Name: Up in Smoke
Genre: Adventure, Comedy
Released: 1978-09-15
Duration: 86 min
Rating: 6.6
Cast: Cheech Marin, Tommy Chong, Strother Martin, Edie Adams, Harold Fong

Up in Smoke

The Effects of Nam Grass on Users

Man Stoner Yeah, that Nam grass will fuck anyone up, man!

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Up in Smoke

Confusion Over Basketball Identity

Sgt. Stedenko Now just how well do you know that freak with the basketball?

Unknown Which basketball?

Sgt. Stedenko Which basketball?

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Up in Smoke

Unexpected Complaints from Sgt. Stedenko

Sgt. Stedenko Some asshole pissed on my leg!

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Up in Smoke

Casual Conversation About Speed and Comfort

Man Stoner Ohhh! Ohhh!

Pedro Hey, man, how far you goin', man?

Man Stoner Oh, right here would be fine, man!

[points to the curb]

Pedro Oh, you ain't scared of a little speed, are ya, man?

Man Stoner Wha, you got some speed, man?

Pedro Huh? Oh. Speed? Uh, no, I ain't got no speed, man. But you know what I do got, though, man? I got a joint, man!

Man Stoner Oh, wow. Alright.

Pedro Here, light that thing up, man, let's get Chinese-eyed, man.

[gets it out and hands it to Man]

Man Stoner What kind of joint is this, man?

[eyeing the joint]

Pedro Oh, it's a heavy duty joint, man.

Man Stoner Looks like a toothpick, man.

Pedro Naw, it's not a toothpick, man.

Man Stoner Hey, it IS a toothpick, man.

Pedro Aw, man, it's... it IS a toothpick! I must got it in another pocket, man. Hold on, I got the shit right here, man. Oh, that's my dick. Yeah, there we go. Hey, there you go, man. Light that sucker up, man. And go to the moon.

[looking at it, puzzled; feels around in his pocket; feels around some more; hands a skinny, curled up joint to Man]

Man Stoner Jeez, I hope your dick's bigger than this, man.

[looking at a dinky little joint]

Pedro Hey, man, you wanna get out and walk, man?

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Up in Smoke

License Confusion During a Traffic Stop

Arresting Officer Sir, could I please see your license?

Pedro Whuut?

Arresting Officer Your license. Where's your license?

Pedro My license? It's on the bumper, man, back there, man!

Arresting Officer No, I mean your DRIVER'S license.

Pedro Oh. Oh, yeah, I got my driver's license, man... Hey, I thought'a somethin really funny, man... Your mother!

[gets the license with great difficulty; laughs]

Arresting Officer Sir, what's your name?

[after dirty look, of course]

Pedro Uuhhh... Isn't it on the license, man? Yeah, that's it! Pedro De Pacas, man, that's my name...

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Up in Smoke

Uncertainty and Humor in a Boat Scene

Pedro Way anchor! How much does it weigh? I don't know, I forgot! Pffhhh! Ha-ha, I saw that in a movie once...!

[laughing while stoned]

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Up in Smoke

Humor in Religious Dietary Restrictions

Sgt. Stedenko The only kind of meat a priest could eat on Friday was nun.

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Up in Smoke

Unexpected Humor in Adverse Situations

Man Stoner Yeah, I know, but listen. I slept in a ditch last night, man, I almost froze my balls off, man.

Pedro de Pacas Hey, I didn't think you had any, man. I wouldn't even have stopped.

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Up in Smoke

A Generous Offer During an Unexpected Encounter

Cop What do you guys want?

Pedro Nothing.

Cop Hey, do you mind if I have a, bite of your hot dog?

Pedro Huh? No, man, here, take the whole thing. Want some fritos?

[the cop takes a huge bite]

Cop No, this is fine! Thank you! Hey, you fellas have a nice day, okay?

[through a mouthful of hot dog]

Man Stoner Hey, man, what was that dude's trip? I mean, what was he on, man?

Pedro Man, I don't know, but I wish we had some of it!

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Up in Smoke

A Conversation About Discomfort

Man Stoner Man, my legs hurt.

Pedro Yeah, I bet!

