Sexy Beast Quotes

Taglines Yes or Yes?

Don I fucked Jackie. Fucked her. Ask her, she'll tell you. I fucked her.

Aitch Yeah, well I've fucked you now, haven't I?

Teddy Bass Gentlemen! You're all cunts.

Taglines Sometimes It's Hard To Say No.

Don Logan But quite frankly your attitude appalls me. It's not what you're saying. It's all this stuff you're not saying. Insinnuendos.

Taglines There's a bit of the beast in all of us.

Aitch Look, with this pill, they say you take it and that's it. Your hair don't grow, you don't go bald, it stays the same. You have your hair cut once, in whatever style you want, and it stays like that for the rest of your natural life. It's completely revolutionary.

Jackie What if you get fed up with your style, you berk?

Aitch Ahh... Well, that's where the antidote comes in. The whole process is reversible. You just take a different pill. Now, I'm not saying this is gonna happen next year but it will happen, it's definitely coming. Hairdressers are shitting themselves.

Jackie Shut up!

Aitch They did a test with three monkeys, right? Gave em all a Beatles-style haircut. They've been living with that cut for the past two years. And apparently, they're very happy with it.

Don Logan Yeah, that's what I said. There's me putting my bag up in the cupboard next thing ya know, I feel hands on me. Someone's touched me, touched my front... my front bottom. I can't believe it, I've gone all cold. I look around, he standing there isn't he? That steward with the guilty look on his face. I was shocked, I didn't know what to say. I had to sit down, I was that perturbed. Then his mate, the other one who was giving us all lessons on what we do if we land in the sea. How to wear your life jacket etc; He starts off, he starts looking at my all funny... suggestive. Now I don't know if they're wanting me for a twosome or something, I don't know how they work it. But I'll tell you what, it scared me. I was shaking like a leaf, so without thinking I lit up a cigarette to calm me nerves. I was trembling, I was very emotional and that when all the rest of it happened. It's very regrettable. Now, I don't want to kick up a fuss, right, press charges... contact the British embassy. I'd rather not pursue those channels, that's not my style. I'm not that sort of a bloke. I don't want to lose the man his job. Man's got to eat. And I'm sure he's not representative of all you Spanish people. But I would appreciate it if you had a word with him, let him know he's been rumbled. The one with the ginger hair.

Don Logan Not this time, Gal. Not this time. Not this fucking time. No. No no no no no no no no no! No! No no no no no no no no no no no no no! No! Not this fucking time! No fucking way! No fucking way, no fucking way, no fucking way! You've made me look a right cunt!

Don Logan Shut up, cunt. You louse. You got some fuckin neck ain't you. Retired? Fuck off, you're revolting. Look at your suntan, it's leather, it's like leather man, your skin. We could make a fucking suitcase out of you. Holdall. Like a crocodile, fat crocodile, fat bastard. You look like fucking Idi Amin, you know what I mean? Stay here? You should be ashamed of yourself. Who do you think you are? King of the castle? Cock of the walk? What you think this is the ]? You think you can make your dough and fuck off? Leave the table? Thanks Don, see you Don, off to sunny Spain now Don, fuck off Don. Lying in your pool like a fat blob laughing at me, you think I'm gonna have that? You really think I'm gonna have that, ya ponce. All right, I'll make it easy for you. God knows you're fucking trying. Are you gonna do the job? It's not a difficult question, are you gonna do the job, yes or no?

Don Logan I fucked Jackie. Dirty cow. During what we were doing, she tried to stick her finger up my bum. I nearly hit the roof, you can imagine. I mean, what have you got to think of a woman who'd want to do that?

Taglines In the Underworld, you never turn down a job.

Gal I'd be useless.

Don Useless?

Gal I would be.

Don In what way?

Gal In every fucking way.

Don Why are you swearing? I'm not swearing.

Don Logan You're on two per cent, two and a half, maybe even three. Depends on the usual bumflufferies. It's not about the money with you and me is it, Gal? It's the charge, it's the bolt, it's the buzz, it's the sheer fuck off-ness of it all. Am I right?

Gary "Gal" Dove People say, "Don't you miss it, Gal?" I say, "What, England? Nah. Fucking place. It's a dump. Don't make me laugh. Grey, grimy, sooty. What a shit hole. What a toilet. Every cunt with a long face shuffling about, moaning, all worried. No thanks, not for me." They say, "What's it like, then, Spain?" And I'll say, "It's hot. Hot. Oh, it's fucking hot. Too hot? Not for me, I love it.

Teddy Bass Where there's a will - and there is a fucking will - there's a way - and there is a fucking way.

Gal No!

Don Yes!

Gal No!

Don Yes!

Gal No!

Don Fat cunt!

Gal No, No, No!

Don Yes, Yes, Yes!

Gary "Gal" Dove You were right Don. Technically speaking, you were right. But you're dead. So shut up.

Don Logan I gotta change my shirt, it's sticking to me. I'm sweating like a cunt.

Don Logan You're the problem! You're the fucking problem you fucking Dr White honkin jam-rag fucking spunk-bubble! I'm telling you Aitch you keep looking at me I'll put you in the fucking ground, promise you!

Don Talk to me, Gal. I'm here for you. I'm a good listener.

Gal What can I say, Don? I've said it all. I'm retired.

Don Shut up.