27 quotes
A Lighthearted Conversation About Uncertainty
Kermit
Pretty nice up here, isn't it?
[in a hot air balloon]
Fozzie
Kermit? What if we drift out to sea? What if we're never heard from again? What if there's a storm? Or - we get struck by lightning?
Gonzo
That'd be neat.
Kermit
Listen, nothing's gonna happen. These are just the opening credits.
Fozzie
Oh. Where are they? Wow!
[title card appears]
Kermit
The Great Muppet Caper.
Fozzie
Nice title.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Miss Piggy's Stunt Double Declaration
Miss Piggy
Next time they want stunts, they get a double.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Questioning the Color of Justice
Kermit
Now if we want to get Miss Piggy out of jail, we're going to catch those crooks red-handed. Yes, Bo?
[Beauregard raises his hand]
Beauregard
What color are their hands now?
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Oscar the Grouch's Perspective on Life
Guest stars
] as Oscar the Grouch from ]
[[w:Caroll Spinney|Caroll Spinney; [w:Sesame Street|Sesame Street]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Contemplating Future Opportunities in Storytelling
Fozzie
We'll do better next time.
[pleading]
News Editor
Next time? Next time?! What makes you think there's gonna be a next time?
[pounds fist into desk]
Kermit
Well, if there isn't, it's gonna be a real short movie.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Man Reflects in the Park
Guest stars
] - a Man in Park
[[w:Peter Falk|Peter Falk]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Muppet's Perspective on Adventure
The Muppet performers
] - ], Beauregard, ] and ]
[[w:Dave Goelz|Dave Goelz; [w:The Great Gonzo|The Great Gonzo; [w:Dr. Teeth and The Electric Mayhem#Zoot|Zoot; [w:Bunsen Honeydew|Dr. Bunsen Honeydew]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Endings and Perspectives in The Great Muppet Caper
Statler
I guess all's well that ends well.
Waldorf
Doesn't matter to me, as long as it ends.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Muppet Performers Express Their Unique Personalities
The Muppet performers
] - ], ], Beaker, ], ] and Bubba
[[w:Richard Hunt (puppeteer)|Richard Hunt; [w:Scooter (Muppet)|Scooter; [w:Statler and Waldorf|Statler; [w:Dr. Teeth and The Electric Mayhem#Janice|Janice; [w:Sweetums|Sweetums]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Exposition Explained in a Conversation
Miss Piggy
Why are you telling me all this?
Lady Holiday
It's plot exposition. It has to go somewhere.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Race Against Time to the Gallery
Miss Piggy
Do you know where Lady Holliday's Baseball Diamond is being kept?
[to the truck driver]
Truck Driver
Well, funny enough, I do: it's at the Mallory Gallery, a virtually impregnable fortress many miles from here.
Miss Piggy
Oh! I only have a half an hour to get there!
Truck Driver
On foot? You'll never make it.
Miss Piggy
I know! How about a ride?
Truck Driver
You can read, I presume? "No passengers.
[points to the sticker on the truck's door]
Miss Piggy
Oh, couldn't you make an exception for little old moi?
Truck Driver
Not even for little old vous.
[laughs]
Miss Piggy
Pretty please?
Truck Driver
No!
Miss Piggy
I've tried to be nice.
[strained]
Truck Driver
Huh?
Miss Piggy
Hii-yahh!
[throws the driver out of his truck and into the garbage cans]
Oscar the Grouch
Hey, what's all the racket?
[emerges from a trash can]
Truck Driver
What are you doing here?
Oscar the Grouch
A very brief cameo.
Truck Driver
Me too. Tsk tsk.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Kermit Reassures Ms. Piggy in Crisis
Kermit
Don't worry Ms. Piggy, will you get out of this?!
[to Cops got Miss Piggy takes her away]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Unanswered Questions Among Friends
Fozzie
What does "BSC" stand for?
