Memorable Quotes from Roberto Benigni
24 quotesThe Essence of Being a Good Egg
Roberto
I am-a no criminal. I am a good egg.
Jack
I am a good egg, Jesus.
Roberto
Yes. Yeah, I'm a good egg. Yes. We are! We are a good egg. My friends.
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The Humor of Exclusionary Signs
Guido
Oh, that. "Not Allowed" signs are the latest trend! The other day, I was in a shop with my Chinese friend and his pet kangaroo, but their sign said, "No Chinese or Kangaroos Allowed," and I said to my friend, "Well, what can I do? They don't allow kangaroos.
Giosué
We let everyone in our shop, don't we?
Guido
Well, tomorrow, we'll put one up. We won't let in anything we don't like. What don't you like?
Giosué
Spiders.
Guido
Good I don't like Visigoths. Tomorrow, we'll get a sign: "No Spiders or Visigoths Allowed.
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A Lighthearted Exchange About Prizes
Guido
The prize is... the prize is...
Eliseo
A tank.
Guido
Yes! Yes, the prize is a tank.
Joshua
I already have one.
Guido
No, a real one.
Joshua
A real tank?
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Language Barrier in a Difficult Situation
Bartolomeo
They are looking for someone who speaks German, to translate their instructions.
Guido
(raises his hand)
Bartolomeo
Do you speak German?
Guido
No.
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A Reflection on a Sad, Beautiful World
Roberto
Is a sad and beautiful world.
Zack
Yeah, it's a sad and beautiful world... that's a good one. Yeah, yeah... buzz off.
Roberto
Ah, thank you, Buzz off to you too.
Zack
No... buzz off!
Roberto
Ah, "buzz off". b-u-z-z o-f-f... Buzz off... Is, uh, "is a sad and beautiful world", "Good evening. Buzz off to everybody" "Oh, thank you, buzz off to you too." Oh, it's a pleasure. Thank you.
[writing]
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Misunderstandings About Reality and Innocence
Joshua
They turn us into buttons and soap.
Guido
Who told you that?
Joshua
An old man was crying. He said they turn us into buttons and soap.
Guido
You fell for that? Again? I thought you were a sharp boy – cunning, intelligent. Buttons and soap out of people? That’ll be the day!
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Understanding the Game's Rules
Guido
Did you play with the other kids?
Joshua
Yes, but they don’t know the rules. They said it isn’t true that the first prize is a tank. They don’t know anything about points.
Guido
Did you fall for that? They’re as sly as foxes. They want to beat you. Are you joking? There’s no tank? Don’t you believe them!
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Request for a Key from Above
Guido
Mary! Send down the key! (speaking to the woman in the window)
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The Game of Survival
Guido
(pretending to translate a German concentration camp guard's instructions to the new prisoners) The game starts now. You have to score one thousand points. If you do that, you take home a tank with a big gun. Each day we will announce the scores from that loudspeaker. The one who has the fewest points will have to wear a sign that says "Jackass" on his back. There are three ways to lose points. One, turning into a big crybaby. Two, telling us you want to see your mommy. Three, saying you're hungry and want something to eat.
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Reflections on a Unique Maternal Relationship
Roberto
Very strange mother, my mother.
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The Weight of a Deadly Gaze
Roberto
If looks can kill, I am a-dead now.
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Miscommunication During Political Discussion
Guido
What are your political views?
Italian Official
Benito, Adolf! Be good !... Sorry Guido, what did you say?
[''speaking to his two sons'']
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Unified Plea for Ice Cream
Roberto
I scream, you scream, we all scream for ice cream.
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Innocence Amidst Injustice in Prison
Roberto
So, Jack. Jack, why, why are you put in this prison?
Jack
I don't know, Bob. It was voodoo or somethin', you know. - I was framed. I was completely innocent. You understand?
Roberto
Yes. You are innocent man. I understand. And you, my friend, Jack, why are you put in this prison?
Zack
I was set up, Bob. Just like Jack. I am - an innocent man.
Roberto
I see. You too are a innocent man.
Zack
So, Bob...
Roberto
Yes?
Zack
For why are you in this prison put?
Roberto
Me? I killed a man.
Zack
You killed a man, huh? What'd you do that for, Bob? The guy didn't like ]?
[[Walt Whitman]
Roberto
I never ask-a to dis man if he like-a de Walt Whitman.
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Finding Love and a New Home
Roberto
And now I have falled in love, at last. I have finded my new home. She has asked to me if I stay here, to live together with her forever and ever. Like in a book for children.
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City Behavior vs. Country Behavior
Guido
You can do anything you want in the city. If you want to yell, yell. (His friend yells) Guido: Stop it! What are you, crazy? You can’t act like you do in the country. You’ve been acting like a madman. You can’t yell!
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Unspoken Desires in a Tender Moment
Guido
I forgot to tell you.
Dora
Go ahead.
Guido
You can't imagine how much I feel like making love to you. But I'll never tell anyone, especially not you. They'd have to torture me to make me say it.
Dora
Say what?
Guido
That I want to make love to you - not just once, but over and over again! But I'll never tell you that. I'd have to be crazy to tell you. I'd even make love to you now... right here for the rest of my life.
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A Child's Innocence Amidst Tragedy
Guido (to Giosue)
I told you we’re going to have fun.
Joshua
(watching his uncle being sent to the gas chamber) Where is Uncle going?
Guido
Uh... oh, he's playing on a different team. Goodbye, Uncle!
Joshua
Goodbye, Uncle.
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A Warm Greeting to the Princess
Guido
Buongiorno, Principessa! LET ME GO WITH YOU (Good Morning, Princess!)
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Train Stop for a Family Reunion
Giosué
Look, they stopped the train to let Mom get on.
Guido
Dora...
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The Art of Serving with Dignity
Guido
(learning how to be a waiter) How far do I bow? I suppose I can even go 180 degrees.
Eliseo
Think of a sunflower, they bow to the sun. But if you see some that are bowed too far down, it means they're dead. You're here serving, you're not a servant. Serving is the supreme art. God is the first of servants. God serves men, but he's not a servant to men.
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Excitement of Riding a Train Together
Guido
You've never ridden on a train, have you? They're fantastic! Everybody stands up, close together, and there are no seats!
[''being shipped to a concentration camp'']
Giosué
There aren't any seats?
Guido
Seats? On a train? It's obvious you've never ridden one before! No, everybody's packed in, standing up. Look at this line to get on! Hey, we've got tickets, save room for us!
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A Father's Hopeful Words to His Son
Guido
(carrying his son through the camp) You are such a good boy. You sleep now. Dream sweet dreams. Maybe it’s only a dream! We’re dreaming, Joshua. Tomorrow morning, Mommy will wake us up with milk and cookies.
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Guido's Enthusiasm for a New Home
Guido
What kind of place is this? It's beautiful: Pigeons fly, women fall from the sky! I'm moving here!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.