The Family Man Quotes

Jack Campbell Because you thought I was cocky, I'm now on a permanent acid trip?

Kate Reynolds/Campbell When you got on that plane, I was sure it was over. I left the airport afraid I'd never see you again. And then you showed up the very next day. That was a good surprise. You know, I think about the decision you made... maybe I was being naive, but I believed that we would grow old together in this house. That we'd spend holidays here and have our grandchildren come visit us here. I had this image of us, all grey and wrinkly, and me working in the garden and you re-painting the deck. But things change. If you need this, Jack, if you really need this, I will take these kids from a life they love and I'll take myself from the only home we've ever shared together and I'll move wherever you need to go. I'll do that because I love you. I love you, and that's more important to me than our address. I choose us.

Kate You look amazing in that suit. I mean really - wow! Off the charts, great.

Jack It's an unbelievable thing. Wearing a suit actually makes me feel like a better person. I'm gonna buy it.

Kate It's $2,400. Are you out of your mind? Come on, let's go.

Jack She got those shoes.

Kate Those shoes were $25. Come on. Take it off, all right? We'll go to the food court and get one of those funnel cakes you like. You're daddy's a crazy guy.

Jack Do you have any idea what my life is like?

Kate Excuse me?

Jack I wake up in the morning covered in dog saliva. I drop the kids off, spend 8 hours selling tires retail. Retail, Kate. I pick the kids up, walk the dog, which by the way, carries the added bonus of carting away her monstrous crap. I play with the kids, take out the garbage, get 6 hours of sleep if I'm lucky and then everything starts all over again. So-so what's in it for me? Wh-where are my-my Mary Janes?

Kate You know, it's sad to hear that your life is such a disappointment to you.

Jack I can't believe it isn't a disappointment to you! Jesus, Kate. I could've been a thousand times the man I became. I could have been one of the richest - Forbes - How could you do this to me? How could you let me give up on my dreams like this? Really, I want to know.

Kate Who are you?

Jack All right, look. I'm sorry. I'm sorry I was such a saint before, and I'm such a prick now! But maybe, I'm just not the same guy that I was when we got married.

Kate You know what? Maybe you're not. Because the Jack Campbell I married would not need a $2,400 suit to feel better about his life. But I'm telling you, if that's what it's gonna take, then buy it. Jesus! We'll take the money out of the kids college fund.

Jack Forget it. We'll get a funnel cake. It'll be the highlight of my week.

Jack Well, you know everything worked out. I mean, I like Annie.

Kate Well good, Jack. Maybe we'll keep her.

Jack Campbell I just want my life back, okay? Now what's it gonna take? You wanna talk turkey? Let's talk turkey! HOW MUCH MONEY?

Jack We have a house in Jersey. We have two kids, Annie and Josh. Annie's not much of a violin player, but she tries real hard. She's a little precocious, but that's only because she says what's on her mind. And when she smiles... And Josh, he has your eyes. He doesn't say much, but we know he's smart. He's always got his eyes open, he's always watching us. Sometimes you can look at him and you just know he's learning something new. It's like witnessing a miracle. The house is a mess but it's ours. After 122 more payments, it's going to be ours. And you, you're a non-profit lawyer. That's right, you're completely non-profit, but that doesn't seem to bother you. And we're in love. After 13 years of marriage we're still unbelievably in love. You won't even let me touch you until I've said it. I sing to you. Not all the time, but definitely on special occasions. We've dealt with our share of surprises and made a lot of sacrifices but we've stayed together. You see, you're a better person than I am. And it made me a better person to be around you. I don't know, maybe it was just all a dream. Maybe I went to bed one lonely night in December and I imagined it all. But I swear, nothing has ever felt more real. And if you get on that plane right now, it'll disappear forever. I know we could both go on with our lives and we'd both be fine, but I've seen what we could be like together. And I choose us. Please, Kate. One cup of coffee. You can always go to Paris. Just, please, not tonight.

Kate OK, Jack.

Annie Do you like kids?

