Open Season (2006) - Quotes

Taglines: From Mild To Wild.

Taglines: The Odd Are About To Get Even.

Taglines: Boyz N The Wood.

Taglines: The Season Is Changing.

Taglines: One Fur All & All Fur One.

Beth: You are home. I'm so proud of you.

Elliot: So how are we both going to fit in the helicopter? She is coming back, right?

Boog: Who?

Elliot: The shorts lady. Boog?!

Boog: Hey, big guy.

Reilly: What's up, Tiny?

Boog: What's up?

Elliot: You said that we...

Maria: You're judging me?

Boog: How y’all doing?

Maria: Hey, Boog.

Rosie: Hi, Boog.

Maria: I know he is a duck. But he treats me like a lady.

Elliot: But she's...

Buddy: Hey, Buddy.

Boog: Hey, find me some food.

Elliot: Come on. What is our pickup time?

Boog: Elliot, we're staying here. This is our home. These are our people. This is where we reside.

Elliot: What? Are you insane? Where have you been for the last two days? This place is horrible. Horrible.

Ian: Hey, guys.

Boog: What's up, Ian?

Ian: [''grunts''] Uh-oh. Ah, ah, ah. Ow.

Boog: Come on, Elliot. It ain't that bad.

Elliot: She's at least gonna bring some Woo Hoo bars, right?

Boog: It's just the two of us, Elliot. Unless you plan on going back to your herd.

Elliot: What? And break up the team? Bros before does.

Boog: Yeah. Bros before does.

Giselle: Hello, Elliot.

Elliot: [chuckles; ''saw buzzing, tree creaking''] Catch ya later, Boog.

Boog: Aah!

Reilly: Ah-ha-ha!

McSquizzy: [''Mr. Weenie's bark''] Hey! Get off my trees, you bucktoothed sporran!

Boog: [''chuckles''] Wow! Feels like home, baby.

Elliot: Hey, BOOG!!!

Boog: [Elliot fights with rabbits as plays "Love You In The Fall" by Paul Westerberg] Oh!

Ian: Rabbit fight!

Boog: Oh yeah! Will eat rabbit! Unh! Oh! Ah! Oh! Whoa!

Buddy: Buddy!

Boog: WOW!

Singer: I love you in the fall, I never forget you at all. I love you in the fall, I never forget you at all.

Boobie: Bob? Bob!

Shaw: Huh? (He is hit by RV van)

Boobie: [[w:Skylanders Trap Team|high fives] (laughing) A real live homo-sasquatchus! (Bobbie and Bob do ])

Shaw: [gasps, last words] Huh? Wait, wait, no, no! NOOOOO!

Singer: [resume credits; next plays "Wild Is Wanna Be" and "Meet in the Meadow" plays] Random

Boog: Beth?

Beth: [''Boog licks her as she laughs''] Boog? Oh, Boog.

Reilly: What’s he doing?

McSquizzy: Is he not gonna maul her?

Elliot: No. She's his mom. She's taking us home.

Buddy: Everybody?

Boog: Are you all right, Elliot?

Elliot: [his remaining antler cracks off and Boog laughs] (whispering) I'm a little light-headed.

Reilly the beaver: Hey, Tiny. Nice show.

Animals: (chanting) Boog. Boog. Boog.

Boog: Behold, the mighty grizzly!

Elliot: Boog? Boog, are you awake?

Boog: [Long pause] I am now.

Elliot: Awesome. I was watching you sleep last night and you were like a little angel. Except for you're fat and snoring like: (imitates snoring) We're gonna work on that, though. I invented this cure where you stick your whole hand in your mouth.

Gordy: Are you okay?

Beth: I took him above the falls. (sighs) I hope I did the right thing.

Gordy: Don't worry, Beth. I hope that Boog is happy in new home.

Boog: Oh! Stupid nature! (looks at Shaw's house) Civilization.

