What About Bob? (1991) - Quotes

Navigating Family Dynamics with Humor

The Wiley Family: Bob (husband)

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Lily's Perspective on Family Dynamics

The Wiley Family: Lily (Leo's sister)

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A Child's Perspective on Family Dynamics

The Marvin Family: Siggy (son)

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Family Dynamics in Challenging Situations

The Marvin Family: Anna (daughter)

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Fay's Perspective on Family Dynamics

The Marvin Family: Fay (wife)

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A Unique Kind of Friendship

Taglines: Bob's a special kind of friend. The kind that drives you crazy!

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Desire for Peace and Quiet

Dr. Marvin: I want some peace, and quiet.

Bob: I'll be quiet.

Siggy: I'll be peace.

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A Grim Childhood Memory of Drowning

Siggy: I mean, my dad just dropped me in the water. He let me go with no warning. I mean, I nearly drowned. My whole life passed before my eyes.

Bob: Well you're lucky you're only 12.

Siggy: It was still grim.

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A Colorful Farewell Between Characters

Siggy: [the Marvins have told Bob to leave, and they are saying farewells] Goodbye, green-puking pissant!

Bob: Later, barf-breath douche-mouth!

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A Crisis Unfolds in the House

Dr. Marvin: You've ruined my life! You've ruined my career! You've ruined my book! You've turned a peaceful house into an insane asylum! Get out!

Anna: Daddy!

Fay: What's gotten into you?

Dr. Marvin: It was a disaster, Fay!

Fay: No, it wasn't. You were wonderful, sweetie.

Anna: You were fine, dad.

Siggy: Yeah. Why'd you need to kick Bob out of the House?

Dr. Marvin: [Opens the door, not even looking to see if Bob's still there. He is.] You think he's gone? He's not gone! That's the whole point, He's never gone!

Bob: Is this some radical new therapy?

Dr. Marvin: You see?!

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Miscommunication About a Phone Call

Bob: [to customer; Calmly; The customer hangs up; to everyone else] Hey! NO, NO! NO! I'm expecting a phone call. Thank You. Thanks a lot. Thanks everybody, I really appreciate this. Also, uh if I... lose consciousness or black out or something explodes, would you tell Dr. Marvin when he calls that I was here...

Mrs. Guttman: Dr. Leo Marvin?

Bob: Do you know him?

Mr. Guttman: Yeah. He bought our dream house. We worked a lifetime to save for a down payment.

Mrs. Guttman: And he swooped down with his bag full of money, and grabbed it out from under us. Son of a bitch.

Mr. Guttman: She never says that.

Mrs. Guttman: Stay as far away from him as possible.

Bob: Well, that'll be easy. He won't see me, that's why I'm waiting for the phone call.

Mr. Guttman: He won't see you? Well, we'll show you where he lives.

Bob: You will?

Mrs. Guttman: The son of a bitch.

Mr. Guttman: She never says that.

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Navigating Challenges with Small Steps

Bob: Baby step on the bus, baby step on the bus...

Driver: Last bus to Lake Winapinasaukee, Bob!

Bob: I know Minh, just give me a moment. Baby step to the stairs.

Driver: Would you be able to board today? We have a "baby" schedule to keep.

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Divorce and Musical Preferences Explained

Dr. Marvin: Are you married?

Bob: I'm divorced.

Dr. Marvin: Would you like to talk about that?

Bob: There are two types of people in this world: Those who like Neil Diamond, and those who don't. My ex-wife loves him.

Involuntary Profanity and Its Rarity

Bob: [[Tourette's syndrome] Have you ever hear of ]? Involuntarily shouting profanity?

Dr. Marvin: It's exceptionally rare.

Bob: Shit-eating-son-of-a-bitch... bastard, douche-bag, twat, numb-nuts, dickhead, bitch!

Dr. Marvin: Why exactly are you doing this?

Bob: If I fake it then I don't have it. You know it's the same with the cardiac arrest.

Mental Struggles and Duality of Self

Bob Wiley: [Telling another joke to the hospital staff; staff laugh] Roses are red, violets are blue; I'm a schizophrenic...and so am I.

Misinterpretation of Therapy in Humor

Bob Wiley: [Telling the hospital staff therapy jokes; The staff laugh.; The staff laugh.] So the psychiatrist has a patient. He draws a circle and says, "What do you think of when you see this?" He says "Sex." That's not the joke yet, wait a second. He draws a picture of a tree and says "What do you think of that one when you see it?" He says "Sex." All right, then he draws a picture of a car, a house: "Sex. Sex. Sex." The doctor says, "You know you're obsessed with sex." And the patient says "Well you're the one drawing all the dirty pictures.