The Love Letter Quotes

Janet Okay. Well, here are your books. Uh, the Complete Idiots Guide to Surviving Divorce, The Divorce Workbook, and of course, how come nobody loves me?

Taglines No one knows who sent it. No one knows who it's for. But everyone's getting the same message.

Johnny No one knows what they want, Jennifer. That's the human condition.

Jennifer Some people know what they want. I mean, they might not know how to get it but they know what they want.

Janet Daddy's going to play with his fire hose. That's didn't sound right.

Miss Scattergoods I do think, dear, that, whenever I get the urge to exercise, I lie down until it passes over.

Janet *BE* careful! Get it?

Lillian So, there are you darling, Mommy's a dyke.

Lillian It's one of the ironies of my otherwise straight forward life that I have fallen in love twice. Both times with people who insist on living in this godforsaken town.

Miss Scattergoods A thinning gene pool is a terrible thing to witness. Ah, civilization's crowing achievement: the cocktail hour.

Janet ...so that is my feelings on salt and pepper and sugar. Condiments: let's move onto that. Ketchup: obviously the most popular condiment. I don't think anybody's going to disagree with me on that one. First of all, always wipe the bottles down. Sticky: there's nothing grosser than that. I mean, I'm sure there's something grosser... but it's pretty gross to have it sticky when you're trying to have a...

Johnny I've never felt this way before.

Helen Of course not. You're twenty.