Boog: Elliot, this is the same dang dam. We've been goin in circles!

Elliot: Cir-cle. (whispering) One time around.

Boog: Ugh! You don't even know where WE GO!

Shaw: (shoots from his gun to the tree. Boog and Elliot hide) YO! Haaa! Wahoo!!! Got them, Lorraine! Haha! (imitates electric guitar, next he jumps into the truck)

Boog: (terrified) What was that?! (he looks at the beavers)

Beaver O'Toole: [shocked] Hunters?! What're they doing up here?!

Beaver Reilly: Okay, boys. Take cover!

Elliot: Boog, we got to hide.

Boog: I'm outta here! (he storms off, trying to cross the dam)

Elliot: Huh. I guess I will be mounted on the wall.

Boog: (sighs) Oh, no, you won't. Now, when I'm a bearskin rug, they can walk all over me. But until that happens, I ain't going out without a fight.

Animals: What? Fight? What he did say?

Buddy: The F word?

Boog: That's right. If there's one thing you all have taught me. The woods is a messed-up, dangerous place. And you all are crazy. You've been kicking my butt for the last two days.

Animals: Yeah. Kind of did.

Serge: I didn't.

Buddy: Sorry.

Boog: So, let's do to them what you've been doing to me. Now, I say we give our guests the full outdoor experience.

Animals: Yeah.

McSquizzy: Hey!

Boog: Ouch!

McSquizzy: [''The Furry Tail Clan appear''] Is this a private fight or can anybody join? Because McSquizzy wants in.

The Furry Tail Clan: Oy!

Boog: Good. Because we'll need your nuts.

Elliot: And your acorns too.

Giselle: What's the plan, Boog?

Boog: Oh, we're going to run those yahoos back to town. Yeah, baby. When we get through with them, they won't ever come back.

Boog: All right, fishies. Give it up for Boog! (Fish fighting)

Elliot: [''Boog shakes the head in water''] (singing) We're going out walking... ...and after midnight searching for Boog

Boog: (farts) Uh-oh. Uh... Hey, Incredible Mister E.

Elliot: Yes, Boogster?

Boog: I got to go.

Elliot: Well, go.

Boog: Well, what do you do?

Elliot: You know… …I can't remember. But listen. Don't look now, but I see a little bush with your name written all over it.

Boog: A bush? Are you serious?

Elliot: Go on. It's just like riding a bicycle. Only, you're crapping on it.

Elliot: Show us your "grrr" face, nature boy. Grrr!

McSquizzy: I bet my nuts that big hairy choob can't do it.

Squirrel: I'll take a piece of that action.

Boog: What is wrong with you animals?

Elliot: Perhaps some roughage, buddy?

Buddy: Buddy.

Boog: (Maria and Rosie approach him) Perhaps some privacy?

Maria the Skunk: What do you think you're doing on my house?

Boog: Is this your house? Oh, I... I didn't know... I...

Rosie the Skunk: It would probably be an improvement.

Maria the Skunk: What did you just say to me, Rosie?

Rosie the Skunk: Nothing. Why you got to be so sensitive?

Elliot: Boogster, what's the dealio?

Maria the Skunk: You watch your mouth or you're going to get yourself in a lot of trouble, girlfriend.

Rosie the Skunk: You're just jealous because you ain't got a man!

Boog: I don't know. Some kind of chick fight.

Maria the Skunk: Let's go there, honey.

Boog: Um... Elliot, what do I do?!

Elliot: Well, that's easy. You just got to mark your territory. Show them who's boss.

Boog: [nods; ''Maria and Rosie stare''] Alright, ladies. I'm laying down the law.

Elliot: Unless, of course, they are skunks.

Boog: (Maria and Rosie spray at him) (groans) Disgusting!!! (he runs away)

Elliot: Wow. (he looks at Giselle) Giselle.

