Misunderstandings About Appearance and Identity
Ramona:
I don't care about your weight or your false teeth.
Earl Keese:
I haven't got false teeth!
Ramona:
I'm sorry, I guess they just look false.
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Misunderstanding Leads to Accusations Between Characters
Ramona:
He tried to pork me.
Earl Keese:
Pork you? What?
Ramona:
You know you did.
Earl Keese:
I swear, I never touched her.
Ramona:
Well, I wasn't born with your hand in my bush.
Earl Keese:
Enid... help me.
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A Dispute Over Culinary Jealousy
Vic:
In light of Earl's feelings, I think it would be best if we left.
Enid Keese:
Oh, no, no. Sit down, sit down. Let's finish this magnificent meat. Don't worry about Earl. He'll get over his feelings.
Vic:
He spurned my sauce!
Enid Keese:
No, he loves your sauce. He's just jealous, he can't cook.
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Discussion of Baby's Behavior and Care
Vic:
Old Earl here was worried about Baby.
Enid Keese:
Oh, he's no trouble at all. He's a perfect gentleman. You can leave him with me anytime you want.
Vic:
Don't worry, I will.
Enid Keese: [to Earl]
They spoil him awfully.
Vic:
Well, I want him to have every advantage I was denied as a young dog.
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Fantasies and Reality in Everyday Life
Ramona:
Now, I'm just going to go under the covers and take a little inventory.
Earl Keese:
You're really wonderful!
Ramona:
That's what I've been trying to tell you. Is it so hard having your fantasies come to life?
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Confrontation Over Boundaries in the Home
Vic:
We're waiting, or do I have to pound it out of you?
Earl Keese:
Don't ever speak to me like that in my own house!
Vic:
Why would I?
Earl Keese:
You just did.
Vic:
I didn't mean anything - it's just something a guy says.
Earl Keese:
I never say it.
Vic:
I don't blame you.
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Concerns About Shower Experiences
Ramona:
God, does it always shrivel up like that when you shower?
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Reflecting on Past Friendships
Ramona:
I was real friendly with a boy named Earl once - well, twice really.
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Embracing the Unexpected in Chaos
Earl Keese:
This is crazy... but there's something so right about it.
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Understanding Women from Different Perspectives
Vic:
Believe me, I know women - upside down and backwards, which is not a bad way to know em, huh?
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Speculating on Unexpected Parenthood
Vic:
We haven't any children, unless Ramona just pumped one out and didn't tell me about it.
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Reflections on Relationships and Reality
Vic:
We might have a wonderful relationship. But then, as Arthur Bremer once said: "How many things go right in this crazy world?
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Request to go to the swamp
Vic:
We'll get your jacket later. Right now, take me to THE SWAMP.
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Choosing to leave the dead zone behind
Vic:
Stay here on the outer limits of the dead zone? Nothing personal, but life at the end of the road just ain't for Captain Vic and Empress Ramona. Sorry, folks, but you can color us gone.
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A Humorous Take on Unconventional Flavors
Vic:
Hey, Earl, want some of your daughter's panties? They come in four flavors; banana, peach, mint and, of course, CHERRY.
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