12 quotes
Crew Roll Call in Muppet Adventure
Mr. Arrow
Roll call! Long John Silver?
[reads from list]
Long John Silver
Aye aye, sir!
Mr. Arrow
Short Stack Stevens?
Short Stack Stevens
Aye!
Mr. Arrow
One-Eyed Jack?
One-Eyed Jack
Aye.
Mr. Arrow
Black Eye Pete?
Black Eye Pete
Yeah.
Mr. Arrow
Walleyed Pike?
Walleyed Pike
Aye.
Mr. Arrow
Polly Lobster?
Polly Lobster
(Squawks and whistles)
Mr. Arrow
Mad Monty?
Mad Monty
Aye.
Mr. Arrow
Sweetums?
Sweetums
AYE.
[from behind them]
Mr. Arrow
...Old Tom?
Old Tom
Aye aye.
Mr. Arrow
Real Old Tom?
Real Old Tom
Aye!
Mr. Arrow
Dead Tom?
Dead Tom
Aye aye!!
Gonzo
Cool.
Mr. Arrow
Clueless Morgan?
Clueless Morgan
Huh?
Mr. Arrow
Headless Bill? Headless Bill? Big-Fat-Ugly-Bug-Face-Baby-Eating O'Brien?
[no response; leans to the side and sees a headless puppet saluting in acknowledgment]
O'Brien
Aye.
[in her deep voice]
Mr. Arrow
Angel Marie?
[stands in aghast momentarily before reading off the final name]
Angel Marie
Aye, aye.
[in his deep voice]
Captain Smollett
Hmm...hmm...Gentlemen, may I see you in my cabin? Immediately?
Captain Smollett
Who hired this crew?! This is without a doubt, the seediest bunch of cutthroats, villains, and scoundrels I have ever seen! So, who hired em?! Your finger hired the crew?
[Later, in his cabin; whimpers with a pant. Jim, Rizzo, Gonzo, the rest of The Muppets, and officers point at Trelawney, who in turn points at his finger]
Captain Smollett
A cook, and a guy who lives in a bear's finger?
[stunned]
Captain Smollett
I'm starting to worry about this voyage.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Billy Bones and the Black Spot
Billy Bones
THE BLACK SPOT!!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Stranding Pirates: The Plan Unfolds
Captain Smollett
Here's the plan. Once the pirates are ashore, we take the Hispaniola back to Bristol, and leave them stranded on Treasure Island.
Doctor
Excellent plan.
Rizzo
Except for one thing: the pirates have Jim!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Pigs, Storms, and a Crow's Nest Dilemma
Rizzo
Terrific. Captured by crazed wild pigs and sacrificed hideously before a pagan altar.
Gonzo
Are we lucky or what?
Trelawney
Probably not lucky. I'm starting to worry about those storm clouds!
Benjamina Gunn
Next time, Kermie and I are going to find that below deck instead of that drenching Crow's Nest. Hey! Let go you no good big beluga!
[Rizzo whimpers before screaming and grabbing Miss Piggy's hand heading to the Crow's Nest]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Cautionary Advice from Billy Bones
Billy Bones
(last words) Aye! But also... beware of running with scissors or any other pointy objects, it's all good fun until somebody loses an EYYYYYEEE!!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
The Black Spot: A Pirate's Death Sentence
Billy Bones
The Black Spot's a pirate's death sentence! They'll be coming to kill me... TONIGHT!!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Family Confronts Long John Silver
Long John Silver
Excuse me?
Benjammina Gunn
Going somewhere, John-John?
[also appears]
Long John Silver
Well, Master Hawkins, it seems your little family has come together against me.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Desperation for Rum Amidst Chaos
Billy Bones
Enough with this singing! Rum! I need rum, lads! I've got a horrors! Give me rum! Rum til I float!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Unresolved Feelings and Regrets at Sea
Benjamina Gunn
Of all the backwater, no-class piles of sand in the ocean, you had to wash up on mine!
Captain Smollett
Benjamina, I just want you to know that I'm sorry.
Benjamina Gunn
Sorry? No, no; "Sorry" doesn't cut it. You left me standing at the altar!
Captain Smollett
I was on a ship headed for Zanzibar. I got cold feet.
Benjamina Gunn
You're a frog. You're supposed to have cold feet! My mother came all the way from France. I was wearing her white lace dress. The cake was filled with lemon custard!
Captain Smollett
Benjamina, fate has brought us together again. Well, actually, buried treasure and pirates brought us together--
Benjamina Gunn
Don't you start with me about pirates! After you jilted me, I took up with this Bernie Flint. The man was totally co-dependent.
Captain Smollett
You and Captain Flint?
Benjamina Gunn
Well, he was a pirate, I was a lady, you know the story. Smollett? He marooned me! Me! Oh, what have I done?!
[sobs]
Captain Smollett
Oh, this it all my fault! What have I done to you?
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Billy Bones Reflects on Flint's Treasure Journey
Billy Bones
I was Flint's first mate that voyage...three days east of Tortola in the Caribie, Flint knew an island. That's where we buried the treasure. Gold and blood; they were Flint's trademarks. He'd leave both behind him, that day.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
The Mysterious Tale of Flint's Treasure Map
Billy Bones
Oh, aye. Fifteen men went ashore that day...and only Flint, his own self, returned. Oh, aye, and then old Flinty...up and died afore they could get back to that cursed island, and dig up the treasure. No one knows to this day who has old Flint's map. Now, isn't that a story worth the hearing?
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Confrontation Between Jim and Silver
Jim Hawkins
Silver!
Long John Silver
I suppose you'll be blowing the whistle on me now, won't you, Jim?
Jim Hawkins
I suppose I will. You have to return to Bristol to stand trial.
[raising his whistle]
Long John Silver
Oh, I'm sorry, Jim. I got a terrible fear of hanging. We're shipmates, aren't we, Jim? Gentlemen of fortune, together. Give us one more chance? Oh, hell, Jim. I could never harm you. You're honest and brave and true. You didn't learn that from me.
[aims his pistol at him; Jim does not drop his whistle. After a long pause, he lowers his pistol; changing his heart]
Jim Hawkins
I learned it from my friends, Mr. Silver. Now take your oars and row away. I never want to see you again, ever.
Long John Silver
Oh, Jim? Tis a shame, really. We'd have made a great team, Jim.
[begins to row away, but stops; throws Jim back his compass and rows off]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.