Memorable Quotes from Cameron Richardson
3 quotesIan's Unlikely Offer to the Chipmunks
Ian
Hey, if you guys behave, maybe I'll let you call me "Uncle Ian" again. Deal?
[In his car, believing he still has the Chipmunks]
Alvin doll
Hola, me llamo Alvin, y yo quiero una Hula-Hoop. (Translation: Hi, I'm Alvin, and I want a hula-hoop.)
Ian
¡Madre de Dios! (Translation: Mother of God.) NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
[looks to the carrier, realizes the Chipmunks are gone]
Dave
Claire.
Claire
Hey.
Dave
Come on in!
Alvin
Well, hel-lo, Clarina!
[leaning on a bottle of champagne, wearing his "A" cap]
Claire
Hi, guys.
[to the chipmunks]
Dave
I hope you like toaster waffles.
Alvin
And, for US classy chipmunks, a BIT of the bubbly.
Claire
Oohhh!
[surprised]
Alvin
Stupid...cork...DOESN'T-- Whoa! Yikes! Oops.
[while struggling to uncork a bottle; the cork comes loose and goes flying...; ...then the cork smashes into the glass on a China cabinet; giggles nervously]
Dave
Not gonna say it.
[after a short pause, calmly]
Alvin
Uh-oh!
Simon
Good grief.
Claire
Are you still not gonna say it?
Dave
Nope!
[smiles]
Dave
I'm gonna say it. ALVIN!!!!!!
[shocked, before the scene fades to black]
Alvin
OKAY!
[last line, offscreen]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Consequences of Mischief in a Presentation
David Seville
Uh, guys? What's this about?
[shows his presentation board]
Simon
Obviously, Theodore's butt.
Theodore
W-We told you we colored.
David Seville
On my presentation boards?! You got me fired!
Theodore
Oh. We didn't know. We're sorry, Dave.
[David turns off the TV]
David Seville
Oh, you're sorry? That's fantastic! "Sorry" doesn't get my job back, now, does it, Theodore? Why are my clothes all over the place?
[sees his clothes laid on kitchen floor]
Simon
We used them to mop up the water. Good idea, right?
David Seville
Oh, my God, Theodore, did you just...?
Theodore
Um... um...
Simon
It's a raisin, Dave.
David Seville
Prove it.
Simon
Mmm-hmm!
David Seville
Okay, you got me. Look, I wanna talk to all of you guys. Where's Alvin? Alvin?
[Simon spits out the poop that looks like a raisin]
Simon
You owe me big-time.
[to Theodore, sternly]
David Seville
Alvin!!!
Alvin
There's this new thing. It's called knocking'!
David Seville
Get out!
Alvin
I'm waiting for the rinse cycle!
David Seville
Out!
Alvin
Whoa, whoa, I'm taking a shower here!
David Seville
You know, if I made a list of my worst days ever, guess what? Today would be at the top of the list!
Alvin
And it's still early!
David Seville
Clam it, sudsy! Okay, guys, let me just put it to you like this, okay? I have no job, no career, my house is always a mess, thank you very much...
[sighs]
Claire
Hi, Dave. It's Claire Wilson. And why did I just say my last name? That was weird. I guess I'm just a little nervous about coming over for dinner.
[Answering Machine Beeps]
David Seville
Dinner!
Claire
So, yeah. I'm gonna hang up now. I'll be there at 7. Okay. Bye.
David Seville
That's half an hour!
Theodore
Who's Claire?
Simon
Claire is Dave's mate. Ooh-la-la.
David Seville
She is not my mate. She's my ex-mate. Okay, this is great.
Simon
Dave. Dave, relax. You just go get the food. We'll take care of the rest. All right?
David Seville
No, why am I having a hard time believing you?
Alvin
That hurts, Dave. That really hurts.
Simon
Yeah, we're all in this together, Dave.
Theodore
Like a family.
David Seville
No, not like a family.
Alvin
Tick-tock, Dave. Better bust a move.
David Seville
Right.
[Alvin chuckles]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Plea for Honesty Among Friends
David Seville
Well, this is going to sound really strange.
Claire
No games, no fooling around.
David Seville
The truth?
Claire
Please I'm begging you.
David Seville
... My life is being sabotaged by talking chipmunks.
Claire
You know what?
[In disbelief; leaves]
David Seville
I'm not crazy, I swear.
Claire
You haven't changed at all.
David Seville
Wait Claire don't go, I- I can explain... Chipmunks.
[closes door, goes to his room]
Alvin
You should have kissed her, Dave! She wanted you!
[knocking on door, offscreen]
Simon
Alvin, you're not helping.
[offscreen]
Alvin
Aw, don't give up, Dave.
[offscreen]
David Seville
Go away! Leave me alone.
Theodore
Dave, would you like a cookie?
[offscreen]
Alvin
Is it me, or was he a little mad?
Simon
Oh. Hmm. Hmm. I wonder. Is Dave mad? Yes!
Theodore
He really did have garlic breath.
Simon
Yeah, well-played, guys.
Alvin
Idea! Ding-ding-ding-ding! Who has cab fare?
David Seville
Dear fellas. I'm sorry, but this isn't really working out. I don't know what made me think I can handle you guys when I can barely manage my own life. You should go back to your real home in the forest. It's what's best for all of us. I'm sorry it has to be this way. But-- Guys? Simon, Theodore? Guys? Alvin. Alvin!
[Makes a box with waffles and punches holes in the top, presumably to put the chipmunks in. He writes an attempt letter; crumbles the paper and throws it on the floor. He notices the Chipmunks are missing and looks for them outside his house]
Ian
Hello?...Hello? Kids.
[glances outside his mansion; the Chipmunsk sneak into Ian's mansion; Ian sees no one's here; closes the door and heads back to the stairs, but is startled by the Chimpunks' singing]
Chipmunks
♪Christmas, Christmas time is here / Time for toys and time for cheer / We can hardly stand the wait / Please Christmas, don't be late!♪
[a capella as they appear in front of Ian]
Ian
Welcome to Jett Records.
[amazed with a smile]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.