Boog: [Boog runs to the river and washes himself with some water, then dries himself with some rabbits; pause; ducks quack] Uh, ridiculous! The woods is no place for a *bear!* Ducks? Look, now don’t move.

Buddy: It's a pet.

Reilly: He's going to blow our cover.

Mr. Weenie the Dog: [''rips off his shirt''] (stops growling as Elliot gives him a smile, then sighs) I have been living a lie. Please, take me with you.

Elliot: Wow.

Ian: [''all the deers laugh''; ''The herd instead of it make an oval shape''; ''The herd make a circle shape''] Hello, "Smelliot." (laughs) I called him Smelliot. Herd, circle formation! You pinheads, that's an oval. More circle-y! You got a lot of nerve coming back here.

Elliot: Why, thank you.

Ian: That was not a compliment, mag-got!

Giselle: Well. He was just going. Right, Elliot?

Elliot: Yeah, Ian. I had to stop by and say hello to some of my old pals. Bob, Kevin. Jurgen, how’s the knee?

Ian: I told you to leave the herd, and never, ever, ever...

Elliot: Never?

Ian: Never, ever, ever come back.

Elliot: Back? I'm not... I’m not back. Me and my best buddy are heading to town. Yeah. I sure am going to miss you guys.

Ian: [''he tosses Elliot into the air''] Off the upholstery!

Boog: [''annoyed''; ''Elliot screams and falls unconscious to the ground''] Oh, what now?

Ian: [''Boog growls loudly''] So as I was saying, never, ever, ever... A bear! Bear. Bear. A bear.

Boog: Elliot? Are you all right?

Elliot: [''confused''] Buttermilk biscuits.

Deer: Hey, Ian, get a load of this.

Boog: Hey! Cut it out!

Ian: Oh, I've heard of you. You're that bear that got his butt thumped by a squirrel. Ooh.

Boog: It was... there was 20 of them. And they had nuts.

Elliot: Don't listen to him, Boog.

Ian: Boog? What is that short for? Booger?

Deer: Ha! Booger!

Boog: Listen, you.

Ian: I'm all ears.

Boog: Well…

Elliot: Boog, let's go.

Ian: You two are perfect for each other. You're a loser and you're a loser-er. Herd, let's bound! Hey, Elliot. I think you lost something.

Giselle: Maybe it will grow back. Bye, Elliot.

Elliot: Yeah, see you.

Ian: See you later, backpack boy.

Boog: That's right, fool. You better run. Keep on prancin', you panty-waisted cow.

Boog: (gasps) Oh, no.

Shaw: [''enters the shack] Deers, skunks, beavers.

Boog: (horrified) I got to hide.

Shaw: That bear’s turned them all!

Shaw: (he puts his gun on the rocking chair and puts the blanket on it) Here you go, Lorraine. There. You get good and dry. Come morning, we got a rebellion to crush. (he takes out Elliot's antler) And then I'm going to take back, what's mine! (he puts antler on the trophy)

Boog: (whispering) Elliot.

Shaw: (he opens the fridge) Huh? Someone's been eating my candy.

Shaw: [''he sees his overturned chair''; ''sniffs, looks at the toilet. He goes to toilet door.''] Huh? (he grabs the chair and throws it to the floor) Somebody has been sitting in my chair! Somebody forgot to flush!

Shaw: If I don't stop them, it will be a total reversal of the natural order. They laugh at old Shaw, but you'll see. The truth will be revealed.

Bobbie: Oh. We know exactly what you mean.

Shaw: You do?

Bobbie: We are scientists. Well, of sorts and we're trying to secure photografic documentation of real, live homo-sasquatchus.

Shaw: Homo-say-what-us?

Bobbie: We're looking for Bigfoot.

Shaw: [''referring to Mr. Weenie''] Huh? Bigfoot? Oh. I didn't realize I was talking to a couple of wack jobs. Don't trust him. Pets are double agents. The moment you turn your back, he'll shiv you. (he begins to leave as he eats marshmallows and throws the stick)

Bobbie: Oh, no, he can't. We had him fixed.

