Memorable Quotes from Mackenzie Crook
4 quotesCasting Rejection in the Entertainment Industry
TV executive
Courtney Love?
Producer
Drugged-out hag.
TV executive
Faye Dunaway?
Producer
Don't call us, we'll call you.
TV executive
Sharon Stone?
Producer
Hag.
TV executive
Geena Davis?
Producer
Hag.
TV executive
Sigourney Weaver?
Producer
Hag.
TV executive
Kim Basinger?
Producer
Hag.
TV executive
Emma Thompson?
Producer
Brit hag.
TV executive
Susan Sarandon?
Producer
Red state-alienating hag.
TV executive
Meg Ryan?
Producer
Too much plastic surgery.
TV executive
Melanie Griffith?
Producer
Way too much plastic surgery.
TV executive
Patricia Heaton?
Producer
Pointless plastic surgery.
TV executive
Cher?
Producer
Insurmountable amount of plastic surgery.
Rosie
Listen, you little bird of a ]! Where do you come off insulting these women? How many hit songs did you sing? How many Oscars do you have? Could you look cute next to Warren Beatty? Or live with Don Johnson? Or act with Ted Danson? You're not worthy of kissing Cher's tattooed ass!
[angrily; [man]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Misunderstandings Amongst Pirates Over Identity
Bo'sun
You two! You brought us the wrong person!
[to Pintel and Ragetti]
Pintel
No! She had the medallion. She was the proper age!
Ragetti
She said her name was Turner. You heard her. I think she lied to us
Twigg
You brought us here for nothing!
Barbossa
I won't take questions or second guesses, not from the likes of you, Master Twigg.
Koehler
Who's to blame? Every decision you've made has led us from bad to worse!
Mallot
It was you who sent Bootstrap to the depths!
Bo'sun
And it's you who brought us here in the first place!
[the cursed crew draw out their weapons and turn them on Barbossa]
Barbossa
If any coward here dare challenge me, let him speak! Hmm?
[drawing his own sword]
Koehler
I say we cut her throat and spill all her blood! Just in case.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Unexpected Misunderstanding Between Friends
Bunst
I... I do believe I've soiled myself.
Hidlick
Oh, good... I thought it was me.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Commanding the Ship's Crew
Hector Barbossa
Trim that sail!
Jack Sparrow
Trim that sail!
Hector Barbossa
Slack windward brace!
Jack Sparrow
Slack windward brace!
Hector Barbossa
Haul the pennant line!
Jack Sparrow
Haul the pennant line!
Hector Barbossa
What are you doin'?
Jack Sparrow
What are you doin'?
Hector Barbossa
No, what are you doin'?
Jack Sparrow
What are you doin'?
Hector Barbossa
No! What ARRR-ee you doin'?
Jack Sparrow
What are you doin'? Captain gives orders on the ship.
Hector Barbossa
The captain of the ship is givin orders.
Jack Sparrow
My ship, makes me captain.
Hector Barbossa
They be my charts!
Jack Sparrow
Well, that makes you...chart man.
Pintel
STOW IT! THE BOTH OF YOU! THAT'S AN ORDER, UNDERSTAND?!?! Sorry. I just thought, with the Captain issue in doubt, I'd throw my name in for consideration, sorry.
[yelling fiercely; everyone. including Jack and Barbossa, stop what they're doing and stare at him; sheepishly]
Ragetti
I'd vote for you.
[to Pintel]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.