Jack On a case-by-case basis.

Annie Do you know how to make chocolate milk?

Jack I think I could figure it out.

Annie Promise you won't kidnap me and my brother and plant stuff in our brains?

Jack Sure.

Annie Welcome to Earth.

Annie They did a pretty good job.

Jack Who did?

Annie The aliens, in the mothership. You look just like him.

Kate So, what's the big surprise? You didn't rent this for the weekend, did you?

Jack Think bigger.

Kate For the week?

Jack This place is a perk, Kate.

Kate A perk? For what?

Jack A company called PK Lassiter investment house. Uses it to attract new executives. I'm going into arbitrage, Kate. It turns out, I have a knack for it.

Kate Jack, what are you talking about?

Jack I'll be making twice what I make now, plus a hefty bonus and that's just the start. And we can live in this apartment practically rent free until we find a place of our own.

Kate Are you out of your mind?

Jack I don't think so. This is gonna be a better life for us. We can put Annie and Josh into private schools...

Kate Annie goes to a great school, Jack.

Jack I'm talking about the best schools in the country here, Kate.

Kate Jack, what could you possibly be thinking about? What about my - what about my job?

Jack Well, this is New York City. It's like the needy people capital of the world. Your Jersey clients aren't a tenth as pathetic as the ones you could find here.

Kate I can't even believe you're talking about moving back into the city, Jack. I thought the reason that we left was because we didn't want to raise the kids here.

Jack No. No. This is the center of the universe. If I were living in Roman times, I would be in Rome. Where else? Today America is the Roman empire. New York is Rome itself. - John Lennon.

Kate Jack!

Jack Listen, Ok, you know something? I'm detecting, like, a funky tension here and this was supposed to be a happy day, so guess what? I don't need this. We don't have to live here. Forget it. I'll commute. I'll drive to work.

Kate God! In traffic, Jack. It's over an hour each way. That's like three hours every day. When are you ever going to see the kids?

Jack Kate. You're not understanding me. I'm talking about a perfect life, a great life. Everything we pictured when we were young. The whole package. You said so yourself. Life is throwing us a few surprises and we made sacrifices. Well, guess what? Now I can finally get us back on track. I can do that, Kate. I want to do that. I-I need to do that as a man! For all of us. Please just think about this for one second. No more lousy restaurants. No more clipping coupons. No more shoveling snow.

Kate Then get a goddamn snowblower, Jack! Don't go get a new career without even telling me about it! And don't - don't take Annie out of a school she loves and don't move us out of a house we've become a family in.

Jack You're-you're... Don't you see? I'm talking about us finally having a life that other people envy.

Kate Jack. They already do envy us.

Kate The kids are asleep...

Kate Jack. I said the kids are asleep...

Jack Well that’s just great...those little monkeys can be a real handful...

Jack Hey! I was watching that!

Kate I thought we had a deal about you watching CNBC in bed.

Jack I’m working on a new deal now...

Kate Fine, but not tonight...

Jack Wait a second. You want me, don’t you?

Kate That is the general idea, yes.

Jack Shouldn’t we grab some dinner first? Maybe a bottle of wine...?

Kate It’s ten thirty, Jack. By eleven you’re gonna be sprawled out on the bed snoring your head off. We don’t have time for wining and dining.

Jack Whatever you say...honey.

Jack God...you’re beautiful.

Kate Thanks, Jack.

Jack No, I’m serious. You’re really stunning.

Kate This is good stuff, Jack, keep it coming.

Jack I mean back in college, you were a very pretty girl, there’s no question about that. But this...you’ve really grown into a beautiful woman.

Kate How can you do that?

Jack Do what?

Kate Look at me like you haven’t seen me every day for the last twelve years. Don’t move.

Kate ‘Night, honey.

Kate What are you sure about?

Jack I'm sure that right now, there's nowhere else I'd rather be than here with you.

Peter Lassiter Old flames are like old tax returns... put em in the file cabinet for three years, then you cut em loose.