11 Lousy Horror Movies That Deserve a Great Remake
Hollywood has no shortage of bad horror movies. But some of these stinkers are especially frustrating because there was so much potential for them to be great. Here are 11 horror movies that really deserve a do-over.
'C.H.U.D.' (1984)
If there's a scarier place in the US than the sewers of New York, we don't wanna know about it. That's why it's disappointing that "C.H.U.D." went the campy B-movie route rather than attempting a legitimately terrifying story about sewer monsters snatching up innocent people. This should be the sort of horror movie that doesn't need to be enjoyed ironically.
'Event Horizon' (1997)
A spaceship sent to rescue another spaceship that's literally been through Hell deserves better than terrible director Paul W.S. Anderson and his gory, character-deficient take. We're honestly surprised this hasn't been remade yet.
'Urban Legend' (1998)
On paper, this slasher movie sounds great. It deals with all the urban legends and folk tales that have sprung up over the years regarding crazed serial killers and Bloody Mary rituals. It also features several horror movie icons in its cats. Unfortunately, the film lacks the self-aware spark that makes the "Scream" series such a hoot. This one is crying out for a more intelligent remake.
'Ghosts of Mars' (2001)
After a rough patch in the '90s, "Ghosts f Mars" is the horror movie that effectively ended John Carpenter's directorial career. It's a shame, as with a larger budget it's easy to imagine Carpenter working wonders with the concept of a a Martian colony being haunted by the ghosts of ancient Mars. We'd love to see Carpenter himself take another crack at it.
'Resident Evil' (2002)
The "Resident Evil" franchise is easily the most financially successful batch of video game movies. That doesn't mean the series is any good. It's high time that the franchise gets a full reboot, one that draws more from the Romero-esque zombie horror of the early games.
'Dreamcatcher' (2003)
We wish Hollywood wasn't so inconsistent when it comes to adapting Stephen King novels to film. "Dreamcatcher" easily ranks among the worst of the bunch. But given how amazing 2017's "It" remake was, it's hard not to wonder what could be done with a horror dud like this.
'Van Helsing' (2004)
This action horror movie had the right idea. Rather than take the long way toward establishing a shared universe of Universal movie monsters, just dive right in and go nuts. Unfortunately, the execution left a lot to be desired with this one. But that doesn't mean Universal couldn't do better the second time around. It's certainly preferable to revisiting the "Dark Universe."
'Silent Hill' (2006)
The original "Silent Hill" is widely regarded as one of the best video game adaptations to date, which is more an indictment of that genre than anything else. We think much more can be done with this franchise, particularly with a director willing to emphasize the series' psychological horror elements over big CGI monsters. The good news is that the nature of the Silent Hill universe makes it easy to revisit this haunted town with a new cast of characters, no overt rebooting required.
'As Above, So Below' (2014)
This found-footage horror movie really should have been a slam dunk. It's hard to imagine a more terrifying, claustrophobic setting than the Catacombs of Paris. Sadly, "As Above, So Below" really bungled that setup, and we can only hope someone else gives the premise another try.
'The Boy' (2016)
Dolls are obviously very creepy, which explains the continued popularity of the "Childs Play" series. This horror movie had a chance to tackle the haunted doll premise form a more serious angle, but it failed miserably. There's now a sequel in the works, but we think a full, ground floor reboot may be in order here.
'47 Meters Down' (2017)
We realize "Jaws" is an impossible act to follow, but is it really so hard to craft a good shark movie that isn't also fodder for wacky drinking games? "47 Meters Down" seemed like it could deliver the terrifying thrills so many of these survival horror movies lack, but it lacked the necessary bite (pun intended). Statistically, some studio will eventually have to stumble across the proper shark movie formula, right?