar in the U.S.

Richard: Who's number one?

Frank: That would be me, Rich.

Olive: So that's when...

Frank: No, uh, what happened was I was a bit upset, so I said some things that I shouldn't have said and did some things that I shouldn't have done, and subsequently I was fired from my job and forced to move out of my apartment and into a motel.

Olive: And that's when you..

Frank: Well, no. Actually, all of that was...okay, what happened was, two days ago the MacArthur Foundation, in its infinite wisdom, awarded a genius grant to Larry Sugarman. And that's when I...

Edwin: Decided to check out early.

Frank: Yes. Yes. And I failed at that as well.

Dinner Discontent and Family Tensions

Edwin: What's that? Chicken? Every night it's the fucking chicken! Holy God Almighty! Is it possible, just once, we could get something to eat for dinner around here that's not the goddamned fucking chicken?

Richard: Whenever you are ready to cook your own food, you're more than welcome to it.

Edwin: Well, at Sunset Manor, ya know...

Richard: If you liked Sunset Manor so much, you shouldn't have gotten yourself kicked out of there, right?