Memorable Quotes from Sarah Rose Karr
3 quotesFun Game of Guessing Daddies' Occupations
Kimble
Now, we're going to do something extremely fun. We're going to play a wonderful game called "Who is my daddy and what does he do?" Yes?
[a girl raises her hand]
Girl
Is your daddy a fireman?
Joseph
He's probably big. Is he a wrestler?
Girl 2
Is he a basketball coach?
Kimble
No, no, no, no, no, no.
Girl
What's the matter?
Kimble
Oh, I have a headache.
Lowell
It might be a tumor.
Kimble
It's not a tumor! It's not a tumor at all. What I meant was you tell me: Who is your daddy, and what does he do?
[sighs calmly]
Kids
Oh.
Kimble
Get it? (That's the premise of "Who Is My Daddy, And What Does He Do?") Okay, we start right here. You.
[points to a girl]
Girl 1
My dad repairs wrecked cars driven by women who are pinheads.
Boy 1
My dad doesn't do anything since the crash.
Girl 2
My dad gives money to people that doesn't have money...then people use that money... then they give other money back and they give the same amount of money back to my dad.
Lowell
My dad doesn't live with us anymore. He lives in New York and drives a taxi. My mom hopes he's going to die real soon.
Kimble
Mm-hmm.
Emma
Yeah. He doesn't have that much hair because... and he... his head is so big that he can't wear any hats.
Joshua
My dad's divorced. My mom's divorced.
Boy 4
My dad, um, is a psychologist... and he helps people that are hurt or lost their feelings... and, um, that's it.
Tina and Rina
Our mom says that our dad is a real sex machine.
Kimble
Good.
[looks over his shoulders, then returns his attention to Tina and Rina]
Dominic
I don't know what my dad does. I haven't seen him in a long time. He lives in France.
Joseph
My dad is a gynecologist, and he looks at vaginas all day long.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Princess vs. Policeman: A Playful Disagreement
Kimble
Emma, take your toy back to the carpet.
Emma
I'm not a policeman, I'm a princess.
Kimble
Take your toy back to the carpet.
[sternly]
Emma
I'm not a policeman, I'm a princess!
[miserably]
Kimble
TAKE IT BACK!
[loses his patience]
Emma
All right.
[timidly; walks back to the carpet]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Naming Conventions and Family Dynamics
Alice
I don't think words for parts of the body make very good names.
Emily
He's got one of those, I looked.
Alice
I'm sure he does. But I don't think Daddy would want to stand on the porch at night yelling that out.
Emily
But that's what you call Uncle Richard.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.