Memorable Quotes from Gregory Smith
8 quotesNegotiation Turns Hostile in Small Soldiers Scene
Phil Fimple
Hi! I'm Phil Fimple. I'm here to negotiate the surrender of the, uh... ]. Now here's our proposal: take them!
[[w:Gorgonzola|Gorgonzolas]
Insaniac
Hey! He's selling us down the river! The guy's a regular ]
[listening from inside; [w:Benedict Arnold|Arnold Benedict!]
Phil Fimple
I mean, switch em off, take em apart, steal their batteries, whatever it is you... people do. Hey... is that my JVC?!
[notices speakers covered by a net]
Chip Hazard
There will be no surrender! There will be no mercy! All Gorgonite scum must die!
Link Static
Yeah! Bomb em all the way back to preschool!
Chip Hazard
Recon estimates Gorgonite scum strength at 16!
Christy Fimple
Sixteen? Where'd they get sixteen from?
Larry Benson
Seven Gorgonites and nine people.
Phil Fimple
Well, you heard our proposal...
[nervously]
Stuart Abernathy
Phil, get in here! Hurry!
[opening the door]
Chip Hazard
These negotiations are over!
Chip Hazard
We are the Commando Elite! Everything else... is just a toy!
Alan Abernathy
What are they doing?
Irene Abernathy
Psychological warfare.
Christy Fimple
The Marines did this against ].
[[w:Manuel Noriega|Noriega]
Marion Fimple
Phil? Phil!
Phil Fimple
What?
Marion Fimple
I love this song!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Toy Conflict and Customer Service Disappointment
Alan Abernathy
The Commando Elite wrecked my dad's store and destroyed the Gorgonites!
[on the phone to Globotech]
GloboTech Telephone Operator
The Commando Elite are designed to fight the Gorgonites.
Alan Abernathy
They didn't fight them, they destroyed them, and now they're gone!
GloboTech Telephone Operator
I'm sorry, but Heartland Play Systems does not replace lost toys.
Alan Abernathy
I didn't lose them! Look, is there a machine I can talk to? Just transfer me to a machine!
GloboTech Telephone Operator
Bye. Have a nice day, ma'am.
Alan Abernathy
I'm not a "ma'am"!
[aghast]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Moment of Panic and Communication
Harriet
Sport, Sport..... SPORT!
Harriet
Help me.
Sport
(Walks to the window) Hey, Harriet.
Harriet
(Panicks) Hey.
Sport
Okay, come in.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
The Value of Money and Perspective
Harriet
I hate money.
Sport
You'd like it a lot more if you didn't have any.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Debate on Reality of Living Toys
Phil Fimple
Is this entire household insane?! He says that toy is alive just because it can move a little? What's next, the ] drops by with a ]
[pointing at Archer; [w:Fairy with Turquoise Hair|Blue Fairy; [w:Talking Cricket|talking cricket?!]
Christy Fimple
Dad, he's telling the truth!
Phil Fimple
He's brainwashed you, hasn't he? Don't worry, honey. We'll get you the best deprogrammer money can buy.
Slamfist
You can't change programming.
[listening in from a shelf]
Marion Fimple
Look! Another one...
[still intoxicated]
Alan Abernathy
See? I told you they were hiding. It's what they do.
Phil Fimple
That's it. Come on, Christy. Timmy, Marion, we're out of here.
Stuart Abernathy
Hey, don't be a stranger, Phil.
Irwin Wayfair
Hi. Uh, yes, we're with Heartland Play Systems, Consumer Satisfaction. Is there an Alan Abernathy here?
Timmy Fimple
That's Alan, right there.
[points at Alan]
Larry Benson
How you doing? We understand you acquired some of our fine products.
Irwin Wayfair
There's a chance they might be... defective.
Larry Benson
But there's no reason to think they could do any harm.
Stuart Abernathy
Oh, there's reasons!
Alan Abernathy
There is a problem with the Commandos.
Larry Benson
Really? What kind of problem? Bear in mind, you will be called into court to support your claim.
Stuart Abernathy
YOUR TOYS NEARLY KILLED MY SON!