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Up in Smoke

Embracing the Highs of Life

Man Stoner Toke, toke it up, man! Kinda grabs ya by the boo-boo, don't it?

[Pedro starts toking on the giant joint; Pedro starts choking]

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Up in Smoke

Unexpected Effects of Poor Quality Marijuana

Curtis This shit is so bad, it'll put a hump on a camel's back.

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Up in Smoke

Character's Revelation About the Antichrist

Arnold Stoner Dear God, almighty me... I think he's the Antichrist.

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Up in Smoke

Misunderstanding About Driving and Parking

Pedro Hey, man, am I driving okay?

Man Stoner I think we're parked, man.

[looks around]

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Up in Smoke

Appreciating Nature in Conversation

Strawberry Ahhh, look at that, man, the great outdoors, huh!

Pedro Yeah, the great outdoors...

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Up in Smoke

Embracing Punk Rock Identity

Pedro It's punk rock, Man! We can do that; we can be punks, Man!

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Up in Smoke

A Casual Reference to a Joint

Man Stoner El roacho.

[discovered, roach on an ashtray]

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Up in Smoke

Meeting at the Border

Toyota Kawasaki This is Toyota Kawasaki here at the Mexican-United States border.

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Up in Smoke

Family Tensions and Unconventional Advice

Arnold Stoner Sweetheart, I'll talk to him. Son, your mother and me would like for you to cozy up to the Finkelstein boy. He's a bright kid, and, uh... he's going to military school, and... remember, he was an Eagle Scout...

[to wife, off camera; to Anthony "Man", as he makes a fruit smoothie]

Mrs. Tempest Stoner Arnold...

Arnold Stoner Will you shut up? We're going to have a family brawl!

[shouting as his wife continues]

Mrs. Tempest Stoner ...and a retard!

Arnold Stoner We've put up with a hell of a lot. Can this wait? Build your goddamn muscles, huh? You know, you could build your muscles picking strawberries. You know, bend and scoop... like the Mexicans. Shit, maybe I could get you a job with United Fruit! I got a buddy with United Fruit. Get you started. Start with strawberries, you might work your way up to these goddamn bananas! When, boy? When... are you going to get your act together?

[Anthony starts blender; Anthony turns off blender and pours contents into tall glass; Anthony drinks from glass as his father shouts]

Mrs. Tempest Stoner Gross!

[in disgust]

Arnold Stoner Oh, good God Almighty me. I think he's the Antichrist. Anthony, I want to talk to you. Now, listen! Don't walk away from me when I'm talking to you! You get a goddamn job before sundown...

[rubs his forehead with his hand; turns to his son; Anthony walks away and gives an obscene gesture behind his back]

Mrs. Tempest Stoner Is that some kind of peace sign?

[pointing to Anthony as he walks away]

Arnold Stoner ...or we're shipping you off to military school with that... goddamn Finkelstein... shit kid! Son of a BITCH!

[turns away in frustration]

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Up in Smoke

Uniforms with Individuality in Up in Smoke

Man Stoner No, hey, man, if we're gonna wear uniforms, man, you know let's have everybody wear something different.

Pedro Yea, that's it. Yea, we want something where everybody wears something different, man, but the same, you know?

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Up in Smoke

Immigration Service Misunderstanding at a Wedding

Pedro Don't worry, man. Those aren't narcs, they're Las Emigras; you know, the Immigration Service looking for illegal aliens.

Man Stoner What's the Immigration Service doing here, man?

Pedro My cousin needed a ride to his brother's wedding in Tijuana; so he called the Emigras, man. They'll deport the entire wedding party, man. They get a free bus ride across the border and lunch. When the wedding is over, man, they'll just come back across the border.

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Up in Smoke

A Playful Exchange About Getting High

Man You wanna get high, man?

Pedro Does Howdy Doody have wooden Balls, man?

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Up in Smoke

Search for Illegal Substances in Conversation

Toyota Kawasaki Sgt. Stedenko, what are you exactly looking for?

Sgt. Stedenko Dope, drugs, weed, grass, toot, smack, quackers, uppers, downers, all arounders. You name it, we want it!

