National Security (2003) - Quotes

Taglines: This January, a buddy comedy without the buddies.

Hank: Do you know how to hot wire a car?

Earl: what, you think because i'm black I can hot wire a car

Hank: Well can you?

Earl: Yeah! but not because I'm Black

Earl Montgomery: [''After narrowly being stung by a bee''] Is it gone? Everything's okay?

Denise: [''Upon discovering he let Hank go to prison for a bogus race crime''; ''Punches him in the mouth''] Not from you!

Earl Montgomery: [''Reeling from being smacked in the jaw''] Did she have to hit me that hard?

Nash: I thought I shot you. You must be one tough monkey.

Earl: [''Laughs''] You and the monkey jokes, huh? Didn't your momma teach you any manners while you were humpin her?

Hank: [''Flashing police badge''] Get out of the damn car!

Woman motorist: [''Slapping Hank''] Didn't your mama teach you any manners? The least you could do is ask me nice!

Hank: [''Annoyed at Earl''] You got something in your teeth.

Earl: [''Opens mouth''; ''Hank punches Earl in the mouth''] Where, here or here?

Earl: This isn't the first time I was arrested for DWB.

Detective Frank McDuff: DWB?

Earl: [[w:racial profiling|Driving While Black] ].

Hank: This is a beer keg. It doesn't make any sense.

Earl: It makes sense when you put together the pieces.

Hank: What pieces?

Earl: It's obvious. The CIA, they're smuggling alcohol into the inner city in an effort to further subjugate the black man.

Hank: Do you actually believe the crap that comes out of your mouth?

Earl: I'm not really sure until I'm finished talkin'.

Hank: Need some help?

Earl: Are you asking me if I need some help or am I stealing this car?

Hank: Are you stealing this car?

Earl: Does it look like I'm stealing this damn car?

Hank: A little bit.

Earl: Why, cause I'm black? If you saw a white guy doing this you'd give him a reward.

Hank: Let me see your license.

Earl: I ain't showin you a damn thing! This is my car and I didn't do anything wrong. You owe me an apology.

Hank: You're in dangerous grounds here, bub, I'd be careful what comes out of your mouth next!

Earl: Oh, you want to hear what comes out of my mouth next? You're... a... fucking... pig!

Earl: [''Upon seeing Washington shows up with a hit squad''; ''On seeing his being held at gunpoint''] He Must've Grown Up In A White Neighbourhood Oh, thank you Jesus!

Earl: [''After firing off two shots an a senior woman's vehicle, making it skid to a halt''; ''The vehicle instantly explodes''] Ma'am, you may now, reprocure, your vehicle.

Earl: Your partner got killed. You lost your job. You went to jail. Your girlfriend walked. You got a job as a security guard at a hundred and eighty-two dollars a week. You know what you are, Hank? You're a black man.

Earl: [''Recurring line''] What the problem is?

Hank Rafferty: [''A tall woman is holding Earl up with one hand''; ''Woman looks at him quizzically''] Okay, put him down. In a minute or, two. Don't hurry.

Hank Rafferty: I know baby. But I promise you. My life is already pretty much figured out.

Hank Rafferty: I had a partner! I would have taken a bullet for him! You I'm having a hard time not shooting!