Memorable Quotes from Jeff Gillen
2 quotesUnexpected Response to Santa's Gift Suggestion
Santa Claus
How about a nice, uh... football?
Ralphie
Football? What's a football? Without conscious will my voice squeaked out "football".
[As narrator]
Santa Claus
Okay, get him out of here.
Ralphie
A football!? Oh, no! What was I doing!? Wake up, stupid! Wake up!
[As narrator]
Ralphie
NO! No, no; I want an official Red Ryder carbine action 200-shot-range model air rifle!
[As child; climbs back up exit slide; smiles hopefully at Santa]
Santa Claus
You'll shoot your eye out, kid. Merry Christmas. Ho. Ho. Ho.
Ralphie
NOOOOOO!!
[smile fades to shock as Santa pushes Ralphie down the exit slide]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
The Consequences of a Holiday Wish
Ralphie
Ok, Black Bart now you get yours!
Ralphie (as an adult)
Oh, my God! I shot my eye out!
[narrating]
Santa Claus
You'll shoot your eye out, kid.
[in Ralphie's head]
Mrs. Parker and Miss Shields
You'll shoot your eye out! You'll shoot your eye out!
[in Ralphie's head with a sing-song]
Santa Claus
Ho ho ho!
[in Ralphie's head; at the same time]
Mrs. Parker
Ralphie, you be careful out there! Don't shoot your eye out!
[from the kitchen while she's working on the turkey]
Ralphie (as an adult)
She hadn't seen! She didn't know! My eye's all right. The BB must've hit my glasses. My glasses! Oh, no! Where are my glasses?! Few things brought such swift and terrible retribution on a kid as a pair of busted glasses.
[narrating; Removes his fingers and just sees blood.]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.