The "Fast and Furious" movies are extremely popular, and extremely ripe for the tough love of Honest Trailers. Screen Junkies does the franchise proud by calling out the candy asses of "Fast 8," aka "The Fate of the Furious," in a hilarious new video.

"Buckle up for all the things you come to expect from the Fast-chise – cars, not cars, family, and Vin Diesel mumble-growls, in a sequel that really overestimates how much you remember from the last three."

One thing fans may remember is that the "Fast" team didn't start out as elite special forces operatives. As the trailer puts it:

"You're carjackers! When did you turn into John Wick?!"

Maybe Keanu Reeves' character should consider a crossover?

But this movie isn't about special forces, or John Wick. It's about Dwayne Johnson and Jason Statham. The voice-over guy is a big fan of those dudes:

"Join Tyrese, Ludacris, Kurt Russell, and other characters who you refer to by their actors' names as they fade into the background of a buddy action comedy starring Jason Stratham and The Rock -- two meta-humans on opposite sides of the law, responsible for every cool scene in the movie, and struggling not to give into raw animal lust for each other.

I am so in for the spinoff!"

The rest of the trailer mocks Charlize Theron's whispery villain -- "Hey, Charlize, you're better than this" -- and the attempt to replace Paul Walker with "this dingus" (Scott Eastwood). They also note how The Rock and Vin Diesel *almost* share screen time as they "sort of cross paths in voice-overs, in the distant background, or in edits that make it seem like Vin wasn't the 'candy ass' male co-star The Rock called out on Instagram." Getting even more meta, they end the trailer with a their take on Diesel's Instagram post with Michelle Rodriguez.

Just turn off your brain and watch the trailer, it's all good:"Fast 8" is now available on 4K Ultra HD, Blu-ray, DVD, and On Demand, as of July 11. Bonus features exclusive to Blu-ray include "The Cuban Spirit," "In the Family," and "Car Culture." The DVD and Blu-ray both include "All About the Stunts," "Extended Fight Scenes," and feature commentary with director F. Gary Gray. A special extended director's cut is also available.

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The Fate of the Furious Movie Poster
The Fate of the Furious
PG-132017
Based on 45 critics

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