Memorable Quotes from Buddy Hackett
9 quotesThe Decision to Let Go
Jim Douglas
Where's the beast? You didn't cut up the Edsel!
Tennessee Steinmetz
Came over me all of a sudden. Seemed like the only decent thing to do. Believe me, Jim, it'll be happier up there.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Negotiating the Price of Paulie
Benny
How much do you want for him, Artie?
[to Artie]
Artie
A lot more than ten bucks, baby. You'd have to grift for more than a year to make his numbers.
Ivy
Okay, which one of you three is the proprietor?
[to Paulie, Artie, and Benny]
Artie
Very funny, toots. Uh... What have you there?
[to Ivy]
Ivy
Oh, this? This is... This is my easel.
Artie
Mmm-hmm.
Ivy
It's a fine one. My late husband go it for me, and I really hate to part with it, you know.
Artie
Yeah, whatever. Uh... Dead husband aside. Uh... Do you wanna pawn, or sell?
Ivy
Well...
Tween Paulie
The real question is, aren't you prepared to throw in that potholder on your head?!
[to Ivy]
Ivy
Well, that was extremely rude! Did you teach him to do that?
[to Artie]
Benny
Uh... No. No, that's the thing. The dirty mouth is all his.
[to Ivy; points at Artie]
Tween Paulie
What are you looking at?!
[to Ivy]
Ivy
You know, I think I'll take him with me.
[to Artie]
Benny
Well, I don't think so, lady. You see, I saw the bird first.
[to Ivy]
Ivy
Oh, no, no, no. I'm... I'm afraid you are not the right owner for him. Uh... You know, somebody has got to teach this beautiful bird some manners. Then it might as well be me.
[as Artie and Benny look at each other]
Tween Paulie
But, what's wrong with my manners?! BUUUUURRRRRPPPPP!
[belches]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Reflections on a Challenging Journey
Misha
So, they bring you here?
[to Paulie about Marie, Warren, and Lila]
Adult Paulie
No, no. It wasn't that easy hitting Rock Bottom. I did a bunch of things. First, I did a stint as a window display in a place called, Bloomingdale's. And I was in a brochure for Costa Rica. I did some work as a magician's assistant doing children's parties.
Narrator
But, when Zintar fell on hard times, he had to choose between me and the cape. Guess which one he pawned.
Tween Paulie
What's new, Pussycat? Woah, woah, woah, woah, woah. What's new, Pussycat? Woah, woah, woah, woah, woah.
[singing]
Artie
Shut up, you goddamn flying rat! Shut up!
[to Paulie]
Tween Paulie
Pussycat, pussycat, you are delicious. And if my wishes could only come true...
[singing]
Artie
Maybe you are uncomfortable in there. Maybe you need a change. How about this... uh... nice toaster oven for little old Top Brown only, huh?
[to Paulie]
Tween Paulie
Oh, come on, Artie. We haven't pawned anything all day. Look, let's go catch the Number Nine at Belmont. I'm bored.
Artie
You and me both.
Tween Paulie
I wanna go home.
Artie
Yeah, well, get on the line.
[a side burned Benny, a New Jersey-accented thief, enters the pawnshop with a stolen radio]
Benny
You know, Artie, today is your lucky day.
[to Artie]
Artie
Right. Fresh out of the showroom, right? Where's the receipt?
[inspects the stolen radio]
Benny
I lost it.
Artie
Ten bucks.
Benny
Ten bucks?! Come on, gimme a break, Artie! I'm trying to upgrade the level of your merchandise here!
Tween Paulie
Hit the brakes, ugly!
[to Benny]
Benny
Aw, that's cute. Are you training your bird to insult your customers?
[to Artie]
Tween Paulie
No, but I could tell you're ugly all by myself.
[to Benny]
Benny
How'd he do that?
[to Artie]
Artie
He watches television.
Benny
What an angle. I could see how his unique skills could really come in handy to an intelligent guy, huh?!
[to Paulie]
Tween Paulie
Well, I'll let you know when I'll see one.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
The Love Bug - Dialogue 8
Mr. Thorndyke
What part of Ireland did you say your mother came from?
Tennessee Steinmetz
Coney, Island.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Unexpected Encounter Between Two Characters
Mr. Thorndyke
Good evening.
Tennessee Steinmetz
Sorry, the other rats are out for the evening!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Pizza Metaphor in The Love Bug
Tennessee Steinmetz
Thorndyke again. He made a pizza outta it!
[seeing a sabotaged spare wheel]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Unusual Food Choices Spark Conversation
Jim Douglas
Why is it the only food we have in this house is parrot food? I mean, we don't *have* a parrot.
Tennessee Steinmetz
Eat that! That's good! That's pressed kelp. That aerates your liver.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Celebrating Irish Heritage and Pride
Tennessee Steinmetz
Up the Irish!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Friendship and Loyalty in The Love Bug
Tennessee Steinmetz
I'm your friend.
[to Herbie, sotto voce]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.