30 quotes
Room Service Order Request
Judy Maxwell
Hi, Room Service, this is Room 1717. I would like a double-thick roast beef sandwich medium rare on rye bread with mustard on the top, mayonnaise on the bottom, and a coffee hot fudge sundae with a large bottle of diet anything. You got that? Yeah, Room 1717. Oh, and Room Service, would you put it in the hall outside the door. I mean, don’t bring it in or knock on the door because I’m just putting my little one to sleep. Thank you.
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Skepticism Towards Unpalatable Narratives
Hugh Simon
I find that story as difficult to swallow as I do this potage au gelée.
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Lost Thoughts and Forgotten Points
Dr. Howard Bannister
The point is, the point is... oh god, I've forgotten my point.
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Defending the Unbalanced Woman's Courage
Frederick Larrabee
Don't you dare strike that brave unbalanced woman!
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Judy Maxwell's Rock Preferences Explained
Judy Maxwell
...not as much as I am in the metamorphic or sedimentary rock categories. I mean I can take your igneous rocks or leave them. I relate primarily to micas, quartz, feldspar. You can keep your pyroxenes, magnetites and coarse-grained plutonics as far as I'm concerned...
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Questioning a Woman's Stability
Frederick Larrabee
Who is that dangerously unbalanced woman?
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Confusion Over a Name in Conversation
Judy Maxwell
Eunice!? This is a person named Eunice?
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Cultural Identity and Fear in Crisis
Hugh Simon
For God's sake, don't shoot me, I'm part Italian.
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Inside a Chinese Dragon
Dr. Howard Bannister
Well, there's not much to see actually, we're inside a Chinese dragon.
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Eunice Questions Ownership of Howard's Rocks
Eunice Burns
Why, those are Howard's. What on Earth are you doing with Howard Bannister's rocks?
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Curiosity Leads to Interesting Discoveries
Hugh Simon
I myself have a little announcement to make, that may be of some interest. My natural curiosity was aroused, an so I did a little research on Mr. Bankister and Miss Burns, and I think--
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Television and War Movies in Conversation
Dr. Howard Bannister
It's the television set, Eunice. There's a movie on—a war movie. They're getting dressed for the big battle.
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Frustration Over a Simple Candy Mishap
Judge Maxwell
You've made me smash my Life Savers.
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Nostalgia for Vintage Ventegums
Judy Maxwell
I love those old Ventegums.
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Croatian Saying Explained by Hugh Simon
Hugh Simon
There is an old Croatian saying, Bollixter, which goes...
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Determined to Uncover the Truth
Judge Maxwell
I will get to the bottom of this if it takes me the rest of my life, which may end at any minute!
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Identity Confusion and Individuality
Dr. Howard Bannister
...you are not Burnsy. Burnsy is Burnsy, I mean Eunice is Burnsy, I mean she isn't Burnsy. Nobody is Burnsy.
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Identity Confusion Among Alleged Colleagues
Hugh Simon
The slight mistake, Mesdames and Messieurs, is in the so-called identity of these alleged colleagues. I don't know who he is, but she is definitely not herself.
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Questioning the Concept of Propriety
Eunice Burns
Don’t you know the meaning of propriety?
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Color-coded reminders for medication management
Judge Maxwell
Do you see this yellow pill? You know what it's for? It's to remind me to take this blue pill!
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Conducting an Avalanche in E Flat
Judy Maxwell
It so happens, Mr. Simon, that Howard has had discussions with Leonard Bernstein about the possibility of conducting an avalanche ... in E flat.
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Fritz's Declaration of Identity
Fritz
There is no Hans. There is only me, Fritz.
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Request for Straight Jackets in Various Sizes
Judge Maxwell
Tell them to bring straight jacket! In assorted sizes!
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Value and Respect in Relationships
Judy Maxwell
What do you think I am, a piece of ripe fruit you can squeeze the juice out of and cast aside?
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Questioning Propriety in Personal Spaces
Judy Maxwell
Why Ms. Burns, what are you doing in Mr. Banister's bedroom? Don't you know the meaning of propriety?
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Fear of Tile Among Snakes
Fritz
Snakes, as you know, live in mortal fear of tile.
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Frustration Over Personal Belongings
Taxi Driver
I know how you feel, mister. I hate it when my igneous rocks are even touched!
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Expressions of Affection and Pursuit
Fritz
You will tell her you are smitten with her, that you had followed her all evening, and you will make passionate love to her.
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Critique of Disrespectful Behavior
Eunice Burns
Don't kick those rocks, you Philistine!
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Uninvited Guests Are Unacceptable
Frederick Larrabee
This is inexcusable. You can't come in here uninvited.
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