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Up in Smoke

Confusion Over Time in Mexico

Border Guard So, how long you've been in Mexico?

Pedro A week. I mean a day.

Border Guard Well, which is it? A week or a day?

Pedro A weekday.

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Up in Smoke

Guaranteed to Make You Laugh

Taglines It will make you feel VERY funny!

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Up in Smoke

Mistaken Substance Exchange Among Friends

Man Stoner Hey, hey, don't take those, man.

Pedro Wha...?

Man Stoner I almost gave you the wrong shit, man.

Pedro Hey, man, I already took em, man.

Man Stoner Hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo...

[laughing in astonishment]

Pedro Hey, whaddaya mean "ho ho ho ho ho"?

Man Stoner Oh... HU-WOW, MAN!

Pedro Hey, what was that shit, man?

Man Stoner You just take the most acid I've ever seen anybody eat in my life!

Pedro Hey, man, I never had no acid before, man.

Man Stoner Jeez, I hope you're not busy for about a month...

Pedro Hey, I've seen those guys walking around my neighborhood that took too much acid, man. The one guy, his head's swelled up like a pumpkin...

Man Stoner No, that's good acid, man.

[referring to the acid Pedro took]

Pedro Another time, there was this guy...

Up in Smoke

Communication Breakdown Among Characters

Man Stoner Hello, hello, hello, hello, hello, can you hear me?

[on police radio]

Clyde - Narc Hello, headquarters? Hello, headquarters? Come in, headquarters. This is Officer Clive... we are...

Sgt. Stedenko Use the codename! The codename!

Clyde - Narc Headquarters, headquarters come in, please. This is Codename Hardhead.

Sgt. Stedenko Hat! Hardhat! Give me that! Hello, radio dispatch? This is Codename Hardhat, Codename Hardhat, do you read me? Over.

Man Stoner Was that Lardass?

Sgt. Stedenko Hardhat! Codename Hardhat! Do you read, radio dispatch?

Man Stoner Hey, I got somethin for ya, Lardass!

Sgt. Stedenko Hardhat! Hard... Hat! Do you understand?

Pedro Lardass, Lardass!

Sgt. Stedenko Hardhat! Radio dispatch, do you know who this is?

Pedro Naw, who is this is?

Sgt. Stedenko This is Sergeant Stedenko!

Pedro Oh yeah, you know who this is?

Sgt. Stedenko No!

Pedro Bye-bye, Lardass!

Up in Smoke

Miscommunication During an Arrest

Arresting Officer And what is your name, sir?

[to Man]

Pedro Whut? I told you my name, man!

Arresting Officer Sir... what's YOUR name?

[to Man]

Pedro Hey, man! The dude wants to know your name, man!

[to Man]

Pedro Uuhhh - His name is RAALLLPH, man!

Up in Smoke

Encouraging a Calm Attitude

Man Stoner HEY! MELLOW OUT, MAN!

[to Pedro, who is in the throes of panic]

Up in Smoke

Confusion Over Smoking Terminology

Pedro I been smoking since I was born, man, I can smoke anything, man. You know like I smoke that Michoacán, and Acapulco Gold, man. I even smoke that tied stick, you know?

Man Stoner Tied stick?

Pedro Yeah, you know that stuff that's tied to a stick.

Man Stoner Ohh, THAI stick.

Up in Smoke

Discussion of Marijuana Strain Composition

Pedro Man, what is in this shit, man?

Man Stoner Mostly Maui Waui, man.

Pedro Yeah?

Man Stoner But it's got some Labrador in it.

Pedro What's Labrador?

Man Stoner It's dog shit.

Pedro What?

Man Stoner Yeah, my dog ate my stash, man. I had it on the table and the little motherfucker ate it, man.

Pedro Yeah?

Man Stoner So I had to follow him around with a little baggie for three days before I got it back. Really blew the dog's mind, ya know?

Pedro You mean we're smokin dog shit, man?

Man Stoner Gets ya high, don't it?

Man Stoner I think it's even better than before, you know?

Pedro Uhhh, I wonder what Great Dane tastes like, man.

Up in Smoke Quotes