Irene Abernathy
Stuart--
Stuart Abernathy
Don't say "calm down"! Calm was killing me. And you! You owe my son an apology!
[to Phil]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Dolls Engage in Lighthearted Conversation
Alan Abernathy
Are you all right?
Gwendy Doll 1
All my make-up is cruelty-free!
Gwendy Doll 2
You come here often?
Gwendy Doll 3
Will you take me to the prom?
Gwendy Doll 4
If you can't accessorize, pulverize!
[wielding blades]
Gwendy Doll 5
You've been a bad boy! And now you must be punished!
Gwendy Doll 6
Watch out, girls! Hissy fit!
Gwendy Doll 5
You're to die for!
[still threatening Alan]
Gwendy Doll 7
Run! She's got a baton!
Gwendy Doll 8
It's a ]
[[w:Bataan Death March|Baton Death March!]
Gwendy Doll 9
She's gone postal!
Gwendy Doll 10
Oh, I broke a nail...
Christy Fimple
I ALWAYS HATED THESE THINGS!
Gwendy Doll 11
Oh, the humanity!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Fairness in Leadership Opportunities
Miss Elson
Good morning. Today we're... Yes, Harriet?
[to the class; pauses and sees Harriet's hand raised]
Harriet
Miss Elson, I've been thinking a lot, and you know how class president automatically gets to be editor of the sixth grade newspaper?
Miss Elson
Yes.
Harriet
Well... I think... I think it's too much for one person and it's not fair to everybody because everybody deserves a chance, and we should change it.
Marion
OBJECTION!
[shouting loudly]
Miss Elson
This isn't a courtroom, Marion. I like that idea, Harriet. Let's see what the class thinks.
[as Harriet sits back down in her seat]
Marion
Miss Elson, I think I speak for everybody when I say this is... this is a really, really, stupid idea!
[gets up from her desk]
Miss Elson
That is one opinion. But let's take a vote. Marion is now editor of The Guidepost, would anyone like to nominate another candidate?
Miss Elson
Well... I guess if no one has anything to say...
Boy with Purple Socks
I have something to say: I think that Harriet is a very good writer, and if we only listen to one person's opinion, we may never get anywhere new. But Harriet might have something very original, and I'd like to read what she has to write.
[gets up from his desk and finally speaks in front of the entire class, much to everybody's surprise]
Miss Elson
Is there a second?
Sport
I second it.
[raises his hand]
Janie Gibbs
I third it.
[raises her hand]
Miss Elson
Okay, then. Harriet Welsch is now a candidate for editor. Who votes for Harriet?
Miss Elson
And that... is that.
Harriet
Yes!
[whispers]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Celebration of Unexpected Success
Sport's Dad
Will you take a look at this. Huh? Huh? What do you think of your old man now, Sport? Ten thousand smackaroos! No more paying with change. No more, no more spaghetti. Going to feel like steak. And you know those fancy basketball sneakers with the, with the buckles and the Velcro and the crap all over them? Their yours, buddy boy, all yours! Hello? Murray. Hey, hey I take it all back. All agents aren't useless. Oh, I'm kidding you, I'm kidding you, man. You know I was always in your corner. Oh, yeah, I knew you'd come through. Well, Sport and I are going to do a little celebrating today...
[overly ecstatic; his phone rings, he answers it]
Harriet
Hey.
Sport
Hey.
Harriet
Sold his book?
Sport
Got a real job.
Sport's Dad
Hey, Harriet, you hear the good news?
[notices Harriet]
Harriet
You're a writer. So how's it feel?
[smiling]
Sport's Dad
Oh, big slice off heaven, side order of fries. Say, you hungry? I feel like going to the fanciest, schmaniest restaurant in town. We'll abuse the waiter. Who's with me? Harriet?
Sport
She can't come.
Sport's Dad
What do you mean she can't come? You haven't even asked her.
Sport
I said she can't come. You can't be my friend if you're not my friend.
[firmly; to Harriet; he closes the door on Harriet]
Harriet
I'm sorry, Sport. I'm sorry.
[from the other side of the door, crying]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.