K

Keith Coogan Quotes

Actor

Memorable Quotes from Keith Coogan

7 quotes
Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead
Thermostat Tensions Between Siblings
Sue Ellen Did you turn the air conditioner on?
Kenny Yeah, well I was hot.
Sue Ellen Look I'm stuck with the bills, I would like to keep that thermostat at seventy-six, okay?
Kenny Wow, you take these things so personally.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead
Misunderstandings About a Babysitter's Condition
Zach We told you to talk to her. We didn't want you to send her to the glue factory.
Sue Ellen I didn't kill her, Zach. She died in her sleep.
Melissa Probably choked on her whistle.
Walter She doesn't look dead.
Zach That's cause it just happened. So, you can't really tell, like on ].
[[w: MacGyver (1985 TV series)|MacGyver]
Kenny Um... what should we do with her body?
Sue Ellen Call an ambulance, call the cops, I don't know. Well, I mean they're gonna come and get her and they're gonna ask us a lotta questions...
Kenny They'll probably blame us.
Sue Ellen They'll definitely call Mom.
Melissa SHE'LL blame us.
Kenny Yeah, she'll hop the next flight home and then she'll be in our faces.
Sue Ellen I don't want Mom to come home.
Zach I don't either.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead
Miscommunication Among Siblings About the Kids
Sue Ellen Where are the kids?
[asking about her brothers and sister]
Kenny Zach's at Cynthia's, Melissa's upstairs, and Walter's asleep. ] into the oven and shuts the door]
[Throws the can of [[w:Reckitt|Easy-Off]
Sue Ellen What's wrong with you?
Kenny Nothing is wrong with me.
[pulls the gloves off and throws them on the counter]
Sue Ellen Did you burn something?
[opens the fridge and takes out a can of [[w:Diet Coke|Diet Coke]
Kenny Yeah, well, maybe if you'd called and told me you were gonna be, like... three-and-a-half hours late, I could've planned my dinner better.
[annoyed]
Sue Ellen I had to work late, OK?
Kenny You still shoulda called. I sat and I waited. I went ahead and I fed the kids. I worked all day on that casserole.
Sue Ellen Sorry.
Kenny You haven't even said how nice the house looks. You're off at the office all day doing interesting office things. I'm stuck here. Cooking and cleaning and mowing, helping Melissa with her fastball, being a role model for Zach, spending quality time with Walter, doin your party shit! You've got the car and you don't even take me anywhere anymore. And when was the last time we went out to dinner together, huh? Y'know what? I'm sick and tired of not bein appreciated.
Sue Ellen I appreciate you.
Kenny Eat shit!
[storms into the living room and starts whisking the couch]
Sue Ellen I don't believe this! I get to get up at 5:30 every morning so I can beat rush hour traffic and go sit behind a desk for eight hours and miss ] every day on my summer vacation. And then, I get to drive home in gridlock in a VOLVO with no air conditioning just so I can take care of you guys and put food on the damn table! It's a rat race and it sucks, Kenny. So what do you want, a medal?... Oh come on, you don't have to do all this. I mean, I never asked you to whisk the couch.
[[w:The Oprah Winfrey Show|Oprah Winfrey]
Kenny Well, it needed it.
[stopping, wistfully]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead
A Farewell to Mom's Extended Absence
Friend Isn't your mom like leaving for months?
Kenny Oh, you're right. BYE MOM, HAVE A BLAST!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead
Measuring for Uncertainty in New Experiences
Kenny Sure she's gonna fit?
Sue Ellen How should I know? I've never done this before.
Kenny Well, neither have I.
Zach I think we should measure her first.
Melissa Let's hack off her head!
Walter Yeah!
[in agreement with Melissa]
Sue Ellen Uh, alright, go get that, uh, metal tape measure thing out of the garage.
Kenny Would you stop ordering us around, you're not the babysitter.
Sue Ellen That's right Kenny, the babysitter is dead. Now just do it.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead
A Witty Exchange on Intelligence
Sue Ellen Kenny, why don't you save your last three brain cells, you might need them.
Kenny I won't!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead
Summer Struggles and Unconventional Solutions
Kenny This place is a crock. We're never gonna make it through the summer. Man, I'm gonna hole up at Lizard's.
Sue Ellen Oh, that's real brotherly of you, Kenny. Always taking the easy way out. Don't you have any pride?
Kenny No.
Melissa I got an idea. When our food runs out, we can eat Elvis.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.