Elliot: [''after seeing Boog's bowl with his name on it''; ''chuckles''] Oh. I get it. You're like a pet.

Boog: I ain't nobody's pet.

Elliot: [''holding Boog's bowl''] Right.

Boog: [groaning] I do what I want, when I want and I come and go as I please.

Woman: You know? I heard Boog got loose last night and he totally trashed the place.

Man: Really?

Woman: That's what happened.

Shaw: [''he sees Elliot walking around on two legs and drinking some coffee he found in a nearby dumpster''; ''Elliot screams in terror, as he began to flee''] There's something wrong going on here. You? It walks like a man! (chases after Elliot) Hold still, you two-legged latte drinker.

Woman: [''screams''] Look out!

Gordy: [''groans''] Not again.

Beth: Boog will have you eating out of his paw. (chuckles) Get it? Paw? Because he's a bear? (laughs) So, anyway.

Boog: Oh man. Okay. Relax, Boog. You can do this. (notices Elliot) What the...?

Elliot: (closes the door) I gotta hide. I gotta hide.

Boog: What're you doing? Get out of here! Hey!

Elliot: He's right behind me.

Shaw: I knew it! That bear has corrupted my buck!

Elliot: [''screams''] Hide me!

Reilly: OK, ladies. This dam ain't going to build itself. Lift that birch. Swing those pines over here. Come on. Move it. (whistles) Yo, O'Toole!

O'Toole: Yeah, boss?

Reilly: I want you to cantilever that cedar on the bias down by the north end, you got that?!

O'Toole: Huh?

Reilly: Um! Put the twig in the hole.

O'Toole: Oh.

Reilly: [''whistles''] Rookie. Take five for lunch! Um, what do you got?

O'Toole: Wood. What do you got?

Reilly: [''gasps silently''] Wood. You want to trade? (O'Toole and he trade the woods) Hey, hey, guys. Check it out. There goes the largest carnivore in North America. The mighty grizzly.

Elliot: [Beavers look at themselves and laugh] And he's a good dancer. We're going to be in a show.

Boog: [''grabs Elliot's antler''] Come here!

Elliot: Ow, ow, ow. Hey, that's my good antler.

Boog: (drops Elliot) Listen, simple. We are not we. It's just me and we ain't doing no show.

Elliot: (scoffs) Diva.

Boog: What?!

Elliot: I understand what's going on here. You're a little crabby, because you're hungry.

Boog: I, I…

Elliot: Hmm? Hmm? I think yes.

Boog: (sniffs) I'm starving!

Shaw: [''chuckles] I hope I'm not too late. They've been out here all night. The bear... And the deer work together. How far does this conspiracy go? How many animals are involved? God bless America! I hope the bald eagle hasn't turned! No, no, no. Maybe they're right. Maybe... Maybe old Shaw is crazy. Yeah, maybe. (he notices the dog, then he loses control)

Elliot: Ian's right, I'm a loser.

Boog: No, you're not a loser.

Elliot: Yes, I am.

Boog: No, you're not.

Elliot: Yes.

Boog: No.

Elliot: Trust me. You know the day I met you, Ian kicked me out of the herd. I lost my antler, I got run over, and tied to the hood of a truck. What do you call that?

Boog: Uh, a loser. But check this out. Behold, the mighty grizzly! I look like a bear, I talk like a bear. But I can't fish, I can't climb a tree, I can't even go in the woods.

Elliot: That's nothing. Half doe, half buck. I'm a duck.

Boog: I ride a unicycle for crackers.

Elliot: I have a glass eye.

Boog: I can't snap.

Elliot: I thought log was a color.

Boog: I can't see my feet.

Elliot: I killed a man.

Elliot: [sighs] Well, at least you've got a home.

Boog: Home. Yeah. I sure hope so.