Memorable Quotes from Karan Soni
4 quotesUnexpected News About Significant Others at Party
Tim
Nate, what's up, man? Did you see? Significant others are welcome at the party.
Drew
Look at that. Looks like we're finally gonna meet Becca.
Nate
Yeah. Um, oh, shoot. Uh, except she's working late tonight. Modelling.
Tim
Is she shooting the cover... of "Full of Shit" magazine?
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Dopinder's Ambition for a Dark Career
Dopinder
I want to become a contract killer.
Deadpool
I'm sorry, what did you say?
Dopinder
Remember when I kidnapped Bandhu and threatened him with great violence?
Deadpool
Err, you kind of killed him.
Dopinder
And then remember the movie ]?
[[w:Interview with the Vampire (film)|Interview with the Vampire]
Deadpool
Don't want to.
Dopinder
When ] fed 10-year-old ] blood for the first time, and she looked up at his smooth, handsome face and said "I want some more..." Oh, Pool, picture me, a 10-year-old Kirsten Dunst!
[[w:Tom Cruise|Tom Cruise; [w:Kirsten Dunst|Kirsten Dunst]
Deadpool
...I'll never not picture that. But I can't wait to never speak of this, as soon as possible. We're here.
Deadpool
Dopinder? It's me again. Look, a saner man might discourage you from joining the deadly merc business, what with your concave chest and your paper towel tube arms. But you're an eagle, and goddammit, an eagle's gotta soar! You gotta grab those dreams, grab those dreams by the dick-tip and make it rain!
Dopinder
I don't know what that means.
Deadpool
Me neither!
Deadpool
I'm gonna see you — Boop! — at the office. In the sky.
[taps his nose; under his breath, as he leaves]
Dopinder
You're my Tom Cruise!
Deadpool
And you're my Kristen Dunst! "Kristen"? "Kirsten"?
[to himself]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Deserving Kindness Amidst Chaos
Nate
Allison, are you okay?
Allison
No! I'm not okay. My ex-husband is dating a stripper, Drew is cyberstalking me, and Fred from accounting is like a human fucking AMBER Alert. Don't I deserve to date someone who is nice?
Nate
Of course you do. Allison, you're an amazing person. You basically take care of this whole office. And you do it every day, even though most people don't seem to notice. So, yeah, you deserve someone nice.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Boss Asks Employees for Unconventional Help
Nate
Okay, I'm gonna need both of you assclowns to hack into Clay's phone so we can find him.
Tim
Come on, why would we help you, dude? Seriously?
Drew
Yeah, why would we help you?
Nate
Because I'm your fucking boss, and I'm telling you to.
[grabs Tim by the collar]
Drew
He can't touch him!
[turns to Mary]
Mary
I'll allow it.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.