30 quotes
Twain's Unusual Pursuit in France
Milo Perrier
Mr. Twain would come to France every season…to hunt poodles.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Uncertainty in the Face of Mystery
Sam Diamond
That can only mean one thing—and I don't know what it is!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Questioning the Moose on the Wall
Sam Diamond
Why don't you ask the moose on the wall? He's been watching us since we came in.
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Confusion Over Pet Food Choices
Inspector Sidney Wang
You feed cat…dog food?
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Inspector Wang's Frustration with Unfinished Stories
Inspector Sidney Wang
Treacherous road like fresh mushroom...must always— Idiot! Not finish mushroom story! You Idiot!
[Willie drives the car away.]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Diagnosis of Death by Inspector Wang
Inspector Sidney Wang
No pulse. No heartbeat. If condition does not change, this man is dead.
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Unpleasant Task of a Dead Butler
Milo Perrier
You don't have to say "dead butler." It's bad enough I have to put my hand in his pocket.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Misunderstood Love and Its Consequences
Inspector Sidney Wang
He loved me very much, but he was not very observant. One day when I was nineteen, he called me to his study, realized for the first time that I was Oriental, and kicked me out of house!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Unexpected Sounds from Unlikely Places
Inspector Sidney Wang
Voice come from cow on wall!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Hunger and Communication in Murder by Death
Milo Perrier
You should not speak with an accent when you know I'm so hungry.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Reviving the Butler Did It Theory
Inspector Sidney Wang
Went back to theory seldom used today: "Butler Did It.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Simple Answers, Complex Questions
Inspector Sidney Wang
Answer simple, but question, very hard.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Adoption for Practical Reasons
Inspector Sidney Wang
Son will get bags. That is why I adopted him.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A humorous take on danger and sleep
Inspector Sidney Wang
Someone just put deadly snake in room. Wake me when it come near bed.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Admiration from a Small Detective
Inspector Sidney Wang
Miss Marbles, I have admired you since I was tiny little detective.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Critique of Gender Perception
Milo Perrier
As a man you are barely passable, but as a woman you are a dog.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Identity and Nationality in Humor
Milo Perrier
I am not a Frenchie, I'm a Belgie!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
High Stakes in a Deadly Game
Milo Perrier
One of us will be one million dollars richer, and one of us will be going to the gas chamber to be hung.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Observation of Height Perception
Milo Perrier
You look taller to me. Why is that?
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Absurdity of Futile Arguments
Inspector Sidney Wang
Man who argue with cow on wall like train with no wheels, very soon get nowhere.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Empty Rooms and Their Silent Inhabitants
Inspector Sidney Wang
Room filled with empty people.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Impatience for Dinner and a Corpse
Milo Perrier
Monsieur Twain, we have been here nearly four hours and there has not been a hint of a hot dinner or a cold corpse. I must therefore bid you adieu.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Irritating Questions and Their Impact
Inspector Sidney Wang
Questions like athlete's foot…after a while, very irritating.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Taking Turns in Investigation
Sam Diamond
All right, we'll take turns. You look over the first dead, naked body that we find and I'll look over the second.
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Criminal History of a Suspected Smuggler
Tess Skeffington
There's nothing on him until 46, when he was picked up in El Paso, Texas for trying to smuggle a truckload of rich, white Americans across the border into Mexico to pick melons. He was sent to the Dallas state hospital for mental observation.
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Unwelcome Guests Despite Great Efforts
Inspector Sidney Wang
Someone gone to great trouble to make welcome guests, not so welcome.
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A Distinction in Family-Related Crimes
Milo Perrier
Forgive me, but I was talking about patricide, not uncle-cide.
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Concern for Sam's Well-Being
Tess Skeffington
Please, excuse Sam. He was shot in the head last week. He shouldn't even be out of the hospital.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Observations on Physicality and Relationships
Inspector Sidney Wang
Big house like man married to fat woman…hard to get around.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Unnecessary Conversation During Honeymoon
Inspector Sidney Wang
Conversation like television set on honeymoon…not necessary.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.