3 quotes
Allowance Consequences in Parenting Discussion
Junior
Please don't spank me, Mr. Healy.
Ben Healy
Well, Junior, I don't want to, but you're gonna have to be punished. So, I'm gonna take back your allowance.
Junior
The whole buck?
Ben Healy
That's right. Now, just hand it over.
Junior
I wonder if he's got change for a twenty.
[thinking out loud]
Ben Healy
Okay. Now, I think you'd better go right to bed. I want you to use this time to think about what you've done and what you're going to do. You understand? Well, I hope you've learned a lesson. Good night.
Junior
What is this guy, nice or something?
[thinking out loud]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Adopting Chaos in Child Rearing
Ben Healy
We've adopted Satan.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Debate on Junior's Alleged Misdeeds
Mr. Peabody
Will you all please quiet down? Be quiet! Ladies, please, can you quiet down? Can you quiet down? Can you act like nuns?! Okay, now, there is absolutely no proof that Junior was in any way connected with today's tragedy.
Sister
Who needs proof? He's evil!
Sister
Look what he did in art class. Skeletons!
Sister
Headless corpses!
Sister
Monsters devouring human flesh!
Mr. Peabody
All right, look! I don't claim to be some kind of brilliant psychologist. I'm not. All I'm saying is maybe all the child needs is to be loved.
Mother Superior
Let's cut the crap, Mr. Peabody! Either Junior goes or you find yourself some new nuns.
Mr. Peabody
No, no, please, don't hyperventilate. Just take a deep breath and relax. The only way we can straighten this out is by hearing what Junior has to say about it.
Junior
I'm sorry, sisters. Please, please don't make me lift those heavy stones and please don't make me scrub those dirty toilets. I just wanna be a good boy. I promise!
Mr. Peabody
You see that? He said he's sorry.
Junior
Please, give me another chance. I just want to learn my lessons and do my studies so I can be smart and become a priest!
Mr. Peabody
There, you see that? A priest! It's like a nun with a jacket. It's a boy nun! He wants to be a boy nun. Let me tell you something. It takes a big man to admit his mistakes, and there is a big man! It is in the opinion of myself and my agency of which I represent that Junior will not be removed from this orphanage.
Junior
Removed? What do you mean, removed?
Mr. Peabody
Oh, don't worry about it, Junior. You see, the nuns just made a suggestion that you'd might be happier outside of the orphanage. What's so funny?
Junior
You are, you stupid dick!
Sister
You see? He's wicked!
Mr. Peabody
You're saying that you'd rather not be in the orphanage, are you?
Junior
D'oi! Think much, pea-brain? I want out!
Mother Superior
You see, Mr. Peabody? The child's incorrigible!
Junior
I'm what? Why don't you speak English, lady?
Mr. Peabody
Maybe...
Junior
Maybe...
Mr. Peabody
What the child is trying to say is that...
Junior
Maybe if I shrug my shoulders and move around my hands like this, people will think I know what I'm talking about.
Mr. Peabody
It's obvious that the kid is unbalanced. I knew that from the start. I was playing devil's advocate. Devil, you know... Anyway, on behalf of myself and the agency, this child is going to be removed from this orphanage as soon as possible!
Junior
Well, hurry the hell up! I'm not getting any younger!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.