Kathy Bates Quotes

Regina Jackson What is your purpose in coming here?

Klaatu There is a gathering of world leaders not far from here. I will explain my purpose to them.

Regina Jackson I am afraid that is not possible. Perhaps you should explain yourself to me instead.

Klaatu Do you speak for the entire human race?

Regina Jackson I speak for the President of the United States. Now please, tell me why have you come to our planet.

Klaatu Your planet?

Regina Jackson Yes. This is our planet.

Klaatu No, it is NOT.

Susan I need happy. I need romantic. I need love, and I need it from you.

Kelvin Moore You need Jesus.

Susan Go. Go away now.

Annie Wilkes You— You dirty bird, how could you?

Paul Sheldon What?

Annie She can't be dead! Misery Chastain cannot be dead!

Paul Annie, in 1871 women often died during childbirth. But her spirit is the important thing, and Misery's spirit is still alive.

Annie I didn't want her spirit! I want her, and you murdered her!

Paul No I didn't.

Annie Who did?

Paul No one, she— she died. She just slipped away.

Annie Slipped away? Slipped away? She didn't just slip away! You did it! You did it! You did it! You did it! You did it! You murdered my Misery!

Paul Annie! Annie!

Annie I thought you were good, Paul, but you're not good, you're just a lying ol dirty birdy. And I don't think I better be around you for a while. And don't even think about anybody coming for you. Not the doctors. Not your agent. Not your family, because I never called them. Nobody knows you're here. And you better hope nothing happens to me, because if I die, you die.

Annie Wilkes I know I'm only 40 pages into your book, but...

Paul Sheldon But what?

Annie Nothing.

Paul No, what is it?

Annie Well, it's ridiculous! Who am I to make a criticism to someone like you?

Paul It's all right. I can take it.

Annie Well, it's brilliantly written, but then, everything you write is brilliant.

Paul Any rough stuff?

Annie The swearing, Paul. There, I said it.

Paul The, uh, profanity bothers you?

Annie It has no nobility.

Paul These are slum kids, I was a slum kid. Everybody talks like that.

Annie They do not! What do you think I say when I go to the feedstore in town? "Oh, now Wally, give me a bag of that F-in pig feed, and ten pounds of that bitchly cow corn"? And at the bank, do I tell Mrs. Bollinger, "Oh, here's one big bastard of a check, give me some of your Christ-ing money?" There! Look there! See what you made me do? I'm sorry.

Libby Holden I am a gay lesbian woman — I do not mythologize the male sexual organ. I know you did it. It wasn't enough sticking with the crap Jack actually did — you had to get creative! Well, mister, you're about to become missus!

Annie Wilkes I'M GONNA KILL YOU, YOU LYING COCKSUCKER!

Regina Jackson History has lessons to teach us about first encounters between civilizations. As a rule the less advanced civilization is either exterminated or enslaved. I'm thinking of Pizarro and the Incans, Columbus and the Native Americans, and the list goes on. Unfortunately in this case, the less advanced civilization is us.

Michael Granier This is the representative of an extra-terrestrial civilization. This is the most important discovery in the history of Mankind!

Regina Jackson It may well be the last discovery in the history of Mankind.

Libby Holden He's poked his pecker in some sorry trash bins.

Annie Wilkes Here's your pills.

Paul Sheldon Annie? Annie, what is it?

Annie The rain. Sometimes it gives me the blues. When you first came here, I only loved the writer part of Paul Sheldon. Now I know I love the rest of him, too. I know you don't love me. Don't say you do. You're beautiful, brilliant, a famous man of the world and I'm not a movie star type. You'll never know the fear of losing someone like you if you're someone like me.

Paul Why would you lose me?

Annie Book's almost finished. Your legs are getting better. Soon you'll be wanting to leave.

Paul Why would I leave? I like it here.

Annie That's very kind of you, but I'll bet it's not all together true. I have this gun. Sometimes I think about using it. I'd better go now. I might put bullets in it.

Libby Holden From now on you can call me the Dust Buster — I'm stronger than dirt!

Annie Wilkes I am your number one fan. There is nothing to worry about. You are going to be just fine. I am your number one fan.

Larry Hertzel All I was doing was welcoming somebody into the family.

Roberta Hertzel Larry, we've been welcomed by you, thank you so much, now would you please just drink your fucking milk and shut the fuck up.

Roberta Hertzel People used to think it was strange cause I breast-fed him til he was almost five, but I say - hunh, just look at the results!

Gertrude Stein The artist's job is not to succumb to despair but to find an antidote for the emptiness of existence.

Annie Wilkes Anyway, my favorite was Rocketman, and once it was a no-breaks chapter. The bad guy stuck him in a car on a mountain road and knocked him out and welded the door shut and tore out the brakes and started him to his death, and he woke up and tried to steer and tried to get out but the car went off a cliff before he could escape! And it crashed and burned and I was so upset and excited, and the next week, you better believe I was first in line. And they always start with the end of the last week. And there was Rocketman, trying to get out, and here comes the cliff, and just before the car went off the cliff, he jumped free! And all the kids cheered, but I didn't cheer. I stood right up and started shouting, "This isn't what happened last week! Have you all got amnesia? They just cheated us! This isn't fair! He didn't get out of the cock-a-doodie car!