Kermit
I don't know.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Unexpected Wisdom from a Truck Driver
Guest stars
] - a Truck Driver
[[Peter Ustinov]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Muppet Characters in Playful Interaction
The Muppet performers
] - ], ], ], ], Green Frackle, ], ], Timmy Monster, and Lubbock Lou
[[Jim Henson; [w:Kermit the Frog|Kermit the Frog; [w:Rowlf the Dog|Rowlf the Dog; [w:Dr. Teeth and The Electric Mayhem#Dr. Teeth|Dr. Teeth; [w:Statler and Waldorf|Waldorf; [w:Swedish Chef|The Swedish Chef; [w:The Newsman|The Newsman]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A British Gentleman by the Pond
Guest stars
] - a British Gentleman by Pond
[[Robert Morley]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Beauty Standards and Personal Preferences
Nicky Holiday
Miss Piggy...You're a very different looking woman. I'm so tired of the same type, those tall thin creatures with the long legs, the aquiline noses, the teeth like pearls, soft skin...
Miss Piggy
Yeah, well, I can see where that might make you sick to your stomach.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
The Role of the Villain in Film
Kermit
Why are you doing this?
Nicky
Why am I doing this? Because I'm a villain, pure and simple. Every good movie needs one.
Kermit
I hate to admit it, but that's an excellent point.
[breaking the 4th wall - again]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Muppet Performers Express Their Unique Perspectives
The Muppet performers
] - ], ], Pink Frackle and Zeke
[[w:Steve Whitmire|Steve Whitmire; [w:Rizzo the Rat|Rizzo the Rat; [w:Dr. Teeth and The Electric Mayhem#Lips|Lips]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Muppet Performers Highlight Their Unique Style
The Muppet performers
] - ], ], ], ] and Gramps
[[Frank Oz; [w:Fozzie Bear|Fozzie Bear; [w:Miss Piggy|Miss Piggy; [w:Dr. Teeth and The Electric Mayhem#Animal|Animal; [w:Sam Eagle|Sam the Eagle]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Confrontation and Accusation of Deceit
Miss Piggy
You! It was you! Kermit was right! You are bulking! You are a phony! Yes, you are! And you know what, you can't even sing! Your voice was dubbed!
[to Nicky]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Editorial Insight from The Daily Chronicle
Guest stars
] - Mike Tarkenian, the editor-in-chief of The Daily Chronicle.
[[w:Jack Warden|Jack Warden]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Neville's Life at 17 Highbrow Street
Guest stars
] as Neville, a middle-aged British homeowner who lives with his wife Dorcas at 17 Highbrow Street.
[[John Cleese]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Muppet Performers Share Their Unique Perspectives
The Muppet performers
] - Crazy Harry, ], ], ], Louis Kazagger and Slim Wilson
[[w:Jerry Nelson|Jerry Nelson; [w:Dr. Teeth and The Electric Mayhem#Floyd Pepper|Floyd Pepper; [w:Pops (Muppet)|Pops; [w:Lew Zealand|Lew Zealand]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Misidentifying Animals in a Humorous Exchange
Christine Nelson
Look, Dad. There's a bear.
Jerry Nelson
No, Christine, that's a frog. Bears wear hats.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Overacting in a Moment of Pleading
Miss Piggy
Please don't go. Kermit, please. Oh, please, I'm sorry. Please! Please!
Kermit
Piggy, hold it.
Miss Piggy
Please! Please! Please!
Kermit
Piggy...? Piggy? You're overacting.
Miss Piggy
...What?
Kermit
You'e overacting. You're hamming it up.
Miss Piggy
I am not. I am trying to save this movie.
Kermit
Oh, yeah? Well, save your performance instead.
[getting annoyed]
Miss Piggy
I am playing eight hundred different emotions!
Kermit
Well, try to play one of them right.
Miss Piggy
Oh, oh! I have a career of my own.
Kermit
I know all about your career, Pig.
Miss Piggy
I don't need this lousy duck pond here.
Kermit
Sure, you don't need a lousy duck pond.
Miss Piggy
I'll just walk.
Kermit
Okay, sure. Go ahead and walk.
[angrily]
Miss Piggy
Should I walk? Then I'll walk!
[briefly turning to the camera]
Kermit
Walk! Go ahead and walk! Oh, Piggy. Listen.
[Miss Piggy turns away and whimpers; sighs]
Miss Piggy
I'm doing my best.
[in tears]
Kermit
Well... I know you are. Piggy, I'm sorry. We gotta get back to the movie, though.
[moves in to comfort her]
Miss Piggy
All right. All right, all right, all right.
[trying to collect herself; heaves a heavy sigh and resumes acting]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Muppet's Perspective on Performance and Dreams
The Muppet performers
Louise Gold as Annie Sue Pig and Lou
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.